Summer job options!

Sure enough, despite a frantic evening searching, your purse and its precious contents were nowhere to be found.

In the end, you also ended up being too shy to even admit any of this had happened to your parents. You ended up telling them that you dropped your phone into a sewer grate. Rather than being upset, your father seemed like he was all too pleased to have an opportunity to gently suggest that you ought to get a job for the summer - offering you an advance for a replacement is long as you promised to look for one.

The initial options on offer proved to be extremely disappointing. First you had applied for a maid service but your enthusiasm quickly died when it became clear that this particular company was less interested in you standing around and looking cute in a anime style maid dress and more interested in your abilities to scrub grout and clean disgusting refrigerators. By the time you applied for some of the positions around the campus itself, they had all already been filled. In your frustration, you had applied for a job stocking shelves at the local grocery that was way below your intellect, but while you were showing off your ability to lift a box full of juice bottles you ended up dropping the whole thing thanks to your stubborn clumsiness and being asked to leave.

It is now a week into summer break and you've still got nothing. A regional anime convention is coming up in just five weeks and you will be so bitterly disappointed if you don't get to enter the cosplay contest after coming within a hair's breadth of winning a year ago.

You sit slumped in front of your laptop, having just finished complaining of your plight to someone on Omegle and having only been asked to send naked pictures of yourself instead of any genuine sympathy. Quite frankly, at this point, the choice of summer job Lola and those other tart it up girls had been going with was looking awfully appealing. But it was fear, not of the customers themselves but of the apparently zealous police in this college town, that stopped you from putting yourself back out there. You would simply die from embarrassment if your parents found out you had been arrested, especially for something like that.

Furthermore, the problem of having used dating apps for so many no-strings-attached hookups meant that none of the guys you knew were interested in playing Sugar Daddy for your benefit, having already gotten the milk for free as it were. And you didn't want to string some shy nerdy guy along just so he would pay your way for the convention. "Fake geek girls" were the worst, or so the internet said, and you were ever self-conscious of being labeled one. If you ever hooked up with somebody at a convention you wanted it to be out of genuine romantic chemistry, or at least attraction.

Rolling your eyes and giving a snorting chuckle to yourself as you did so, you decided to do what an old person would do and opened a copy of the campus newspaper to look at the dead tree version of the classified ads. Surprisingly, the opportunities there weren't so bad, at least at first glance.

One was pizza delivery. That was pretty lame, but the pay wasn't that bad, especially when you factored in the likelihood of tips.

Then there was a door-to-door sales gig. It was offering an impressive amount of pay on paper, but something about it struck you as being a tiny bit suspicious.

Finally there was a caretaker position at the local retirement home. That one would probably be pretty easy to get away with goofing around at. But on the other hand... old man smell, ew.

One way or the other the time has come to make a decision...