Osric secretly marries his stepmother

Friar Alan is a fat sleazy priest who owes money to gamblers and whores. Osric offers to pay off his debts if he performs the secret wedding.

"If a word of this gets out, I will have you gutted like a fish" Osric warns the fat priest who is **** to make enough coin to pay off his debts.

Friar Alan sweats profusely "I won't speak a word to anyone milord! My lips are sealed!"

"Good" Osric smiles and leads the fat priest down to the greenfield family crypt. It's already midnight so no one is awake to disturb them.

Alanna was waiting for them in the crypt wearing the same wedding dress she had worn when marrying Osric's father. She smiles radiantly when she sees her husband to be. Osric smiles back knowing that he's about to marry the most beautiful woman in the world!

"You are marrying lady Alanna? But she was married to your father" Friar Alan says confusedly when he recognizes the bride.

"I don't think father will object. In fact he can be one of the witnesses!" Osric points at the likeness of his father carved on the most recent granite tomb.

Friar Alan gulps nervously then nods "As you say lord Osric".

"We should start the wedding" Alanna urges as she is eager to be married to Osric.

"Right" Friar Alan looks scared and anxious to finish the wedding as well because the crypt looks spooky in the candlelight. Osric feels a little scared too when he realizes that they're surrounded by hundreds of dead men but his excitement for the wedding wins over his fear.

"We are gathered here tonight to join this man and this woman in holy matrimony" Friar Alan speaks the traditional lines to start the ceremony. He eventually makes it to the exchange of vows "Lord Osric, do you take this woman Lady Alanna to be your wife, to live together in holy matrimony, to love her, to honor her, to comfort her, and to keep her in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, for as long as you both shall live?"

"I do" Osric says while staring at the woman he loves.

"Lady Alanna, do you take this man Lord Osric to be your husband, to live together in holy matrimony, to love him, to honor him, to comfort him, and to keep him in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, for as long as you both shall live?"

Alanna answers "I do".

She cries from happiness when Osric places the wedding ring on her finger. It's a lot more beautiful than the one his father gave her.

Friar Alan asks the couple to join hands then declares "By virtue of the authority vested in me under the laws of the church, I now pronounce you husband and wife".

Osric feels like the happiest man in the world when Friar Alan tells him "You may kiss the bride".

"I plan to do a lot more than that!" Osric smirks before passionately kissing his new bride. Alanna kisses him just as hungrily. Being wedded as husband and wife has only increased their lust for each other. "We will have the bedding ceremony right here!"