The Hell weeks.

On the good side, between my job, keeping the house in order, minding the kids, and everything else, I'm so busy that I don't really have time to think about it. But after the kids had been tucked in, and the house given one more sweep for any messes that couldn't be left until the morning, when I turn over in bed and see that empty spot next to me, and smell his leftover scent, it makes my chest hurt bad.

After kid number 2 was born, Rancher and I had another talk. We had both agreed that we didn't want our kids to be raised by a nanny or a sitter, and that we'd rather one of us be around for them at all times. But our current working conditions didn't allow that. So, he decided to find a higher paying position in his company, while I looked about how I could work from home more. Naturally, this meant he spent more time at work, which also unfortunately meant that he'd be traveling for conferences and stuff. Most of the time, he'd be gone for a couple of days, 4 max, but for every so often, he would be gone for about a week.

I love my kids. They are the most important things in my life, and I will fight you 7 ways from Sunday if you dare think otherwise, but sometimes, they do make me want to rip my hair out. Especially when I have to deal with them solo. The tea-time gab seshes with my girlfriends, while all our kids are either playing together, watching their favourite cartoon, or napping, are a God send for my sanity. But there's something you need to know about my girlfriends.

They usually have the best intentions at heart, but dear God above if they don't turn into harpies. When Rancher's away for that long, some of them, the real bitchy ones that can't get anything further than a hook-up, don't waste a second before trying to convince me that him going away for work is just a lie, and that he's really gone to get his dick wet with his side chick behind my back, while leaving poor ol' me to deal with everything at home. I have tried so God-damned hard to convince them that I have zero fear or worry of him being unfaithful, but they just won't listen. If there was some way I could get them to see that if they went for different men (a.k.a. not assholes), they'd actually find some way to be happy. It takes every smidge of my control to keep my mouth shut, smile and nod politely while they spew their venom, and then just leave it at the door when I see them off, so that I don't bring/keep that energy to my home.

I also have to milk myself especially thoroughly when I meet up with one of them in particular. Rancher mentioned to me once that my milk gets a very bitter note to it if I spend too much time around her, and my family does not deserve bad milk because she can't bear not spreading her hate to others. (I'd have thought it would taste more salty than bitter, but that's just me)

For... anonymity's sake, let's call her... QB. Now, QB is one of , if not, THE hottest woman I've ever met in my life. The "men will crash their cars into a wall if it'll get her to look in their direction" level of hot. She also knows that she is, and knows how to use it. She has a drop dead gorgeous figure and perfectly sculpted face that cost a small fortune to create, that she makes back by posting saucy pics of herself online. Most of them taken on her weekend every other month holiday overseas in some of the most beautiful spots in the world.

Unfortunately, she's also the same level of Bitch. She expects the World to throw themselves at her feet, and when even the smallest thing doesn't go her way, she blows up. The limo that was supposed to pick her up from the airport was a Merc instead of a Beemer? She will scream, turn around, buy the next flight back, put it on her socials that whoever it was that hired her had mistreated her, and then block them. Her bikini for the shoot was a shade off-colour? All of the bikinis are on fire now. The triple-cream-choco-mint-soy-latte-with-extra-caramel-shot was served in the standard to-go cup, instead of being automatically upgraded to the limited edition one, free of charge? There is no amount of money in the world that could make that kind of verbal **** worth it. Her multitude of ex's? The ones that let her have her way are pushovers that turn her off, and the ones that push back are controlling, sexist, misogynist pigs. If they try to have sex with her when she isn't in the mood, or turn her down when she is, are simultaneously rapists and gays that deserve to be lynched in the street. I do have my suspicions as to how she's managed to avoid having kids with any of them, but I really do thank God for that.

I don't know if she realizes she does this, but she's done with them, she doesn't just dump them. She kind of ends up leaving some sort of permanent damage to them too. The last guy she had was a mid-name football player I think, who could have gotten big in a couple of years, but last I heard, he's a resident in the funny farm, because the cops found him locked in his own bathroom, huddled in the corner, mumbling to himself that a giant hedgehog called Spiny Norman was out to get him.

And to top it all off, she has the audacity to whine and complain, that the men she interacts with, are only interested in her for her body and her looks, and not her absolute gem of a personality.

You might then be asking why I keep spending time with QB, and Rancher would really rather I cut her out of our lives completely but... I'm a sucker for Drama. This girl is like the blackhole of Drama. It's too entertaining to watch her keep riding on this self-destructive cycle, and I'm just waiting for the day it all goes tits up for her. Yes, I will be sad that whatever is going to happen to her happened, but it is going to be so deliciously deserved when it does. Also, to be less vindictive, she is the best example for me, as someone to not be. Whenever a dubious idea pops in my head, I think to myself, _"_is this something QB would do?" And if the answer is "Yes", I do the opposite.

That's been working out pretty damn well for me so far.

Anyway, good news, she's off on another shoot this week, so no risk of flavor contamination; but also bad news, that meant I didn't have to milk myself, so my tits are a little backed up and sore; but even better news, Rancher just texted saying that he's boarding the plane now, and it'll only be another 6 or so hours before he's back home with us. Yay!