Trevor and Casey, friends with benefits

"Dude," Casey sighed as she dropped a laundry basket full of junk onto the couch. "Get that tongue in gear."

"Shower first?" her roommate Trevor asked, setting the drinks and nachos on the coffee table. She grabbed her margarita and took a long pull before answering.

"Of course," she finally replied. "I'm not gross. Give me ten minutes."

She disappeared and Trevor turned curiously to the pile of junk in the corner. They had spent all day cleaning out her great aunt's storage and he was actually excited about a few of the things they kept. He admired a vintage brass telephone for a minute and leafed through a couple of books before his eyes settled on that weird little telescope thing.

When they first found it, they spent ten minutes trying to determine what it was. He wanted to keep playing with it but she insisted they had too much work. Travis put it in the "keep" basket and kept hauling boxes of junk.

Now he was examining it again and flexing his jaw muscles. In return for helping him clear out her stuff, Casey got unlimited mouth and hand stuff for a week. She had just spent a boring, sweaty day of hauling old junk around and reminding him that she was going to put her reward to use immediately.

The thing wasn't really a telescope, Travis realized as he turned it over. It was just telescope-shaped, a cone with staggered tapering sides about the size of a pair of glasses. It appeared to be made of some strange metal similar to bronze and had no visible welding seams. The broad end was flat with a small slit across the diameter and the narrow end had a strange little light bulb.

The was a single button in the middle, which caused the light to turn green when held. That was all they figured out in those ten sweaty, irritated minutes in his former great aunt's living room. Now he was holding the button to see if it did anything after a few minutes. He paced the room nervously.

"Good thing I give great head," Trevor muttered as he pulled out his phone. Suddenly the light flashed twice, then turned blue.

He jumped back and let go of the button. The blue light flashed twice and a thin wafer-like thing felt out of the slot. Travis picked it up and squinted at it. It felt kind of like a guitar pick, but somehow... organic? On both sides, a simple font spelled out three words: GIVES GREAT HEAD.

It was weirdly sticky, Trevor noticed as he transferred it from finger to another. Like it had a slight magnetic attraction to his skin. It conformed to everywhere he touched it, settling into his skin and firming up like woodglue.

He put it it experimentally on the back of his right hand. It seemed to almost melt into his skin. He felt a strange tingling sensation and watched it slowly change color to match his skin tone.

Travis blinked and held up his hand. The words now appeared to be tattooed under his knuckles: GIVES GREAT HEAD. He ran his hand across it and didn't feel a seam, but he was able to get his fingernails under it enough to start to pry it off. He let go, watched it melt back into his flesh, and turned back to the strange device.