Nearest House

I'm alone on the curb, holding this obviously fake license to fuck. I look around at the empty street, at the love of houses on either side. I stare at the door of the closest house and purse my lips. If this thing is real, my life could be pretty awesome. But if it's fake and i try it on someone I shouldn't, it could go real bad, real quick. I tap the license in my hand a few times before finally deciding.

"Fuck it." I say to myself and I match up to the nearest house.

I knock on the door and wait for a moment. There's a car in the driveway, so I know someone's home. I raise my hand to knock once again when the door finally opens.

It's a middle aged looking man in a casual suit. He's got a touch of scruff on his face.

"Can I help you?" The man sounded like he was irritated but trying to be civil.

I wish I had thought this through a little better, as I have no idea what to say. "Um... I ave this." I hold up the license for him to see. He leans in to read it and something happens. I can't quite explain it. It's like his entire attitude made a total flip change.

"Oh! I see. Well, come on in." He smiled and stepped aside to allow me in. "Did you want to fuck me, my wife, or my daughter?"

"What?" I nearly choked on my own words. He was so casually offering up his whole family?!

"My daughter is at school, but should be back any minute." He explained casually. So if you want her, you're welcome to wait."

"And, just to check, how old is your daughter?" I ask, apprehensive. I don't need this license getting me into any trouble.

"19." He answers. "She's attending the local college and should be getting out of today's class soon."

I breathed a sigh of relief. I may need to test the limits of this license. Make sure if I can't get myself into trouble.

"Did you want to fuck me or my wife while you wait?" The man asks again. Still smiling like nothing in the world is wrong. I'll admit, the guy wasn't bad looking.

"Uh, well..."