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Chapter 1708
by
Fiftyfiftyfifty
What do you do?
Follow her back to camp.
It isn't a difficult walk. You follow alongside the river until the bridge is a distant memory. You, Niki, and Xiaoqing guide the reins of your emus, while the others walk ahead, though the ground very swiftly becomes rocky and more difficult to navigate. Thankfully the mounts you've chosen are not only strong but aren't bothered too much by course terrain. You move up and down short hillsides, until you spot an increasing number of trees ahead. It isn't enough to warrant the description of a forest, though between it, rocks, and shrubs, you can see why it was chosen as the location for their base. You still can't see it, even this close.
Though eventually Kaelana leads you around the bend and all manner of shelters surrounding an unit bonfire come into view. There are some lean-tos, though most structures are quite impressive for something meant to be temporary. There are huts of logs and stones, with rooftops made from thick branches and leaves, as well as canvas and other materials they likely brought, perhaps stolen from other travellers on the road. There's one larger than the rest, and that's the direction your guide is taking you.
Unfortunately for her, plenty of eyes are drawn as you enter.
You can see over a dozen faces--some attempting to hide, others not. You see all different sorts here, from elves to dwarves to humans. They're not dressed by uniform, so it's a variety of appearances, though your guess is that the one thing they all share is the tattoo Kaelana has on her rear. Just that she is the only one with hers exposed.
One gruff man in particular hurries over with a crooked combat knife in his hand. "K-Kaelana!" he calls out. "What happened? Did these people beat you, strip you down, and now they're marching you back here as an example?"
"What? No!" she responds. "You know how my stupid ring works. Now get out of my way. We're going to Monarch, and I need my clothes ASAP."
"Oh. Right." He stares for a moment. Then his eyes dart down and up. Red glows in his cheeks. Yes she still wears your cloak, but it isn't a replacement for clothing.
"L-Let's go already!" Kaelana seems about done with her situation. "Come on. We're almost there."
You can hear murmuring amongst the group. Most are curious as to what is happening, though you get the idea that their leader isn't the only one to know your face. Back when Thadius was temporarily king, he posted wanted powers everywhere. You may be dressed differently now, but the artist they got to sketch your mugshot did an exceptional job unfortunately.
Though more extravagant, the hut is still crude. Instead of a front door, a wide piece of violet fabric hangs in the doorway, which Kaelana stops at before entering. "Excuse me, Monarch. But I have someone here I think you'll want to meet."
"Oh do you now?" The voice from inside is poise. She speaks with elegance, though the sort you've heard before by those such as Malakae or other nobility. You don't know if the confidence is warranted like one of genuine experience, or it's another girl trying to play queen. "Give me a moment then, Kaelana. I will come to you. First I must assemble myself. Not that I am not already perfect of course. Ho ho ho~!"
The way she speaks. An elf? I think I've spent enough intimate time with elves to know their specific cadence. I don't mean the cocky part of course. Amara doesn't say stuff like that.
By the time you've gathered back down by the bundle of logs in the center of the encampment, the cloth door is thrown open.
Kaelana quickly whispers to you, "Remember. I'm kinda going behind her back on this one. She'll probably be stoked to see you, but you can't just ask her what's wrong. From her point of view, everything seems to be normal."
She appears with a flourish. Coming down the path is a woman of golden hair, though with more a tint of red than Amara's holy locks. Just as you had suspected, she is an elf. Her ears appear longer those belonging to the elf you're with, and tracing around vibrant pinks eyes is the intricate line work of one who cares much for their appearance. Her lashes are bold, and her cosmetics give her adorably pink cheeks and lush red lips. Her hair, though long, is done up into spiral pigtails--the method of which is a world like this you have no idea, so you come to the conclusion that it must be magic.
The dress she wears is like that of a noblewoman. her shoulders puff out--arms bare without sleeves, though at the tips of each finger she decorates long, groomed nails with jet black paint. Her chest is rather present--not gigantic, though the cut of her dress certainly shows them, aided even moreso by how the wardrobe seems to be pushing them upwards. The dress is tight around her waist. You aren't sure if she's wearing a corset beneath, or she truly is that slim in the middle, but the outfit flourishes at her hips, and the sends before her knees. The entire thing is a detailed pattern of orange and black, as if the entire thing has been constructed by the wings of giant butterflies.
A silver necklace hangs from her neck. Though it isn't like gems that adorns the chain, but what look to be the teeth of great beasts. Her feet are covered by hardy heeled boots that tear up the soil as she sashays all the way over, and at this point, the attention of the entire camp is on your group.
You feel strange in her presence, like trying to read her brings a discomforting squeeze to your guts. Something really is wrong. If this isn't how it normally feels around her, then Kaelana was right to seek help.
Monarch speaks again. As she does, she flicks her wrist, whipping one of her pigtails to the side. "For what reason do you bring outsiders to our camp without permission, Kaelana? Honestly, I should bind all of you right now, and end it before you can leak out location to anybody else."
"This isn't just any outsider!" Kaelana defends herself. "Look at the man's face."
The leader of the bandits furls her brow. With a hand on her chin, she leans in close and inspects you thoroughly. Then slowly, her eyes widen. Red starts to glow even past her makeup, but before her flushed expression can show, she swiftly turns her back on you. Unfortunately for you, your Kitty Sense alerts you to what's happening. Upon realizing who you are, she's becoming quite flustered, and is **** to swallow it down as to not show weakness. It takes longer than desired.
Eventually though, she does face you again.
"The Demon King of Tivera, here in my camp," she says in an attempt to once more extrude confidence over the situation. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"
You place a hand upon your chest. "Well when I heard the queen of bandits was nearby, I had to come see for myself. The Crookblade Bandits are known far and wide," you lie through your teeth. While probably not untrue, you certainly didn't know about them until less than an hour ago.
"I am always willing to meet with Demon Kings. So, be honoured. For the rest of this day, you will be granted the blessing of existing in my presence." She twists her body and turns to once more face away. As she does, she flicks her spiral hair yet again. "You did well, Kaelana. Everybody! Whether you know the name or not, the man known as Kyle Warren will be joining us for a feast. Crack open the drinks, as there is no better way to do business."
Demon Kings. Plural? I wonder if she's made deals with any others I know. "Not exactly what I expected from a bandit," you whisper over to Kaelana.
"I know. Everybody says that," she replies.
"But she doesn't normally act this way, right? Pompous. Arrogant. Thinks she's an actual princess."
"... No. This is how she's always been."
"Oh."
"It's impossible for a stranger to know, but I've been around her for a long time now. N-Now excuse me. I'm gonna go grab my clothing."
You nod, and then return your focus to the gathering. Monarch's people surround her like subjects, though they don't knee. They look to her with admiration, and when the casks of mead are tapped, they cheer to her name. Though she looks and acts like the most wealthy and powerful nobleman's daughter, it's clear she's not afraid to dirty her hands. How she chooses to appear doesn't dictate her experience. What Kaelana said is true, that you can't really make a comparison when you haven't met her before, though you do have a feeling she's onto something. Your Kitty Sense is never wrong, and you feel a constant sense of danger when you focus your attention on her. You just can't figure out why.
What do you do?
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A New World! Your Party of Hopeless Hotties
(Game) After being transported to a fantasy land, you try to assemble a normal party of girls, but things are never that simple.
Click "Start Game"! You've been mysteriously brought over to an RPG-style world of sexy elves and powerful magic, but things aren't as easy as you first imagined. The only adventurers that you're able to recruit into your party are cute girls that are entirely hopeless, and kinky as hell! Hopefully you don't die because of them. (This story was inspired by Konosuba. Cover is from Sakura Knight. Also known as YPoHH.) ----- We have a wiki now! Too many characters to keep track of in this setting? Check out the constantly under-construction reference site here: https://www.worldanvil.com/w/absoterra-fiftyfiftyfifty
Updated on Jun 11, 2026
by Fiftyfiftyfifty
Created on Apr 4, 2020
by Fiftyfiftyfifty
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