Be the nice guy, keep it goofy

You flop onto your bed, thumbs fiddling with your phone. Mary’s “challenge one: make me laugh” is still hanging in your chat like a dare, but instead of shooting from the hip, you decide to play it safe. Be polite, sweet, hell, you’ll prove you’re boyfriend material, not just another Bay Area creep with a flame app.

You: “Alright, joke time. Why don’t programmers like nature? …Too many bugs”

You stare at the screen, grinning at your own joke like a dad at a barbecue.
A pause. Then finally:

Mary: “Haha. Classic.”

It’s short, a little flat, but you cling to the “haha” like a lifeline. You lean into the nice-guy lane harder, convinced you can charm her with wholesome banter.

You: “Glad you liked it! Anyway, I gotta say, you seem super fun from your bio. Turning 18 is a big deal. Happy belated birthday”
Mary: “Thanks lol.”

Dots disappear. She’s gone quiet. You press on.

You: “So what kind of fun experiences are you looking for? Like skydiving fun or like… binge-watching Netflix fun?”

Silence. You check your Wi-Fi like maybe the world glitched. A minute later, the typing bubble flickers to life.

Mary: “Idk yet. Just figured I’d try this out.”

You nod to yourself like she can see it, heart weirdly warmed.

You: “That’s cool. I’m honestly the same. I’m new around here, don’t know many people. Just looking for someone chill to hang out with.”

You’re basically narrating your own loneliness at this point.
Nothing. The typing bubble doesn’t come back.
You try again twenty minutes later, telling yourself she’s probably just busy.

You: “So what do you usually do for fun?”

The message sits there, a little blue checkmark mocking you. No reply.
The next morning, you open the app. The match list still shows her name, her goofy selfie, her teasing little bio. But when you click the chat, it’s barren. No new messages. Just your last smiley face staring back.
Hours stretch into a day. Then two. Then a week.
Mary never answers.
You tell yourself she must’ve been busy. Or lost interest. Or maybe met someone else.