Trawled the internet.

You know, I count myself lucky that, having grown up on a farm/ranch family, my husband's kinks stopped at just boobs and oversized women. Because I've seen him shove his entire arm up a cow's birth canal, and his fists are HUGE! And getting my pussy stretched out from one direction is more than enough, thank you very much.

Anyway, I spent a few weeks online, scouring forums, online stores, and resellers looking for something more... appropriate for home use, shall we say? The ones I found were either ridiculously expensive, the ones that were an okay price were the wrong kind, the sellers had some weird conditions for them that didn't sit right with me, shady as fuck websites, or whenever I messaged them they either didn't respond or spoke a completely different language. I was getting frustrated and thought about giving up the hunt.

But I stayed strong, and finally got a hit! Some guy across the country was selling a pre-owned portable goat milking machine for almost a quarter of the retail price. We negotiated over email a few times, and for an extra hundred bucks, he would have it delivered to me. We settled the total, I transferred the money, and just had to wait 2-4 weeks for it to arrive.

(Un) fortunately, my husband's influence had rubbed off on me. Because despite how much I wanted to keep it a surprise for him, I told him what I bought for him. And he went from surprised to mad to excited to grateful to lovey-dovey in the span of about 5 minutes. My cheeks hurt from how wide I was smiling, looking at how giddy he was.

Also (un)fortunately, his efforts/attention on my boobs were starting to have results. Whenever I got excited or they were stimulated enough, my boobs would start to lactate. Not like a giant gusher or fountain of the stuff, more little drips and drabs. But it was enough to make him go FUCKING CRAZY. Many a boob-gasm was had by me, and his bone(r)s were stronger and healthier than ever.

The day the machine arrived at our apartment, my husband got straight to work getting the bedroom ready. Towels, extension cables, tools (just in case), cushions, water, his special milk glass, smart tablet; while I was in the bathroom "warming" my self up. He told me to do it there so that he could set up and learn the machine without getting distracted. We wanted no reason to have to call and explain to emergency services as to why I had suction cups stuck on my tits because someone accidentally pressed the wrong button.

I got into the room a little frazzled and on edge, and was leaking from both top and bottom. But before I could do anything, he greeted me with a big smile, put both his arms around me, hugged me tight, put a little kiss on my forehead, and told me that he appreciated everything I did for him, what I was about to do, and that he loved me very much for it.

And I fucking came. It wasn't a big one, and I have no idea how, but I fucking did.

Which turned out for the best, because he got to get a fresh sample straight from the tap, and I was in that post-nut "do whatever the fuck you want to me" kind of dreamy high.

After getting me comfortable leaning back against the headboard, he made sure everything I needed was within easy reach, before handing me the suction cups. There was a quick test against my arm, just so I knew what I was expecting, and for him to see if I was okay with that level of strength and sensation. I told him that I was, but before I put them on my nips, I put on a small coat of lube, just for a little bit of comfort and to minimize chafing.