Meanwhile, at the Legion of Doo-I mean, 'Rection X!

I'm not exactly sure what happened back at the ol' homestead because I was busy trying to make it look like I hadn't just killed anyone, but I have a guess or two. Bailiff, would you read the transcript of that fateful day?

Sabertooth: Horse pucky! New fish iced Doc Hatfield!

Blob: Bloguth, yo!

Siryn: Tha's troo, but ev'n so, ah still wanna piece o' him in th' warst wey!

Wolverine: I'll mail you a couple, bub, because I'm gonna kill him for killing my special friend the doctor, bub, and he was about to take me to Paris, bub, and I think he was finally gonna pop the question as well as a nut on my constipated terrier face, bub-bub-bub-bub! Grrrrr.

Sauron: I love you/ you love me/ I hate Wade and Cheri O-te-ri.

Copycat: Oh, the way he pulled those triggers was soooo cool! I want him!

Siryn: Y'll be haf'in t'fait m' f'r'im, then.

Copycat: Why fight, when we can share?

Mama Bear: Sharing is horse pucky, along with everything else Sesame Street ever tried to teach me! Vie on what C is for! C is horse pucky!

Baby Huey: Lets go get him, bub, 'cuz 'Rection X don't cotton to no people who said they was with us and they wasn't with us, bub, and I'll never find a more generous lover who still likes bondage, bub and bub said bub to Bub-bub and a-bub-bub to you and yours and bub's, Bub!

Copycat: I totally don't like Wolverine. He's a dork and I hope he gets shot out of a cannon into a wall of TVs playing The Simple Life.

Siryn: I be agree'n with ye! Kiss meh, Copycaht!

Both: Mmmmmmm...smack smack mmmmm...Oh, yeah....oh, yeah....WADE WILSON!!!!

The Jack Man: We should find him and try feebly to attack him, bub, 'cuz we should and stuff, bub.

Jabba: Uh....do youse guyth think you could bring him to me? panting I-I just walked to the bathroom and I'm tho humiwiatingwy fat that I need to thweep fo' WHile.

Rodan: I love you/Vagisil/You're up first, go get that kill.

Blob: Aw m'lan! Moy Hot Pwockets are abwouth to be done! All Pthweventy of 'em.

Siryn: Ah'm totally pretendin' y'r finrger is Wade's penis! Tha's why ah'm doing so many sex-like things with it.

End report.

And why do I think this, you ask? Well, because right now, Blob is free-falling toward me from about twenty stories up and thoughts of those two substituting for me is keeping me from being worried.

By the way, its really too bad you couldn't hear those voices I did for everyone. They were really funny. Sabertooth sounded like Gary Busey!