Leave it at home

{if Deviance <= 15}I'm sorry, but there's just no way I'm wearing that unless I have to. I'm not that perverted.

{endif}You shrug with annoyance at the camera guy, and make a show of retriving the buss pass, and then tossing the purse onto your sofa with frustration. Twirling dramatically, you then head for the door.

Hopefully some viewers will believe that you genuinely just forgot to bring the butt plug, as opposed to being a spoilsport.