Moving in with your older sister

"That's not funny, Jan," you say, rolling your eyes.

"It wasn't a joke! I don't want you jacking off in my apartment!"

You roll your eyes, not bothering to correct her that it's "our" apartment now that you're paying half the rent. The house rules conversation had been going well enough up to now -- you grew up in the same home, so you have pretty similar attitudes about sharing responsibilities -- but her trying to legislate your masturbation habits seems absurd.

"How would you even know if I did? It's not like I would whip it out in front of you..." You hope she can't tell how hot that mental image is to you.

"No, but you would leave your crusty socks all over your bedroom and stain all the best bathroom towels, just like you did back at home. Everyone know the day you hit puberty, dude. It was disgusting!"

You blush embarrassed by the discovery that your secret time wasn't quite as hidden as you thought.

"I don't feel like dealing with your cum in the laundry, so we'll just have to find a cleaner way for you to... get it out of your system..."

She says that with a casual shrug, but she very pointedly avoids eye contact at the same time. You know your sister well enough to know that she has an idea that she's too nervous to tell you about. Surely, she can't be suggesting...

"You know I don't have a girlfriend," you say, calling her bluff. "If I can't do it myself, and you don't intend to hire regular hookers for me, then there's only one other person here who could... take care of me..."

She takes a deep breath.

"Just handjobs. And you have to look at porn the whole time, not at me. Deal?"