Go to the pingpong table.

Upon the pingpong table, a newspaper lay spread across, smeared with gum. The following article is up:

NEW MOTION TO MAKE DEFILING NEWSPAPERS ILLEGAL
The punishment will be nothing short than public spanking. Fake Geniuses are warned.
"Bubble gum belongs in the mouth, not on legitimate news media" says concerned spokesperson.

In the corner, someone wrote something with a black sharpie. A number:
9001

Huh.