A voice speaks before you

"Greetings, mortal. I have noticed that you have taken great care to heed notice of me. This pleases me greatly, and I shall now pronounce you my chosen warrior. Go forth, and spread greatness in my name!" You look around, but it seems that only you have noticed this voice.

"Also, when if you ever come down here do make sure to stop by and enjoy my ukulele playing - it's to di-" the voice gets cut off as a much more feminine voice interjects, "now dear, I'm sure they would just love to hear your playing - at least until they've heard it once."
"Whatever do you mean, love? My playing is wonderful!" You begin hearing rather poor ukulele playing over what now seems to be a connection.
"I do apologize for my husband's misconduct." You abruptly hear both connection and poorly played music cut out.