His Wife.

"Hey, Hon!"

The chirpy, upbeat voice belonged to Julie, Sam's wife of 21 years. Friends and family would say that Sam and Julie were high school sweethearts who married right after graduation and Julie herself liked to project that image, but the reality was that Sam had spent his senior year casually hooking up with Julie until one drunken night he had forgotten to use protection and ended up stuck with her.

Which was not to say that he hated or resented Julie, because he really didn't. She was reasonably attractive, good natured and a wonderful mother to their daughter Stella. Sam could certainly do a lot worse and he knew it. Though the years had caused them both to settle into more of a peaceful coexistence rather than the passionate relationship they had in their teens.

"Hi babe," he replied, trying to keep the exhaustion out of his voice, "What's up?"

"Not a lot, but uhhh," she trailed off sheepishly, "you haven't left work yet have you?"

"No...why?"

There was a pause, followed by a fake laugh, "I need you to do me a tiny favour."

Sam grunted. "What?"

"Do you remember that little cafe a few blocks down from the office?"

"Vaguely"

"Great, well, Stella goes there all the time and I need you to duck over and pick me up a couple of those chocolate brownie thingies for her graduation party."

"Isn't that on Friday?" He frowned, " can't you just grab them tomorrow, or I dunno, the day of?"

There was a sigh on the other end of the phone, as if he had just said something incredibly naive. "No Hon, I'm working on a batch at the moment but I need a sample to compare with to make sure I'm on the right track. It's a whole process."

Frankly Sam thought it was utterly asinine, but it had been a long day and he didn't have the resistance left in him to argue. "Fine," he grumbled, "but you owe me one."

"Oh?" There was a soft laugh, "and what exactly do I owe you for this small, trivial errand that'll take you less than five minutes on your way home?"

Sam sat back in his chair, recalling an old Family Guy gag. "When I get home, I get anal."

He snickered to himself. The life of motherhood had turned Julie into something of a prude, and crass jokes like that would leave her scandalised. Which would be worth it, considering that Sam got his jollies by trolling the woman every now and then.

But the response he got wasn't chastisement or any kind of reproach. Julie's reply came in the same upbeat tone she always maintained.

"Ok Hon, when you get home, you get anal!"

Sam frowned, unsure what to make of that response. He glanced at the clock. Five o'clock. "Well, look I gotta go, I'll get the brownies or whatever. See you in a bit."

"Bye Hon, I'll be waiting!"