Tell your best friend about your powers

The next day approaches and I head over to my best friend Roman’s house. I have to tell him about this. It would be a sin not to. Not only because not telling anyone about this would probably make me explode, but I’m pretty sure that we agreed that if anything like this happened to either of us, the first thing we’d do would be to tell each other. Now, while it was most definitely an elementary school pact and it’s most definitely been broken seeing that it’s not the first thing I did, I guess I'm still obligated to go through with telling him about it. He’s like my other brother who won’t judge me if I tell him everything about my new...Power? Blessing? Miracle? Whatever the hell this is. It’s sure as hell not a curse. There’s legitimately no downside to this.

I pull up in Roman’s driveway, parking my car before stepping out and heading over to his door. I knocked on the door, using the super awesome knock that we created. But not even halfway through the knock, the door jerks open, revealing Katelyn, rubbing her head in annoyance. Oh, goody.

“What the fuck is your problem?” she says in a groggy tone,

“Well, excuse me for being chipper on this fine morning,” I retort,

“Oh, spare me. You just wanted to be an annoying shitsack. You do realize people have things to do? Nobody wants to hear your dumbass knocking this early.”

“It’s 11:36, you clearly just woke up, and you’re in short shorts and a tank top. Who are you fooling?”

“Ugh. You’re such a pain. Can’t wait until school starts again for you so that you’re out of my hair.”

“Oh, you mean you can’t wait until Roman and I go back to school, while you’re stuck trying to find somewhere else to live?”

“Go fuck yourself.” She said as she give me the finger.

"Don't mind if I do" I said.

Before I can say anything else, she slams the door right in my face before stomping off. Unbeknownst to the dumb broad, she forgot to lock the door. She is going to pay for this.

I politely let myself in, closing the door before making my way upstairs to Roman’s room. Once I’m right by his door, I hear something all too familiar. Something that anyone living with a guy past his teens would instantly recognize. The sweet wholesome sound of a woman walking on hot coal, while playing paddleball.

Deciding to be the most considerate best friend ever, I remove my ear from the door, step away, and then turn the doorknob, pushing the door open, calmly saying,

“JESUS IS WATCHING YOU!!!”

He shrieks before tossing his phone from his lap all the way across the room and covering himself with his blanket. I laugh hysterically from his reaction, hearing him groan in agitation. He makes himself presentable before retrieving his phone.

“Oh, thanks, dickhead,” he pouts, “I’ve always wanted a crack in my screen.”

I calm down from my laughing fit before saying,

“Hey, no one told you to Tom Brady your phone. You made that decision all by your lonesome.”

“Don’t blame my reflexes on me. I’m still getting used to having my own place.”

“With your bitchy older sister, might I add?”

“Hey, she might be a bitch, but that’s just surface level. You haven’t gotten to know her like I have. Deep down, she’s a sweet, loving, caring, selfless-”

“Sexy bimbo who’s willing to do any and everything and film it and sucks at hiding the files, giving access to her scummy brother who spanks it to her.”

“...I mean, when you say it like that, it sounds perverted.”

“You mind telling me how you’d put it?”

“...What do you want, Chad?”

I chuckle before shutting the door and walking to the other side of the room to ensure that I’m not heard, barely able to contain my excitement.

“Ok,” I start in a whisper, “I want you to listen to me and listen carefully without judging me.”

“I will make no such promises,” he replies,

“Whatever. I don’t care. Cause I’m gonna tell you something, then I’m gonna prove it.”

“Alright, just tell me what it is already. You’re starting to scare me. Do you have a rare bowel infection or something?”

“Nope. Gross, but nope. I just so happened to come across the greatest superpower of all time.”

“Burping your ABC’s?”

“What? No.”

“Jogging backwards upstairs?”

“No.”

“Pronouncing wichchcher sauce?”

“I’m just gonna tell you.”

“That would save some time. Thank you.”

“Ok, to keep it brief...I can switch bodies.”

His look of anticipation switches into a look of discontempt.

“See? Right now you don’t believe me,” I say,

“Yeah, that’s a pretty weird way to advertise Michael’s weed,” he says,

“What?”

“I get it. It was good weed. Should’ve taken your word for it. Now I’m stuck without it. Just let me have some already since you’re just gonna be a douche about it.”

"Ok, first of all, that’s not even true. His weed sucked ass. And our friendship means too much for me to have you go anywhere NEAR that garbage. And secondly, I can actually prove it.”

“Well, thank you for your consideration. Maybe this’ll teach you to trust my intuition next time. And just for that, I’ll bite. Go ahead. Show me. Float about to another vessel. You have my attention.”

“Oh-...uh...see, um...here’s the thing-”

“Oh, what’s wrong? I’m waiting. Go ahead and ‘swap bodies’.”

Ok, he’s lucky we’re friends. Otherwise, I’d have just dropped my pants and did it right in front of him and made him suck my **** dick for being such a douche. But I’m a good friend, and I'm not into guys, so I won’t do that.

“Alright, look,” I start, “The way it works is a bit-...in a word, unorthodox. So I’m gonna go to the bathroom for a bit.”

“Sure,” he says, sarcastically, “Do what you need to do, ya poltergeist.”

This is gonna be so satisfying. I step inside of his bathroom and shut the door, tearing some tissues away from the roll and sliding my pants and briefs to my knees. I then take a breath, shutting my eyes and letting my mind wander.

Now who to jerk it? It must be someone that will shock Roman the most.