weird things happen

Max woke up and squinted. He looked at his alarm clock in the light of the sun streaming into his bedroom window. It was three minutes past noon. He couldn't believe his mom let him sleep in so late, and he couldn't believe he actually slept in. He crawled out of bed and rubbed his eyes. He put on a pair of camoflauge cargo shorts and a black t-shirt with a drawing of a red dragon on it. He yawned and stretched and went into the bathroom. After a long piss, he splashed cold water on his face, toweled off and ran a comb through his hair.

As Max walked down stairs, he noticed he felt a bit light headed, and chalked it up to no breakfast. He walked into the kitchen.

"Suprise!" yelled his mom and sisters.

"'Bout time you got up, sleepy head!" said his mom.

"Guys, I said don't do anything for my birthday!" said Max.

"Don't be such a spoil sport!" said Morgan. "Sit down and open your presents!"

"If you really wanted to suprise me," thought Max thinking of Morgan, "you'd call your hot friend Rachel and beg her to give me a lap dance!"

He sat down and his other two sisters put presents in front of him on the kitchen table. Then her heard Morgan on her cell phone.

"Rachel? Morgan. Could you PLEASE come over here and give my brother a lap dance for his eighteenth birthday?" she said.

Everyone looked at Morgan like she was crazy, especially Max.