How I learned about No Nut November part 8

We did okay actually, preparing the food and all. We rarely talked past each other and over all worked great together. The cooking process was going to take a few hours, so Joe and I went on into the living room. I noticed how cold it was in the rest of the house, so I turned up the thermostat while Joe walked up to the radiator by the window. I joined him, leaning my back against the radiator, while he looked out into the front garden.
“Gwen?”
“Ya?”
“Did you clean your windows recently?”
I turned around. The window pane was not clean at all.
“No. What makes you th-”, then I spotted what he meant.
“It looks like someone was standing in your flower bed recently. Are you being stalked?”
Images of Saturday night shot into my head. Then the morning and the mailman. It was probably him taking a peek.
“Uhh- no, not as far as I know…”, I stammered.
“Well, that doesn't have to mean much.”, Joe crossed his arms.
I didn't want to tell him about my suspicion, because that would've meant to tell him about what I did. I had to come up with an idea. Then Bruno shot across the front yard.
“Ooh!”, I exclaimed, “I remember: Bruno has taken a shit in between the roses. To prevent the smell from getting too bad, I bagged it and threw it out.”
It was either an obvious lie or a very abstract truth, but Joe seemed to believe me. Or at least he noticed my lack of concern and decided that it wasn't that important. He turned around and leaned against the radiator, just as I did before. After looking up and down the street, I turned around, sat up on the window sill and leaned against Joe's shoulder. Joe slowly put his arm around me. I closed my eyes.
“Is that your grandma's couch?”, Joe asked.
“It used to be. Now it's mine.”
“It used to be…”, he mumbled, “I wondered what sick and twisted things it has seen.”
I slapped his chest and laughed.
“You perv! You're talking 'bout my grandparents.”
He laughed, “Not necessarily.”, with that he pinched my skin right next to my boob.
“Ouch!”, I laughed and jump up from the sill. “And here I thought you were a gentleman.”
“Oh!”, Joe grabbed me by my shoulders and pulled me closer. “You'll come to find that I am many things but not a gentleman.”
I bit my lower lip, “Is that an offer or a threat?”
He just said “Yes” and smirked, before kissing me. I wrapped my arms around him and pressed my body against his. Within seconds, I noticed the bulge in his pants and began to slowly slide my hand down his chest. But Joe grabbed my wrist, forcing me to stop. He broke the kiss.
“Shouldn't we wait till after lunch?”
I shook my head. I had dreamed about him, thought about him, and now had him here. And now I was supposed to wait. Never. I jumped up, wrapping my legs around his waist.
“Gwen, please — can we — ”, he spoke between my kisses, “take it — uh — slower?”
I stopped the kisses.
“Really?”
He nodded.
“Ok”, I said, a little disappointed. “What do you want to do then?”
Joe walked over to the couch and sat down, me still in his arms and then on his lap.
“How about we cuddle and talk a little? I'd like to learn something about you.”
I fixed my position, resting my head on his lap and my legs over the armrest. Joe began caressing my hair.
“Well, I don't know… What do you want to hear?”
“Tell me about where you used to live, maybe?”
I told him about how I grew. About my parents' divorce and the time I was suspended from school, for punching a guy's teeth out.
“What made you that angry?”
“He dumped my best friend.”
{guys} raised an eyebrow.
“It was the way how he broke up with her. He made Sasha pregnant and wanted to **** her to keep the baby, by threatening to expose her. She thought she was too young to be a mother, and she was right. Eventually, she had an abortion. This motherfucker…”, my hands curled into fists, “This… unlovable human being, send videos and pictures of Sasha around. Of course, he was suspended from school, but I felt like that wasn't enough.”, I paused, then looked into Joe's eyes.
“Have you ever been in a fight?”
He looked away.
“Yeah. It was the most humiliating day of my life.”
“Would you tell me?”
“It was in year nine, I think, when I saw a random dude pushing my girlfriend — the first girlfriend I ever had — against a wall while making out with her. I thought maybe he was harassing her, so I walked up to them and sucker punched him from behind. We threw a few punches, until eventually my 'girlfriend' told me to fuck off. Apparently she liked him better than me.”
“Oh, I'm sorry for you. Have you had better luck since then?”
He shook his head.
“I think lunch might be ready.”, I said to change the topic.
“Finally, I feel like I could eat a whole cow.”