Therapy with Dr. Humpalot

With time off from fighting and other more covert activities, Adam had scheduled an appointment with Dr. Heather Humpalot. Despite being renown by many people as a sex therapist, she had also been quite helpful to other individuals as a regular therapist.

Despite mostly recovering from the traumas he'd suffered during his mercenary days, there were times Adam occasionally felt relapses (primarily PTSD and 'phantom pain'). Though he'd spoken with military psychiatrists during his time in the SAS, and after some of the black ops he'd been in, Adam hadn't felt like he could be really open with them.

"Thanks for being on time, Mr. Higbee. Please have a seat," Dr. Humpalot replied as the former mercenary walked in. Clad in a dark blue blazer and knee-length skirt that hugged her curvy body, she was astonished to see the soldier dressed in a regular shirt and jeans, his face devoid of makeup.

"Thanks, Doc. People say you're the person to talk to when there's difficulties, and I just needed somebody to talk to."

"That's kind of you to say. What seems to be the problem?"

"Well, I don't know how much of my past you know about, but one of the earliest things I fought in when I was in the SAS was the first Liberian Civil War. You know of it, right?"

"Late 80s-early 90s conflict in Northern Africa. I've heard of it."

"Well, it was about a year before it ended, me and a select group o' four other soldiers were sent in to help out. Completely off the record, you know? Like the line from the 'Mission Impossible' show: 'If you die, we'll deny this mission existed', or some shit like that. This was the first REAL conflict I'd been in, unnerstand; my first mission with the squad had been a year ago, and that had zero casualties. This was the real thing."

"So, in other words, you'd had plenty of training, but no real combat experience."

"Precisely. Well, difficulties occurred, and we got cut off from HQ. No flares, radio or anything. Our field commander figured if we could get to a military base, we'd be safe; unfortunately, the nearest base was a three-day hike.

Food wasn't a challenge; we had enough supplies for two days, plus, we knew what plants and animals would be safe for consumption. It was on our second night that somethin' happened that basically made me 'grow up'." Adam paused for a moment to take a drink of water.

Heather slid closer to Adam. "It's okay. I'm here for you. Go on."

Adam took a deep breath. "When campin' for the evening, we'd set up watches in four-hour shifts. During the shift right before mine, I was half-asleep when I heard a noise that disturbed me. I've always been a light sleeper, so moving quickly, I got up and had my USP out."

"The soldier who was like a brother to me (I'll call him 'Ricky' to protect his anonymity) was dead. No, that's puttin' it mildly: Ricky had been butchered. His throat had been cut in a ragged manner; the sound of him tryin' to scream for help was what woke me. I'd seen corpses in movies before, but not in real life. That's when I saw his killer.

It was a little kid; couldn't have been more than 10 years old, and he was standing over Ricky, a sharp-toothed knife in his hands. He was really pale, with long hair, but I'll never forget the look in his eyes. They were haunted, like a serial killer.

I didn't think, I just reacted, fired a single bullet into his skull. It was unlike anything I'd ever experienced. I know they say everybody feels awful when they kill for the first time, and that's how I felt. The gunshot woke up the other three guys.

After tellin' them what happened, and we buried both Ricky and the kid, we moved on, eventually gettin' to the base. We began to get engrossed in the fighting, and eventually, I began to get more focused, more in control of myself. I'd completely forgotten about the kid until recently. The last couple of weeks, I've been having nightmares about Ricky's ****, but instead, I'm the one the kid comes after."

Dr. Humpalot remained silent for a few moments. She'd heard all sorts of stories from various clients, but Adam's calm, rational, Robert Shaw-like way of telling this story had to have been (for him) the equivalent of exorcising a long-ago locked-away demon.