Are You Smarter Than Chrissi?

"I pick suit case number five." Said Lisa, praying to the good lord that it wasn't a bimbofication case.

"Woah, not so fast there!" Said Jack, smiling broadly.

"Huh?" Lisa was confused, her eyes glancing between the case and the host of the show. In between those two points was Chrissi who was wearing 6 inch high heels, black stockings, and a sea-green corset-teddy. She was doing a little dance routine in front of the seated audience, who were cheering her on.

"We're going to have a little warm up, a mini-game before the main event. Show you the ropes, give the audience a taste of your personality, and find out... Are! You! Smarter! Than! Chhrrriisssiii!?"

Lisa Saint blinked and things suddenly changed. Her clothes were wet with sweat and Chrissi was standing beside her. Lisa could feel new articles of clothing on her herself. Her underwear had changed from a simple bra and panties into a string bikini. There was a thick collar around her neck and her shoes had been replaced with modest raised heels. And a pair of podiums, each with a big glowing green button on top, had appeared in front of her and Chrissi. Cheerful music was being played by a sound system somewhere overhead.

"First question for both of you fine ladies, which is why I am going to dumb it down: Who put the thingies in front of you?" asked Jack.

Lisa's lips quivered in confusion as Chrissi slapped the big green button and cried out:

"Oh, like, Lisa did!"

"That is correct! If you look up at the screen, you'll see we used the Brain Adjustment Bracelet to put Lisa into '**** Mode.' We then commanded her to sprint to the backstage changing room where she put on her new attire, and then carry the two podiums back on stage. Once she exited **** Mode, she forgot everything she had done." Lisa watched the big screen in horror. It showed footage of herself doing things she couldn't remember while confirming Jack's explanation. He continued:

"That is a point for Chrissi, and a reminder to Lisa that if you misbehave, the producers will activate **** Mode and you'll find things have suddenly changed, probably for the worse." Jack grinned wolfishly at the audience. He then turned back to the two contestants: "Next Question... What does it mean if a case that Lisa picks has a dollar symbol inside?"

That part of the cursed game seemed familiar to Lisa, and being **** to seem smarter than Chrissi, she slapped the button in front of her while answering:

"I earn money or, I mean, I get moved up one spot on the money board?!"

"OOoh! So close! That is how this game works normally but we've changed things up, just for you! You see, the producers and The Accountant for this show weren't comfortable with the remote possibility of you earning any amount of money for your homophobic church. So instead every cash case you get will be donated to charities that are supportive of the LGBTQ+ community!"

Lisa scowled, she deserved a reward for being here, not those delusional godless people.

"Next Question, what will happen if a case that Lisa picks has a pink heart inside of it?"

Chrissi's face lit up with a big dumb grin and she slowly raised her perfectly manicured hand to press the button in front of her. But Lisa was quicker and knew the answer, even though she didn't want to. She gulped before answering, "It's a bimbofication case and the audience will get to vote on a change that I'll be **** to undergo."

"That is... 100% correct! Congratulations Lisa, you are now tied with Chrissi!" The audience applauded after Jack's overly dramatic response. Their cheers sounded condescending. Jack then added "If you get all ten cash cases, a billion dollars will be donated to queer causes. If you get all ten bimbo cases, you'll become a mindless bimbo, ruled by your own lusty needs!"

"Second to last question... If a case that Lisa picks has a question mark within, what will happen?"

Lisa hadn't been briefed on this and looked around in a panic. Chrissi was biting her own luscious lips and squinting her mascara lined eyes as her shrunken bimbo brain had a thought. She then pressed her button with a dainty finger.

"Like... she'll have to choose if she want's to be more pretty or like... if pretty people get money?"

"Very Good Chrissi, you are correct! Lisa will have to choose between undergoing a change or giving to a Queer charity. You see, unlike certain Churches, we at BoB believe in giving others a choice." Said Jack with a smug smile.

Lisa tilted her head as she considered this tweak to the rules. A billion dollars could corrupt so many pure souls and lead them to homosexuality! But she couldn't risk becoming a bimbo pre-occupied with pre-marital sex, she needed to still fight for Jesus! She would have to become partially corrupted to prevent the maximum amount of wealth from going to those bad causes.

"It looks like we missed some of Chrissi's brain matter when we melted it with The Collar of Fate. Speaking of collars, how are you liking yours, Lisa?"

She hadn't touched the collar, not wanting further confirmation that the dreaded thing was there. She replied: "It fits just fine but is it really necessary though? You've already got the bracelet on me."

"The bracelet is just there to keep you in line and prevent you from remembering. The Collar of Fate will make you a bimbo, or at the very least, sinfully beautiful."

Lisa looked away from Jack. The last thing she remembered was hitting her head on... something. some art supplies. Or was it a table. The memory had been so clear earlier. Was her memories undergoing some kind of degradation? How long ago was that? What had they erased from her mind? She then grit her teeth in determination, it didn't matter, she still had her faith in Jesus. No infernal technology could ever take that from her.

"Lisa, Chrissi, this will determine if Lisa is as smart as our resident bimbo. The last question is: If the brief case that Lisa picks has an exclamation mark within, what will happen to her?" As soon as Jack finished asking his question, Lisa hit the button. She stammered her response:

"I ,uh, It will-- I'll get excited?"

"No sorry. What will actually happen is one of five special events!"

"This isn't fair! I didn't know half these questions!"

"And is it fair of God to condemn someone to an eternity of torment just because they don't trust a Christian church pastor?"

"YES IT IS FAIR, YOU FUCKING SATANIST, A MAN OF GOD IS--" Lisa would have continued screaming when everything suddenly changed, again.

Chrissi was no longer standing by her but instead by the brief cases. The podiums had disappeared, as well as Lisa's blouse and skirt. The string bikini underneath barely covered anything, Lisa panicked. She covered her crotch with her right hand while covering her B-cup breasts with her left arm. A single tear started down her face as she tried to console herself that at least she got to keep wearing her slightly-uncomfortable shoes.

"Wow, looks like I touched a nerve there. Didn't think we would have to activate the Bracelet so soon." Jack then chuckled and the audience joined in.

"So Lisa, Now that we've established that you are dumber than Chrissi, the game can now begin properly! And I have to ask, Do you still want to go with Case number five?"

"Ah, what... Sure, why not?"

Authors Notes:

I felt that I could have some fun explaining the rules of a modified bimbo or billionaire game further. I'm guessing it's just me but I do like how the original Bimbo Or Billionaire stories were built on top of the gameplay mechanics of Deal or No Deal.

I also believe that EVERYONE should add their own chapter and turn Lisa Saint into a sexy version of a leftist/queer stereotype. If you've heard some clips from far-right content creators, you might have some ideas. If you haven't, here are some suggestions: Transsexual Incubus, Non-binary SuperSoldier, Designated Breeder for an Interracial Polycule, and Transhumanist Whore. I have my own idea, which I will hopefully work on...