Marriage Counseling

I know it was unnecessary of me, but I couldn't help myself. I HAD to stop Neville in Hogsmeade village for a quick friendly chat before I was to seduce Hannah. I'm about to take his wife as a breeding vessel, I could at least have the courtesy to be polite to him.

And I needed updates about my previous conquest, from a reliable source and not the tabloids. "Neville salut!"

Neville reacted as if I shot sparks at him but he cheerfully recovered. "Fleur, what are you doing up this way, I heard you were back in France?"

Ok, the downside of spontaneous chat with the next victim is a need to quickly improvise a plausible excuse. My fake veela class wasn't going to cut it with an actual Hogwarts Professor.

"I'm meeting...a friend I made at Hogwarts years ago. She is going to meet me in the Hogs Head."

"Hmm, anyone I know. She couldn't have been a student, as wonderful as Hogwarts is you want a life far away from it after seven very long years. I wish I was one of them."

It's okay, Neville can't know everybody around here, and I doubt he's going to check either. "Just your usual village girl, anyway how are you doing?"

I was glad he chose to accept the change of topic instead of dig further into my lies. "I've never been more exhausted in my life, but it helps being so passionate about plants because I'd have packed it in months ago otherwise."

"Isn't term finished for the year, Gabby came back from Beauxbatons last week?" I asked him.

"The students get the breaks, the professors still have to work. Admittedly not nearly as hard but cleaning up pots, in which failed attempts to plant Venomous Tentacula took place in, is not exactly your standard household chore." Neville's voice was very fed-up, like he was just praying for some good fortune. Sorry Neville, today is really not your day. "Sorry, I shouldn't moan, how's things been for you?"

I put on the dejected face, knowing that a lot of people still thought I was overcoming grief for my infertility. I wasn't about to correct them either. "Things are...progressing. It's beginning to feel like every day is getting brighter than the next."

Neville slapped his forehead in annoyance, then apologetically replied "And I go complaining of the tiniest of things. I'm sorry I'm such a miserable grump."

"Forget about it, how is Hannah?"

"Hannah is Hannah, amazingly good-spirited. If I spent just one full day in her company I'd be happy as Larry." Neville spouted off with his hands together in prayer.

"Who's this Larry?" I ask. Dumb question I know but I am French. You English have like five different ways to say one thing, half of them don't even make sense.

"I don't know, but I know he wasn't a Herbology Professor. But yeah, Hannah is doing great." We'll see about that.

"Tres bien" I quickly tone my voice down a bit "and uhm, how's everything been since the...you-know-what?"

Neville clearly didn't want to be asked questions like that in the mood he's in, becayse he responds sarcastically "I'm not an expert or anything, but I suspect things aren't going very well for them."

"Well yes, of course...bu-"

"Did you know?" he interrupted me, politeness gone now.

"Excusez-moi" I defensively reply, hiding my slight concern about him becoming wise to what I did at the wedding.

"I mean, you were left alone with her for a long time, practically moments before she started publically destroying lives with her "big news". She said absolutely nothing to you?" he dubiously challenged me.

Maybe stopping to talk to Neville was not the greatest idea after all. Or maybe it was, because if he was suspicious about anything it was better I knew about. Especially when I'm about to do a repeat performance on his wife.

"Hermione just rambled to me, it was the usual pre-wedding meltdown quite a few brides have when they're nervous. I had no idea hers had a legitimate reason for it" I insisted convincingly.

It worked on him, as I saw his expression soften and he nodded at what I told him. "I thought so, it's just...it was right out of nowhere. It almost was like Ron getting stuck to that door was a sign that things were about to become disastrous."

I felt myself gearing up to chuckle, but I skillfully transformed it into a grimace. "It was such a terrible thing to find out before your wedding. I imagined it was me and Bill standing there, and that one of us came out with that. Although, perhaps it would have spared us other pain."

As if trying to help me dodge that train of thought, he supplied "Hermione moved back home with her parents. Harry and Ginny tried but in the end it was Hermione's decision. They simply couldn't co-exist with her, and she didn't want them to."

Excellent news. "That's a shame, the fallout of their friendship that is, I cannot condone what Hermione did in any compacity."

"And Ron" Neville chirped to remind me "he deserves every bit of support. He adored, worshipped, and matured for her; he just got it thrown back in his face."

Oh boo hoo. "Yeah, he didn't deserve that."

Neville sighed. "Anyway I've got to get up to the school. Hagrid's got poison oak growing from underneath his hut he wants me to take care of."

"Ok Neville, it was nice speaking to you"

He chuckled a little "yeah sure it was. I'll see you around Fleur."

He waved and started disappearing down the road. I stare after him with relief, but a worrying feeling came over me.

He was definitely thinking differently towards the ruined wedding than others were, if the same was to happen to his own wife then his eyebrows will be definitely raised. Especially when he knew I was present for both. Either I'd just be a bad omen for married couples, or he'll think something peculiar was going on.

It's not necessarily him finding out that worries me, it's the people he could tell. Yes, they may think he's crazy to start with but when there was an inevitable pattern going on he may be taken more seriously. And those Gryffindor's are famous for their investigative ways.

It's an inevitability either way, sooner or later people are going to start joining the dots. But I'd at least like to get a few more women to add to my collection. I technically don't even have one yet.

But if the rumours were true about Hannah, maybe I could make it look a lot less like a wife-snatching, and more of an underappreciated woman finally giving up on a one-sided marriage.

Neville sure spoke good things about his wife, there was some appreciation there. But Neville appreciated anyone who's good to him, it didn't necessarily mean it made Hannah any more special. Most of what he said to me was just complaints, perhaps his mood had less to do with his workload and more to do with his satisfaction in life as a whole.

It was time to find out.

I finally stepped inside the Hogs Head. You can definitely see a woman had an effect on this place, because the last time I saw this place the windows were barely transparent and there was woodworm in the chairs.

The building now felt warmer, in appearance and temperature. The tables and chairs were made out of fresh pine. They had lanterns lighting the room a glorious gold, and the customers appeared much more...normal.

I sauntered over to the bar, taking a seat on a bar stool. Aberforth was too engrossed in talking to a group of elderly wizards to notice me, but Hannah wasn't so oblivious. She turned her head away from where she was politely listening in, and her eyes lit up at seeing more thrilling company.

She bounced over. Perhaps not literally, but there definitely was more buoyancy in her steps than your average woman. That's interesting, I don't remember her having a quirk to her walk before.

Admittedly I'm not an expert on her traits, but this couldn't be a mannerism she picked up one day. There's another girl I know who has a unique quirk to her movements, could it be that Hannah adopted that mannerism as a way of resembling Luna? It is far-fetched as I don't know Hannah all that well, and Neville isn't even here to see it, but it's curious all the same.

"Well here's a face I don't see here often, didn't come all the way from France just to get served in this pub did you?" Hannah was obviously teasing, but it's remarkable how what you joke about can be so close to the truth without realising it.

"I'm sorry to disappoint but I have just come from meeting a friend in Hogsmeade. But if it's any consolation I did choose this pub over the Three Broomsticks on account of you."

"I'm flattered, your probably the first veela I've served in here, that's a moment to savour" she replied.

"Quarter-veela" I corrected.

"All the same, the closest to that has been a glamour model carrying a goose. It was not nearly as good as you being here though. So what'cha havin'?"

After laughing at her model-goose comment, I ordered a sparkling Chardonnay before adding "and whatever you're having. It's my treat." I had my hyper-fertility vial in my purse for when it was needed.

She thanked me before pouring the drinks. "So how are you Fleur?"

Cue sad face "I'm coping"

"Oh, I forgot, I'm so sorry Fleur. But you're out and about which is very good. Talking to people and socialising really can do wonders for you" Hannah stated softly.

I sipped from my wine glass to stop myself blurting out "as well as passionate sex". Instead I said "saw Neville on my way here, run ragged apparently."

Hannah nodded and scrunched her face up. "It was the first time I've seen him during the day for a while, apart from the wedding of course. I only really get to see him late evening and early morning."

"That must be difficult."

"It's better than not seeing him at all though." That comment must be a mantra that runs laps in her mind, trying to make herself believe it.

"Bill could be a bit of a stranger sometimes, days could pass without us saying a word to each other, and mostly because one of us rarely had the time. So I know how you must feel." A complete lie of course.

Hannah's smile finally cracked. I saw it quiver before she drank from her glass to hide it. "Still, it's not his fault."

I put my hand over hers "perhaps not, but that still doesn't mean you have to just accept it."

Hannah shook her head "it's his passion, Herbology. We all have them but sacrifice comes with it."

"Marriage is not something you should sacrifice" I told her firmly. "Hannah, how happy are you truthfully?"

Hannah leant back in an attempt to just walk away from this conversation, but my hand on hers anchors her so she can't. "That's personal Fleur, and none of your business."

"Answer the question and I'll let it go" I told her frankly.

"I'm very happy with Neville."

"Ok. I won't say no more on it." I take a gulp of wine and casually change the subject "Neville said something about Luna earlier. I hear her and Rolf will be back in the UK soon."

Hannah looked into her drink uninterested "oh really". Oh I've so got her now.

"Of course, she'll be up to visit when they do. Neville would like to hear all about her adventures I'm sure."

I heard her jaw click at the sudden spike of irritation "what are you insuating?!"

With all my acting talents in play I put my hands up in surrender "nothing, I meant absolutely nothing by it Hannah. I just meant he'd like to know how his close friend has been getting on, just like Harry and the Weasleys would."

Hannah seemed to have calmed down a little bit "I'm sorry Fleur, I didn't mean to snap at you."

"It's alright Hannah, all is forgiven. But Hannah, I had no idea you disliked Luna so much. I know you're not as close as Neville is to her, but she's a nice girl with a very kind heart. Just like yourself."

"I don't dislike Luna, I just didn't understand what you meant." The lie could not have been more obvious.

"What else could I have meant? Luna and Neville are friends are they not?"

Hannah just got more irritated by the minute "if you're just here to start meddling into people's personal lives, then you better drink your damn wine and go."

"There is no need to be so offensive, I only asked how you've been, you are the one getting so annoyed over casual conversation."

"You ask if I'm happy in my marriage, then ask me why I dislike somebody when I don't, I call that prying" Hannah defended hotly.

"Right, you call it whatever you like. On the other hand, you avoid a simple friendly enquiry into you wellbeing, then get snappy when I mention a girl I thought you were friendly with. I call that someone not confronting their problems, someone who would rather push away a helping hand than allow herself to accept it." The best thing about this is I'm barely needing to be manipulative at all. She's doing my work for me.

Hannah ran out of steam once she realises I'm right. She leans over her glass with her arms hiding her face. I admire her blond hair as the golden light shined on it. She almost looked like a Delacour, she'll fit right in to our family.

"Come on Hannah, is there a more private place we can go?"

Hannah shrugged behind her tangle of limbs "I've got to finish my shift."

"It's quiet, and Aberforth is here. I'm sure he wouldn't deny you a short comfort break if you ask him nicely." I can tell I'm breaking her walls down a bit.

She didn't say anything but she did draw her arms away and walk over to Aberforth. I saw her half-filled glass and slid my hand casually into my bag. I had to be careful in here, too many eyes when it only took one pair to see someone spike a drink.

I'm just glad that on both occasions **** has been involved. The hyper-fertility potion is not tasteless, it weirdly tastes of mild vinegar mixed with wild berry. Very distinguishable in normal drinks, it would stand out for sure in a tea.

But the **** overpowers the potion's taste. Unless you sip it or have very distinguishable taste buds, you won't notice it. And even if they did notice, it would take only one sip to kick their ovaries into top gear.

In this case though, should Hannah be the exception and find out, she would make it terribly hard to complete my goal after that. Here's to hoping she drains it in one, and that she drinks it at all.

I've got to successfully spike it first without getting caught. You know what I'll just leave it til we're alone, I could tell her it's an Euphoria potion and hope she doesn't notice its colour.

I'm glad I changed my mind because suddenly Hannah was right in front of me again. "We've got half an hour, I can apparate us back to mine or we use the Floo."

I expected her to put up more of a fight, seeing as she was incredibly unwilling to talk to me a minute ago. But I won't complain about a bit of good fortune. "Whatever you prefer."

She took me over to the much cleaner and refurbished fireplace, then we both grabbed a handful of powder. She let me go first, telling me where I was going.

I stepped out of green flame and into an apartment too small for a married couple. There was only three doors I could see other than the front door. Likely only one was a bedroom, and one a closet or lavatory. The whole apartment was basically a large squared room with four separate spaces for the living room, kitchen, dining room and an office.

The room wasn't exactly spacey either: A countertop a metre long, an oven, a small sink, and a fridge freezer that dwarfed everything else in the three-by-two metre area that was the kitchen.

The living wasn't really a living room. It was just one sofa, one armchair and the smallest row of books on a small shelf.

The office was actually quite decent, which clearly highlighted Neville's priorities. It had a nice comfy leather chair, an assortment of quills and different coloured inks, plenty of compartments and candles. It even had one of those black metal key things, that looks like a **** device but enables you to write faster, and with easily decipherable lettering.

I was interrupted in my home observation by Hannah stepping through the fireplace behind me. I'm surprised this apartment even had one, maybe they added it after they moved in.

Hannah still looked dispassionate but she did kindly ask "would you like another drink, something warmer and more comforting perhaps?"

"Erm, whatever you're having, I'm not fussed." I took a seat on the sofa, envisioning how I'll be driving home inside Hannah on it.

"Two coffees it is." Hannah didn't have a teapot it seemed, she was heating water up in a saucepan instead. Come on, it is really quite pathetic to live like this, she should be begging for something better rather than settling for it.

Apparently she had read my mind on that instance (not literally, if she was a Legilimens I would have been doomed from the start). "I know it's not exactly grand, but it's home to us."

I'd like to know how Neville's salary doesn't pay for this place three or four times over, but I don't ask that. "How long have you lived here?"

"Seven months. Neville had to pay off the debts for his Herbology program pretty quickly after completing it. This is all we could afford at the time."

"Still, seven months is a long time in a place so small." I should feel sorry for Hannah. I'm not because it all plays right into my hand, but the nicer version of me will be doing the same, but genuinely for her benefit.

"We won't be here long. Next payday Neville says." She didn't say that with any enthusiasm, she's probably heard that after all seven pay days in the time up to now.

"Hannah, it's not my place to say and I adore Neville in my own friendly way...but Merde, you deserve so much better" I sincerely tell her.

"Well, we did get married, our honeymoon was quite expensive, we had pricey wedding presents for Ron and Hermione that obviously went to waste" she countered, listing off things to aide her defence.

"Hannah, do not create excuses. Yes, perhaps you have struggled financially but just look at this room. You have to boil water in a saucepan, you have the most uninspiring living room in the world, the dining room is literally a single table and four chairs. Yet the office, which I'm sure is Neville's domain looks nearly as good as mine, and I'm from a wealthy family."

Hannah stubbornly replied "Neville needs that office."

"He's got a Hogwarts office, why does his home one need to be such a big deal?"

"He takes essays home to mark quite a lot" Hannah was saying all this with her back turned to me.

"And why does he need the black thing? What purpose does that have in all his 'marking'?" I'm finding myself feeling impatient less about getting her naked. But I need to know what planet Neville is on.

"I don't know why he needs the typewriter...he doesn't usually talk to me when he's working." We're beginning to get to the crux of the problem.

"Hannah, surely you saw this already, you didn't need me to say it. Why are you doing this to yourself? Why did you marry him when this was all that you could look forward to? Could you really be satisfied with just this?"

I heard the coffee spoon clang as it fell from her hand and into the sink. I initially thought she was going to snap at me, but she started sobbing instead. I immediately rose off the sofa and rushed round to hold her.

She cried into my cardigan, and I stood there holding her, no need to speak. I felt her face shift sideways a bit so she could speak clearly "I love him".

"Of course you do."

"But I don't think he loves me. He'd rather invent things to do at Hogwarts than have a simple conversation with me. Then the moment Luna writes he suddenly becomes a different person. The last time we even slept together was the honeymoon, and that was very underwhelming in itself."

She pulled away, attempting to dry her eyes but the floodgates were well and truly open. "I know he cares for me, sometimes I see him looking at me and thinking I can't see how guilty he looks. Guilt that he's doing this to me when he knows how much I love him. He's a stupid, dimwitted Gryffindor with too much pride to admit he loves another."

"So why stay here?"

"I thought it would change after we got married, but it only got worse. I guess he felt I was robbing him of the choice, but he didn't have to say 'I do', I didn't make him marry me. But now here we are, I can't leave him because I could not bare it, and he can't leave me without hating himself."

What I'm about to say isn't just to lure her, it also happens to be the truth. "You're wrong Hannah, you CAN leave him. You'd be doing each other a favour, this is not love Hannah. This marriage doesn't deserve your efforts, they just get wasted anyway."

Hannah has stopped crying, but he her eyes remain watery as they look into mine. "But then I'll have no-one."

I cup her face in my hand and stroke her cheek. "You have me" then in a swoop I take her lips on mine. Unbeknown to Hannah, I drew my vial out of my purse when I left the sofa. Now that I had her distracted I emptied the contents into one the coffee cups, reminding myself that the cup to the left was hers to drink from.

With the dosing complete, I focus my attention towards deepening the kiss she was submissive but compliant with. I ventured my tongue into her mouth and she lost herself even more to it. She was flush against me and my hands found their natural path to her waist.

When oxygen was a necessity our lips disengaged. My mouth remained a hairs-breadth away from hers, and at my two inch height advantage over her I could look deep into her eyes from a high angle. Like a guardian angel staring into her very soul.

"I...I haven't ever kissed a girl before" Hannah admitted.

I giggled back "I bet you haven't ever been kissed like that before."

"No, Neville doesn't enjoy tongue, he finds it gross."

"You sure have missed out on a lot" I tell her, pecking her on the lips. "How about we drink those coffees and continue this in the 'living room.'"

I quite enjoyed seeing her smile, that's a pretty smile I wouldn't mind seeing on the face of one of my children."I'd love to."

Striking first, I take the cup on the right, leaving her with the coffee swimming with hyper-fertility. She hastily stops me "wait, you didn't say if you wanted milk and sugar."

Bringing the rim to my lips, I replied "I can't really go wrong with coffee, I drink it under all measures."

This appeased Hannah who took the remaining cup and swallowed it down. I turn and get halfway back to the sofa, with her following, before she said "I think the coffee pot has been open too long. This tastes plain weird."

Choosing to forgo a reply on the coffee I sit on one side of the sofa, whilst she occupies the other. Knowing that she's drunk enough of the potion to be going into overdrive fertility, I quickly try to speed things along.

I lay my cup on the carpet, seeing as there wasn't a coffee table, and lean over to put my hand on her leg. I saw her shiver a little but she pretended it was discomfort. "Erm Fleur, I'm not sure I'm really into girls. The kiss was nice but-"

"Even so, surely hot lesbian sex is far better than having no sex at all, and feeling unsatisfied when you do."

"But there's no attraction there" I don't believe that for a second, and she definitely doesn't.

"If that's so, then I do have an equiliser." I then take her hand and lead it to my crotch. I allow her hand to become weighty, and sure enough she has a hand full of my manhood.

Her eyes fluttered in surprise but she doesn't retract her hand. "How is this possible?"

"It's veela magic, when a veela comes infertile one way our magic can provide another." Sort of true I suppose.

"How long...have you had it I mean?" She added blushing.

"A month. A good replacement if I don't say so myself."

Hannah was freely rubbing my crotch, enjoying the hardening of my sex organ.

"I'm quite big, it will need lubrication first." I started unbuttoning my jeans and shimmying out of them. The moment the waistband stuck around my knees she stuck her hand into my enchanted thong. She fished out my cock as it neared full mast, then pumped the skin slowly and deliberately.

Meanwhile, she grew in confidence and got on her knees beside me on the sofa. Her head was a couple of inches from my long girthy cock, watching in admiration as it grew in her hand.

I was about to suggest she take it in her mouth, but she beat me to it. She wrapped her plump lips around my cock head, swirling her tongue over all the sensitive spots. Then her mouth sealed around the bloated end, trapping it inside.

God this was amazing. There was definitely a thrill in putting my dominance over Hermione, but actual service was far more enjoyable. Hermione eventually wanted it, not that she'd admit it, but Hannah was willing from the start. Just pure pursuation on my part.

She surprised me by dunking her head downwards, engulfing half of my cock. I was right in her gullet now, watching in awe as she slowly sunk inch after inch until her lips kissed my pubic mound.

I left her to start bobbing on my length, diverting my attention to removing her clothes magically. I found a completely different colouring to the pale pinks of Hermione's body, Hannah's pale gold. Her arse was less plump than Hermione's but her breasts were bigger. And whilst Hermione's body was as clear as a blank canvas, Hannah had a cute array of single black moles dotting her legs, torso and back.

Another masterpiece.

I played with her nipples and lightly swatted her arse, earning muffled moans that vibrated my cock nicely. Before long I felt my climax rushing to burst free, and therefore pinned her face as far into my crotch as I could.

I began filling her stomach up with creamy semen. I don't think it even touched her oesophagus on its way down. I was concerned for how long she stayed there accepting my seed in her stomach, the length of time she had gone without air close to a minute now.

Thankfully my orgasm reached its end and she retracted my shaft, slurping and cleaning off the head. As a thank you I guided her head to mine and kissed her deeply, she reciprocated instantly and crawled up to me.

Then she ended the kiss and offered her breasts to me. My tongue lazily licked at one of the black dots residing on her right breast, then kissed a trail to her nipples. She gasped as I took it in my mouth, palming the rest with my hand and tweaking the nipple on the adjacent breast.

She discarded the rest of my clothes and held my mouth at her breast. I pictured myself doing the same thing in months to come, except all those times I was drawing out breast milk and slurping that down. Then when her nipples got too sore I'd switch to Hermione's breasts until I had my fill.

Hannah though wanted the main event so she pushed me back a little and turned around, sticking her arse out in invitation. "It's all yours."

It sure is. All of it is mine. I'm not gonna wait any longer to claim it.

With an act of passionate roughness, I pulled up behind her and pushed her face into the sofa. I got on one knee and leaned my hips in at the right height for entry. I brushed the tip up and down, collecting her juices with it. When I'm ready to enter I just position myself and ram without a word.

I didn't get a shock like I did with Hermione giving her virtue away to me, but she felt just as tight as I remembered Hermione being. I gripped her hip with one hand whilst the other planted Hannah to the cushion. I thrust in a few times, easing in and out slowly before I decided to change positions.

I got up on my haunches and started pounding Hannah from above. It's not just the ideal breeding aspect that makes me use these positions, it's the dominance that comes with it and the powerful feeling it gives you. I felt like a queen putting her sex slaves in their place.

My legs straddled her back, I was literally riding on her, plunging her depths with my cock. I heard her 'ooo' and 'ahhh', allowing me to take her hard and fast. My balls slapped and her arse cheeks jiggled. I kept my free hands occupied by taking a breast in each hand and squeezing the flesh like stress balls.

"O-Oh F-Fleur, I'm gonna c-um."

"Cum for me Hannah, crush my cock with your pussy walls" I encouraged.

The dirty talk did it. I watched her spine bend and her hips rear up. My cock was in a vice. I stilled my thrusts, letting the head poke at her cervix. I lean right over, and put my tongue in her mouth to share in her breathless bliss.

As her orgasm finished my thrusts restarted. I dig in my nails just to see them leave marks on her skin, knowing the sensation is more pleasing than painful.

The veela part of me purred and growled. Sex was a **** to it. You saw a glimpse of it when I was warning Hermione she was about to be bred. The veela didn't care, it will tell whoever what it wanted with them, regardless of what I wanted.

But on this occasion I was happy to let it loose.

I twisted a handful of Hannah's hair and yanked her head backwards. All she got out was a gasp before I hissed into her ear "I lied, I really did come all this way for you. I came here to fuck you, just like I did Hermione. And just like her, you will be bred with my child. She was a fighter, she resisted but in the end she couldn't deny what she knew she wanted. You were easy, you were gagging for attention, and that makes you a slut. My slut."

Half-moaning, half-gasping Hannah replied "W-why? Why are y-you doing all this?"

"Because I'm Fleur Isabelle Delacour."

Then on cue my ball released its fertile load deep inside her womb. I sat on her behind and flicked my hair out of my face to flow down my back, letting the seed ooze out of my cock. I breathed in the sweat and smell of sex, wondering if Neville will even notice if he smelt them like I did.

I felt the last dribble slide out of my cock and patted her sweaty back. I kissed her nape and quickly got off her.

"Don't tell Neville about this" Hannah pleaded. "And I won't tell anyone what you told me about you and Hermione."

I laughed as I started redressing. "Hannah, even as my concubine it's still better than what Neville has offered you. Of course I'm not going to tell him...you are."

"But we're married, I can't leave him." Hannah still didn't get it did she.

"Do you really think Neville is going to raise a baby he knows isn't is?"

Her face was comical as her hands dived to her abdomen "I might not be pregnant."

"Oh, you are. MY coffee tasted perfectly fine."