That's absurd.

"That's absurd." Gregory understood that all of the evidence pointed towards Jennifer's conclusion, but his rational mind refused to accept such an outlandish claim. "That's impossible."

Jenn shrugged. "Everything that's happening to me is absurd. Speaking of which, you must be into energetic girls, because I feel more awake than I ever have. What else do you like?"

"I don't know. I like women who get upset about magic changes to their body," Gregory said. Jenn laughed at this.

"You can lie to yourself, but you can't lie to whatever's happening to me. I think if you really wanted me worried, I'd be worried. Come on, fess up. You like this!"

"Fine," he grumbled. "Who wouldn't enjoy seeing their fantasy materialize in front of them?"

Jenn clapped her hands and giggled. "See, now we're getting somewhere! So other than your teacher's lipstick, mammoth tits, and a lower voice, what do I have to look forward to?"

Gregory ran his hand through his hair and sat down. "I don't know. Hot girls, ok? I like hot girls."

"No shit," Jenn smirked. She sat down next to him and rubbed his back soothingly. "Let's start with what I'm doing right now. I'm trying to make you feel better because I care about you. I think I'm a much ****, more empathetic person now."

"Temporarily," Gregory added pointedly. She nodded.

"Right. And I already told you I have way more energy. I wonder if my cognitive functions have changed..."

Gregory let out a choked sob at that. "Jesus Christ, did I fucking lobotomize you? This is a nightmare!"

"If anything, I'm probably smarter." Jenn didn't necessarily believe this, but she needed to say it. "Don't worry about that. Now, Greg, I've noticed something that I suspect may help with this."

He looked at her, hope brimming in his eyes. "What? What is it?"

Jenn shrugged, marveling at how long her chest kept moving from the motion. Her bra had long disappeared. "I pointed this out earlier, and I've been mulling it over since then. You know, when this first started happening, part of me was freaking out. That little voice that said I need to try to reverse this got quieter and quieter, and now it's gone completely."

Greg shook his head. "That's so fucked up..."

Jenn shook her head. "I disagree! I like it, I enjoy my whole identity being fucked with. And if I like it..."

He stared at the floor for a moment. Jenn waited patiently for him to connect the dots, and right on cue his eyes widened and he stared at her in horror.

"You think I like this?" he spat. "Why would I want this to be happening? I don't even fucking know you! I don't-"

Jenn put a finger to his lips and stroked his hair soothingly. "Greg, buddy, you can lie to yourself but you can't lie to me. Or to what I'm becoming, at least. You can deny it all day, but if you wanted me to be myself I would too. To be honest, all of this is kind of turning me on. I don't think that's part of the original Jenn recipe."

"I- look, it's-" Gregory's voice was rising with panic as he sputtered defensively. "I can't help what my subconscious is doing! I'm not a monster!"

"Of course not," Jenn said. "This whole situation was thrust on you. You're not responsible for any of this."

Gregory cast his eyes down and started to mumble a response but Jenn put her hands on his face and raised it to meet her gaze. "Gregory," she said, "I want you to look at me. Look into my eyes. You are not responsible for this. This. Is. Not. Your. Fault. Say it for me."

"This is not my fault," he repeated weakly. She demanded he repeat it several times, only letting go when she heard some actual conviction creep into his tone.

"Now, are we clear on this?" Jenn asked. "No more self-flagellation or ethical anxiety?" Gregory nodded silently and she sighed with relief.

"Thank God, because your fantasy women is incredibly horny. Ready to take care of your girl?"