Take a rain check

A party does sound fun, especially with all the drama of the last week or so but you just can’t. Even if Mandy or one of her goons isn’t there to attempt an ambush it is still going to be too dangerous. All it takes is one frat boy trying to be funny by jacking off into a drink and you are dead! And that’s to say nothing of if you end up having one too many drinks and stumble into someone’s bed. That is your usual modus operandi after all.

And then there’s the fact that in your current state you are terribly **** to GAMEs. Imagine if a NO PLAY condition was merely tasting sperm?!

All these risks are like a weight pressing down on you. Your heart tightens to think about it. No, better to stay indoors and concentrate on your routine of University work and sports until you have things a bit better worked out in your head.

You give Diana your reasons for declining the invitation which she accepts without too much fuss and that Friday you have a quiet, and very safe night in.

And so it goes for the rest of the year. There’s always a better reason to stay in than go out, always a good excuse to keep to yourself than meet new people. And ultimately if anyone asked, you could always point to the GT and the ever-present **** GAME; your own personal Sword of Damocles.

As the year goes on you become more reclusive. You hang out with your dorm-mates of course and still attend lectures and the gym but you are always sure to travel with others and keep one eye open for Mandy. Other than that though, parties, romantic liaisons and socialising generally becomes a memory. There’s always after graduation and after Shoubu University for all that you tell yourself.

Friends you socialised with through drinking and hook ups are the first to fall away and then study buddies who want to meet up outside your dorm house. Eventually your only real friend at University is Diana, but she spends most of her time at her girlfriend’s.

As for Mandy, from what you hear she’s happy enough with Aurora. Diana says that she most likely was never really interested in sex with boys or girls so much as getting off to powerplays and dominating others. Now with a compliant bimbo to do her bidding sexually she isn’t missing being penetrated herself much anyway. In fact the GAME gives her a good excuse to tease guys without having to put out at all. And she is gracious enough that, as long as you’re willing to stay indoors and out of her way, she’s willing to tolerate you still being alive.

In the end you miss most of the weirdness and experiences your third year of Shoubu had to offer.

After graduation you find that after living with an underlying fear for so long, your confidence has taken a severe knock. Despite the repeated promises to yourself that in the outside world when freed from the GAME you were going to go wild with a line of hot guys it never really happens. You have developed a deep social anxiety and fear of sex. In the end it is over two years after graduation before you are ready for any kind of sexual relationship again. You find yourself sticking to plain guys you don't find super attractive but are safe. You avoid any with a hint of a needy ex.

But at least you graduated, with a good degree you can be proud of as well. And most of all you SURVIVED!