You have to solve this mystery! But first...

"Ahhhh. Mmmmmf... Ahhhhh..."

"Thunderbird...! Damn it, I thought your excuse for watching this trash was because you needed to find out some secret about this! I can't even hear what you're saying over you!" Snowball snaps at you as Dr. Rainbow's delicate tongue washes up and down your slit. Whether Doc is doing it on purpose or not, she is making you absolutely ride the edge... partly because she can't help but start jamming her hand up under her own skirt at the same time.

"Dr... Doc.... Doctor Rainbow! Stop, stop! Pause the video for a second!" you gasp and gently push Dr. Rainbow away with one booted foot.

"Snowflake!" you say sharply. "...That's a good point. I wasn't thinking to use my power to enhance the sound for everybody, just myself. But I thought that you would be more concerned with the fact that that magical enhancer that I fingered into you earlier was actually Raven Woman's spit."

"WHAT?!" Snowflake's eyes shoot wide open. "Augh! You tricked me into that?!"

"No, I figured it out just now." you say. "Hey, you should look on the bright side. There's much more disgusting things of hers that it could've been. Seeing her use it here, I'm pretty sure that Raven Woman considers the ability of her saliva to enhance other people's superpowers to be a side effect of its main use as an aphrodisiac, instead of the other way around."

"Does that mean... that Thunderbird DIDN'T accidentally-on-purpose give her team members ****?!" Dr. Rainbow gets a huge, sunny smile on her face, and starts clapping her hands gleefully. "Yay! That's absolutely wonderful! It was just an all-natural supplement, not a ****! It means that Thunderbird was able to learn a valuable lesson with no risk of addiction or other harm d-"

Dr. Rainbow catches herself in mid sentence, and meaningfully glances at Snowflake, and her (still flat and toned, for the time being) midriff, as she remembers why Snowflake had checked these sordid breeding videos out in the first place. "Oh. Sorry, Mx. Snowflake."

"Anyway, Snowflake, I think this is gonna just be Starburst making pretty much the same noises I was." you say. "It doesn't seem like this is something Raven Woman planned ahead of time. To be honest, what's gonna happen next in this video is basically my fault. But there are a lot of little things about how Raven Woman is approaching this that are making me suspicious, considering what Queen of Hearts said during our interrogation-slash-much-needed-dental-appointment." you say.

"Suspicious how?" Snowflake asks. Needless to say, she ignored your request to pause the video despite the remote being in the seat right next to her.

"Oh, right, you weren't there for that either." you sigh, starting to lazily rub yourself now that Rainbow's gotten distracted. "It was hard to tell because I'm not fluent in psychopathic babble, but Queen of Hearts implied that Raven Woman is benefiting somehow from making other superheroines get pregnant."

Snowflake just stares silently for a few moments with her typical surly expression. "That's fucked up. You don't need me to explain gender theory in order for you to understand how fucked up that is, right, Thunderbird?"

"When you're right, you're right, Snowflake." you nod. "I just don't know how. But considering that little magical imp guy who Red Balloon broke loose, and that both she and I signed a contract with, I think it might be a Rumpelstiltskin thing.

"A what?" Snowflake looks at you quizzically.

"Like, the fairy tale? It's a pretty classic one." you say.

"My parents didn't rely on outdated, misogynoir, Eurocentric propaganda." Snowflake says sternly.

You roll your eyes and groan. "You've got the internet, go look it up on on an online enclyopedia on your own time. Anyawy, Raven Woman probably signed a similar deal with Mr. Magopolis that I did. Misfortune for others, fortune for yourself." you say.

A frustrated groan comes from your throat. "But there's still many unanswered mysteries. Like, why did Raven Woman **** Queen of Spades' husband, King? And why did she make him un-alive himself? It doesn't make any sense." you start rubbing yourself faster. "Nnngh! I'm too horny for a mystery like this, but the only way I can possibly get to the bottom of it is watching something that will make me more horny."

"You can do it, Thunderbird! I believe in you!" Dr. Rainbow says cheerfully as she plops down into the seat next to you, her hands immediately slipping down to your inner thighs. "I know that the power of friendship and teamwork will always prevail over any dark schem-"

"SHHH!" you clamp your hand over Dr. Rainbow's mouth, as your eyes bulge out. "That sound! The static! Do either of you hear that?"

Dr. Rainbow and Snowflake both look surprised, and shake their heads.

...

You look up at the screen. Starburst has hiked her leg up against the wreckage of a car. A black barrier (presumably magical) surrounds the site of the clash now, blocking out Starburst, Raven Woman, and Jack of Hearts from the rest of the city, as a sort of privacy screen. In the focus of the camera is a close-up of Starburst's lower body, focusing on the way her fingers rub over the slit visible through her spandex shorts as she moans and gasps softly. "Mmmf... I want... I want something more than this... and if daddy is going to be a prude and embarrass me like that... maybe I shoud..."

But behind Starburst, a couple dozen paces away, Raven Woman can be seen talking to Jack of Hearts. Jack is still bound up against that lamppost, unable to move. He gives an occasional nod of understanding. Thanks to Starburst's breathy moans and gasps, the dialogue between Raven Woman and the peculiar henchman is muted and drowned out.

Or at least, it would be to most people. For someone with your super-powered hearing, enhanced far beyond its already impressive acuity, separating and picking out their words should be easy, even from an anachronistic VHS-quality tape.

...except you can't. Because a sonic antiphase has been carefully edited into the film. Most wouldn't hear it, but to you, it is a constant low-level hum of static, covering up everything that Raven Woman and Jack say.

And then, there is a jump cut in the film. It's sudden and awkward - which is strange, since normally, Smut King's directing skills are excellent, and he is able to make every shot transition seem smooth and natural. Starburst is grinning mischievously as she does her best imitation of Raven Woman's sultry, hip-swaying walk as she approaches Jack of Hearts tied to the lamppost. Raven Woman is no longer anywhere to be seen in the video.

...

"This porn video has been altered!" you shout, pointing a finger dramatically. "Altered in a very specific way! There are exactly two people in the entire League who an edit like that would even matter for: me, or my mom. I have to go down there to the archives right now and beat some answers out of Smut King!"

Snowflake looks mortified. "But... wait a second! This... that man on there has... he... I need to know more about him, damn it! Considering what happened! There might be something Starburst says that will help me track him down!"

You cross your arms over your chest. "Red Balloon could finish up with Shush at any time and go to Maiden America and get me suspended, you know."

"That's a risk I'm willing to take." Snowflake says.

You sigh and roll your eyes. "Are you ACTUALLY getting excited to watch this? You know what's gonna happen next, right?"

"The camera head guy won't open his archives unless you're returning the videos. And I checked them out." Snowflake says in a challenging tone. "So either press play, or we can have our rematch right now."

"Jesus, fine." you say with a weary sigh. "We can watch another naive heroine get turned into a twinkie if you want to so much. You horny bi... hmm... Doc? What's the proper epithet to call a gender-neutral person instead of bitch? Slut? I'm pretty sure slut is a gender neutral term now."

Dr. Rainbow pouts slightly. "I don't approve of-"

"Slut it is." you say, hiking your legs up on the arms of the chair and grabbing Dr. Rainbow's shoulder to shove her face back into your bikini zone.