The rabbit gets caught?

Jenna made her way through the woods, not daring to look back as she ran for her life. All she needed to do was find someone, anyone who would help her. She wasn't sure how far or how long she ran, but she found herself in need of a break. Her wedding dress was already ripped and tattered in places where it had caught on various branches, thorns, and cockle burs. The woods were definitely no fun for a person of her stature and importance! She was going to complain to daddy about getting lost in the woods, and he'd see to it they'd be leveled, and turned into luxury condos.

Once she caught her breath, and felt some strength returning, she trudged on through the woods. However the tree roots must have sensed her malevolence toward them, and they began to play tricks on her, springing up out of nowhere to cause her to trip and stumble. Her dress became even more tattered as tree branches seemed to reach out and grab hold of it. "Fuck this place!" she shouted as loud as she could. It was then she noticed the lack of sound. Her voice didn't even echo. Why was it so quiet?

She fought her way through some thick, heavy brush, tearing her dress even more. Pieces of it were now claimed by several raspberry bushes she had plunged through. But once she made it through the brush and bushes, she found herself at the edge of a nice little clearing. On the other side of the clearing sat a cabin. It was a quaint looking place. Something like you'd see in a Norman Rockwell painting, or the focus of a Currier and Ives print. It was that rustic. But being in need of help, she realized beggars couldn't be choosy. She trudged across the clearing, right up to the porch, and banged profusely on the front door.

"Hold yer britches!" yelled a voice from inside. "I'mma comin'!"

"Zeb, it's probably them revenuers, come again to take our still!" said an older female voice. "I'mma gettin' ma gun, and I'mma gonna blast me some revenuer rumps with rock salt!"

"Now hold on there Granny! I ain't even opened the door yet," the person named Zeb said as he tried to calm her down. "May not even be revenuers. You don't wanna go wastin' good rock salt for nothin'! Now just simmer down, and let me take a peek." He put his hand on the door knob, and slowly turned it. "I was gonna go hunt up some rabbit for dinner any way."

Jenna stood there, transfixed on the slowly turning knob. She wasn't sure whether she should stand there and wait, or run for her life. The person this Zeb character had called Granny sure sounded mean! She swallowed hard, and held her ground as the door began to open. "I'm glad I wore my sneakers!" she thought to herself, as she prepared to make a quick getaway.

When the door flung open, there before her stood what could only be described as a major country bumpkin, or a hillbilly, if you prefer. The man before her was older than her. His hair was peppered with grey, and he had a nice growth of stubble on his face. He wore a pair of faded, but well patched jeans, an old style thermal shirt, a beat up old stetson, and a raggedy old sport coat. He also carried a rifle slung over his right shoulder. He smiled at Jenna. "Well, well, well," he began."What do we have here?" He looked back into the cabin. "Granny, you can relax. I ain't never seen no revenuer dressed up for a wedding before. Not like this girl." He turned his attention back to Jenna. "Why don't you come on in here, and sit a spell? Take a load off."

"No, I'd rather not take off anything, if you don't mind," she said, misunderstanding what he meant. "But I will come in."

Zeb moved off to the side, and scratched his head. "You city folk sure are a might bit peculiar."

As she entered the cabin, there before her, sitting in a rocker sat the one she was sure Zeb called Granny. And Granny had an old double barrel shotgun pointed right at her.

( Disclaimer: No rock salt was shot into anyone's rump during the writing of this chapter. However, the Ents in the forest did enjoy getting even with Jenna for cursing them. They only wish they could have torn more of her dress off. They do miss the Entwives very much, which means they haven't seen a naked lady in, like, forever. Well, except for the Playboys that occasionally get left out in the woods by accident. But that's another story for another time.

Any similar events, either real or fictional, are purely coincidental. )