Interviews Part 1

Diaochan

Sable Cicada

"Diaochan welcome to the show. I have to say we're all so excited to have you here with us."

"You're too kind." The beauty tucks a lock of hair behind her ear.

"How are you feeling about your big debut, do you think the fans are going to respond well to you?"

She sighs. "Where I'm from women are to be seen and not heard. It seems that there are some powerful personalities at work in this game, I'm afraid I'm going to become window dressing for them."

"That's true, some of those girls are out of control. Maybe people will come to appreciate you as a reliable, and even headed ****."

"Perhaps. For now, I have to hope that pleasing the master will keep me in the game, and my fan base will build."

"Let's talk about that. You seem to have adjusted to the game with a remarkably low level of mental distress, to what do you owe this?"

"Well compared to Hell..."

"Even for the other contestants, I mean."

"Oh." She shrugs. "My purpose is to serve. All that I have is for that purpose, my beauty, my wits. I would be more distressed had you simply let me out onto the street and told me that I was free."

Erica

Partner to Joan of Arc

"Oh one sec." Erica holds up her finger towards the camera, and in a burst of light, Joan of Arc is sitting next to her in, her own chair. "Ready."

"Welcome Erica, welcome Joan, thank you so much for joining the show this season. Your addition really let's us hit some key demographics, The Living, and Celestials."

"Happy to help Skylar." Erica gives a toxically fake smile.

"So tell me how the two of you met. How did this all come to be?"

Joan clears her throat. "When we first heard your producers were thinking of Lucifer for the next season, we thought it would be a good chance to... uh, how you say?" She has a lovely french accent.

"Prank him into the ground."|

"Yes, this is it." Joan nods. "Prank him into the ground. So I come down to Earth, I say Erica you are good Catholic girl, we Saints we call you to do war with hell. You know?"

"And you just agreed to that, did she detail anything?"

"Oh sure. We have to stop the birth of a Queen of Hell from disrupting the balance of the universe. I have to survive through a bunch of Hentai level sex, blah, blah, blah eternal damnation, blah blah blah ever lasting glory. So I took it, I mean Trig is killing me this semester, I was about to drop out anyway, so might as well serve the greater good while I'm at it."

"This little alliance of yours seems to give Erica quite the advantage. What sort of helping will you be providing her as the show goes on."

Joan shrugs. "All is as God wills it."

"You're not going to tell me?"

Erica smiles. "She hasn't told me."

"How do you know you can trust her? What sort of partner doesn't share such important details?"

"Hear me." Joan raises her hand. "When I was child, I hear the voices. They say 'Joan, Charlemagne he beg God to deliver France.' They say 'Joan, you will deliver France.' I say 'This is fantastique, let's go." But they say 'No, God has not chosen the time or place.' I hear their voices for years, but I never go. Then in the final year France loses a big battle, Orleans is under siege, and the voices come. Then I know all."

Skylar sighs. "What sort of director doesn't tell his actors, where their marks are? What harm could telling Erica possibly do? Don't you think it would make her feel safer knowingh what protection you'll afford her?" Skylar pauses. "Or is it that you're not protecting her at all, and just don't want to lie?"

Joan shrugs. "I do not know. What harm could come from Skylar knowing? I can not see." She shrugs again.

"It's called faith." Erica says, half to herself.

Helen

Princess of Troy

"Think I could get that title changed to Queen of Sparta?"

"Helen of Troy is how the world knows you. Besides did we not give you your tight hot, Helen of Troy body?"

Helen smiles. "Things may have gotten a little loose there at the end, but I was always hot." She reclines on her interview chair. "It is nice to be young again though."

"I'm sure. Your big debut is over, how do you feel about yourself in this critical first stage?"

She ponders this. "I think my competition made it easy for me. They were so busy pissing off The Devil they didn't have time to notice little Helen over here."

"That cuts both ways, worried the Audience might not have noticed you?"

"Please." She scoffs. "Look at me." She arches her back, and moans, and blood pressure rises around the nation.

"You're very attractive, but you can't lean on that, not in this competition. Diaochan and Eve are both as beautiful if not more. You've got to have something else to help you along."

"Isn't that what the transformations are for?"

"Helen you're not going to wait for those, to form your strategy are you?"

"I go with the wind baby. What's the point of having a plan, if my transformation goofs it up? I'm willing to bet that these other ladies are evil, and cruel enough that the audience is going to get sick of them. I'm actually a nice person. I like people, I want to do good. I think people will want to see me succeed. I'll use the changes they choose for me to make them happy, and they'll reward me in kind. It's going to be a partnership between me and the audience. Besides, and this isn't a threat; who do you want ruling hell? A pretty girl like me, or that Psycho Olympias?"

"She scared you too?"

"Ugh." Helen cringes. "She's awful."

"Anyone you like in the cast?"

Helen shrugs. "Truthfully? Not Many. Joan, Boudica, and Olympias all seem Violent. I don't like Diaochan, and that's not my own personal sickness informing my decision. If she was trapped in Hell with Lucifer, she's evil. I don't know what her deal is, but she can't be trusted. Plus I can't be friends with anyone as beautiful as me, I know that's awful, but it just doesn't work. So Eve's out, obviously. The two of us being equally beautiful and all. I'm friends with myself, because selfcare is very important, and you'll never be ready to receive love, if you can't give it to yourself. Which leaves Cleo, who I'm kind of already friends with. Sometimes when we're being tosses around in the endless hurricane of Lust, we see each other, and scream for help as we pass on by. She seems cool, much prettier stationary. Except for that nose of course."

Nzinga

King of Ndongo and Matamba

"Hello my king, enjoying The Lodge?"

Nzinga crosses her legs. "It's been lovely thank you. A week's vacation was a good way to get me ready for the show."

"Sorry about the mix-up, by the way. I hope you haven't gotten too much of an advantage from getting here early."

"Don't worry." Nzinga winks. "I was only able to binge three seasons in that time."

"So you know a few of our tricks huh?"

"Oh no." Nzinga wags her finger. "You're not going to get me to say anything I regret. I'm sure you're capable of surprising me in all kinds of ways. Me being alive for instance. Didn't see that coming."

"Yes. Viewers on twitter were wondering. Why are you in hell? You bravely defended your kingdom against colonizers, and became a safe haven for slaves across Africa."

Nzinga nods. "At some points yes. At some points no, and at some points at the behest of our master, I renounced god to become the ruler of a country."

"We all make mistakes."

"That seemed to be mine."

"So you've already told us what you think of the Harem. What do you think of our own performance so far? This is your big debut."

Nzinga thinks. "I can only compare my entrance to Eve, and I think she wins that competition. You should be careful by the way, he was not happy you dragged her into this. I saw it in his eyes."

"We can handle Lucifer. Your entrance?"

"I'm nervous. I had the second least amount of time on screen, and Lucifer didn't even notice me."

"The previous introduction was a rough one to follow."

"Once we get running I think I will find my ground, and do well. I thrive in the middle of conflict, my light will shine once the competition starts I am sure."

"You only got a few moments with them, but did any of the competition stick out to you?"

"No. I found them all agreeable."

"You and Boudica butted heads some."

"Boudica is ruled by her passions, I get the feeling she'll butt heads with everyone. I take no offense at our earlier spat. It's actually that Erica girl I'm more worried about."

"Scared of her saint?"

"Oh no, I worry for the child. This world makes us compromise. Our beliefs, even ourselves sometimes. It demands it or we die. If she has that saint over her shoulder telling her to never waiver, I worried she's going to end up eliminated and discarded, and no saint will touch her then."

Skylar smiles. "We're counting on it."

Voting is still going on in the previous chapter, so be sure to drop by there, and submit your votes!