Sometimes self-acceptance requires confronting yourself

"How... do you feel about me making you do this?" I winced as I immediately regretted the words, every part of me knew this wasn't going to end well from experience... but self-sabotage was one of the only things I was good at, and my morbid curiosity got the better of me, "And I mean, if this was before I became your owner. If I was anyone else."

Emily pulled away from my cock with a wet sloppy pop, slurping up some drool from her chin and casually stroking her spit around my shaft as she suddenly looked extremely deep in thought,

"That's a bit... tough. A few different questions there for one and I mean... if you weren't my owner I wouldn't be here." Emily stated the facts as plainly as possible, "Even if you were someone else, you could've been a billionaire or a celebrity, I wouldn't just leave my family in the middle of the night to be a sex toy for anyone."

I winced but it was still a lot more tame of a reaction than I'd expected... it just... didn't feel right. She was still lying. She was being too nice.

"Yeah but like... How do you really feel? If I wasn't your owner what would you think?"

Emily stopped stroking me and screwed up her face as she tried to consider the question,

"You mean about you or this situation?"

"Both?"

"Well..." It took her a moment to really consider the words but eventually she slowly pieced them together, "I guess I thought you were a fine neighbour before... honestly I didn't think about you much, we barely even saw each other, but if you some how got me to come over here to be your toy... hmm... I guess it would depend a bit on the how, but I can't imagine a situation where I wouldn't be pissed. I wouldn't be doing this behind my husband's back that's for sure so you'd probably be forcing me into it somehow and definitely I wouldn't be a happy camper."

She gave a gentle laugh, completely dismissing the severity of her words even as they started to sour in my stomach.

"I'd probably hate you if you weren't my owner." The words came out innocent and pragmatic but they felt like a blow to my self image.

How long was I gonna **** myself like this? Right and wrong, what if's and alternate realities.... Her words stung and they felt true... but she had included the last bit, 'if I wasn't her owner.' That was the only irrefutable fact in this entire line of questioning. I latched onto that like I never had before. Somehow. I was only focusing on the conjecture... wallowing in self pity and self-loathing. Desperately wanting to do what was right when there wasn't actually a real world precedent for this whole mess.

I'd already been through this exact situation, only it was much worse the first time.This time though, maybe it was because she was nicer about it, or maybe it's because I was building a tolerance by repeatedly crossing over this line but this time, I didn't break so much as started to crack,

"I want you to pretend I'm not your owner then. Forget that I own you or anyone else."

For a moment Emily just looked up at me, her eyes almost glazing over as her brain slowly put the words together, blocking out bits of her new reality at a time, but then just as fast as it started, she blunk and then refocused on my cock, her eyes widening until I thought they might've popped out of her head as the colour started to drain from her face. It took her a few seconds to realize she was still holding my cock too and she released it like it had suddenly shocked her before she noticed the spit and started to rub her mouth,

"What the fuck? What? What am I–" She looked up at me in fear, then frustration, then... confusion? her face was a blur of emotions as she went through each of them trying to find a mask that fit, before she quickly rose to her feet as she started to gag, and spat, "I don't know how you got me to I agree to this! How I ever thought this was a good idea. I shouldn't– did you **** me or something?" She took a defensive step away from me, glaring at me like I was some monster about to attack her.

In a way she was right and somehow that felt... comforting? Maybe I was just being a sadomasochist... I wasn't sure anymore. Her words stung in away I couldn't sting myself no matter how much I repeated them in my own mind, they felt like everything I deserved... and yet I suddenly felt a burning building up from my stomach into my throat, more metaphorically than just heartburn, I was feeling a little nauseous though.

"No. You came here on your own." I put on a pained smirk as I fully stepped into the game. There was more nuance to it than that, but it was still the truth, wasn't it? She could've found another loophole... maybe....

"Bullshit! You had to have done something to me!"

"Keep your voice down." I growled, suddenly remembering the neighbours.

Immediately she flinched like a scolded puppy and though she scowled even harder she continued much more softly,

"And don't order me around, Owner! I'm not your pet or your servant!" Her voice was softer, but still filled with venom, she didn't even seem to think twice about calling me 'Owner,' either.

This was still just a game... I was practically still arguing with that nagging voice in my head, but now it had a hot form to it. Somehow that gave me confidence to push back.

"Then why'd you call me Owner?" I smirked feeling a twisted pleasure at pointing that out.

"Well that's because you told–" As she remembered my previous order, but still forgot the power that had enabled it the colour started to return to her face, a frustrated flush as she started to struggle for words. She remembered that order, probably even the entire conversation about being a free-use toy, but not why she even went along with it.

"You're getting cold feet now, but you're my toy. My plaything. You already admitted it and now you're trying to back out?"

"This isn't right. I have a family!" Emily just quietly hissed and immediately spun around and started heading for the door.

"You can't leave!" I quickly belted out an order, as I realized that her getting away could change this from a twisted game to actual problems.

Emily stopped a foot from the door, frozen before turning to me with a scowl,

"And why the fuck not?"

"I didn't make you my toy, I didn't choose this for you! I never asked to be your owner! But I am. You are my toy and you can't leave until I'm done playing with you." My heart pounded and my cheeks flushed as I gave my evil speech but that was nothing but the truth wasn't it? It wasn't hyperbole that was just the world we both woke up in, so why was she still resisting? No... why was I?

Emily's face twisted in frustration as she tried to find a flaw to my logic. The fact was I still had complete ownership of her though so regardless of what she consciously thought, her body still obeyed and she took a single step away from the door and turned back to face me, glaring daggers,

"I am not you toy! I'm not an object for whatever perverse things you have planned! I should be allowed to leave whenever I want! I don't know how you even got me to agree to this in the first place but I'm allowed to withdraw my consent whenever I want!" She had an incredibly valid point and was even within arm's reach of the door with nearly a dozen feet between us, but she wasn't leaving.

"You are an object though." I huffed, "My object! Just like every other woman in the world! And objects don't need to consent!"

Emily huffed, and puffed but she didn't have a response. And how could she? You can't argue with a crazy person. Because what I said was definitely crazy, yet it was also somehow true.

"I didn't make you that. You think I wanted to do this to you?" My voice was starting to crack, and even though I was the one that had wanted her to quiet down my voice was starting to rise, "I didn't cast a magic spell on you or **** you, this is just who you are now, the sooner you can accept that the happier you'll be!"

Emily stood stunned for a moment, jaw agape at my bold claim even though I personally felt like I was one mean word away from crying, she eventually recovered enough to spit back though,

"You're insane! Women aren't objects! I'm not an object! You can't just make me do whatever you want!"

"You wanna bet?"

"Excuse–"

"On your knees."

Immediately Emily's jaw snapped shut and she let out a horrified gasp as she dropped to the floor, still keeping her voice a much more moderate volume than me though,

"Wh-what? Why did I– How–" She now looked genuinely frightened up at me.

I couldn't help but wince, looking down at her in pity,

"It's because you're my toy." My voice dropped to her volume and it was filled with guilt and regret, "So you can either continue fighting pointlessly against that simple fact and lying to yourself, or you can just crawl over here and accept your new place."

For a good few moments we just stared at each other. Her in frustration, and outrage and me... I'm really not sure. I had just gone completely blank, but then, with some serious hesitation Emily leaned forward, bowing her head , her hair falling down and hiding her face, and she began to slowly crawl towards me.

I let out a deep breath I didn't even realize I was holding until I started panting. My heart felt like it was about to leap out of my chest... at the same time it felt like a weight had finally slipped off my shoulders. I felt exhausted like I'd just carried a mountain, I didn't feel good per se, but somehow I felt... less bad. Far less than I had since I started this crazy mess.

When Emily finally stopped at my feet, and sat back on her heels she didn't look up at me, she kept her head turn down, her hair still blocking out the sight of me.

I couldn't stop myself from smiling though. A weak, self pitying smile. I couldn't even make this decision for myself could I?

"Look up at me." I finally felt comfortable with the request, even as Emily turned her face up to glare at me, recoiling slightly as she saw my cock.

I was starting to go soft as things got a little more real than I had planned... somehow, despite the last time I tried this stunt it was even more real, but with my heart starting to settle down in my chest I started to lean into the situation more,

"See? Why do you think you obeyed me?"

"Wh– because... you said I couldn't leave until you were satisfied!" Emily snapped, struggling to understand her own motives with the facts she still had available to her.

"Then get back to sucking."

Emily grimaced and with far more hesitation than the first time, refusing to even touch me this time as she slowly put her lips around the head of my cock.

"My cock is the most delicious thing you've ever tasted." I asserted firmly. I waited until Emily gave a surprised gasp before I continued, "Well, isn't it?"

"Mmmghh... n-no...." Emily spat me out with a poorly hidden **** and stammered out a denial.

"It tastes so good because that's what your owner taste's like. It's a sign of who you belong too."

"Just shut up! I-I'm married."

"That doesn't have anything to do with being my property though."

Emily let out a frustrated grumble, unable to counter my flawless logic and simply barked,

"Let's just get this over with!" She was still hardly enthusiastic, or even dutiful, but as I altered her perception of taste she no longer seemed hesitant to very quickly work me up to full mast once again.

Soon enough even though she was **** to touch me just seconds before, she moved her hands on my thighs to keep balance as she started bobbing faster and faster. The longer she sucked the less she could hide how much she was starting to enjoy my cock. Her slurping go more noisy as drool started to literally pour down her chin.

"See? You like it for a reason."

Emily grunted angrily, slowing down considerably as I finally pointed out the state she was in. With a wet slurp she tried to clean up her drool, but there was no going back, and she clearly knew that because rather than argue she just continued to suck and slurp on my cock in a much more measured pace.

"Just wait until I cum. It's gonna taste even better than my cock to you."

Emily whimpered at that. As disgusted by me as she felt she was growing conflicted, even without the actual irrefutable knowledge she belonged to me she was beginning to crack as I gaslit her and played with her perception.

"In fact, reach down your pants and feel how wet you are."

Emily stopped bobbing her head as she slid on hand off my thigh and reluctantly shoved a hand down her tight pants.

"You're getting soaked just sucking me off." I confidently quipped.

Emily snorted at that and began to pull away, but I quickly put a hand on the back of her head keeping my cock in her mouth as I made sure the order started to take hold and her body began reacting in real time. I could soon enough start to feel her shaking.

"Now start playing with yourself, get yourself started before I fuck you next."

I immediately felt Emily's entire demeanor tighten, and to my abject horror, her jaw clench, but thankfully she seemed to have no intention of biting, she instead started to fight against my grip and pull back even harder. I felt an argument coming so I held on tight and scolded her,

"Keep sucking!"

Unable to refuse, and unaware of that fact, Emily just let out a growl and stopped her resisting to go back to bobbing, with one hand still down her pants.

I felt like a monster, but then again, Zoe had said it again and again, no matter how dark I got it wasn't the same because I owned her, right? It was a small comfort, but it was enough to keep my head in the game.

It wasn't long before Emily's sloppy, noisy head brought me to the brink, and with a growl and a firm grip on the back of her head I started to unload into her mouth.

Emily immediately gave a muffled moan, of shock and surprise and her fingers started to dig into my thigh... but she wasn't pulling away. Not even when I finally relaxed my grip, it wasn't until I asked her a question that she finally did,

"So, how does it taste?"

As if she suddenly remembered I was there, she pulled back with a jolt and started to sputter,

"A-absolutely disgusting." She couldn't even look at me as she tried to spit and sputter, but it was mostly just saliva, there was barely any cum left in her mouth to dribble down her chin.

I was curious how it even tasted to her. Was it a specific flavour personal to her? Or was her brain just firing off whatever hormones or chemicals it did whenever her tongue tasted good food but in overdrive? Maybe there was some kind of magic bypassing it all though, because nothing about this situation felt scientific.

"You can deny it if you want, but you know it's true. My cock is perfect for you in every way, because you belong to me."

Emily didn't respond, but even turned away from me I could see her brow furrow and the corner of her eye crinkle as she grimaced.

"Let's see if you can continue denying it when I pound your pussy."

"Wha – I just sucked your cock, isn't that enough?" Emily glared up at me her cheeks bright pink and conviction in her face as her **** returned, as conflicted as she was at tasting my impossibly delicious meat this was clearly a step too far for a committed woman.

"No. Now drop your pants and get on all fours."

Emily's jaw dropped and she looked stunned for just a moment before she started to hesitantly reach for her waistband,

"Are you at least going to put on a condom?"

Right, between floundering on the decision to even go through with this, and me not expecting her here the very same night I wasn't even thinking about that. Honestly, the idea of knocking her up didn't sound half bad... but that still left the other half that did, it would still be a pretty big upset to her life, and probably even mine all for the sake of some fun,

"Are you on birth control?"

I could see the hesitation in her eyes, should she lie or tell the truth? But in the end she seemed to settle on the truth,

"Yes, but that doesn't mean I want to risk getting knocked up by you! No birth control is perfect! Plus I don't know where else your dick has been!"

Right, STD's, porn fantasy's often don't touch on that either...

"Don't worry about that." I quickly ordered deciding that for now the game could continue.

Almost immediately the conflict and hesitation she had subsided. Such a simple comment from anyone else would hardly be satisfactory, but for me that was all it took. I could still tell she was **** as she slowly pulled her pants down to her thighs, just enough to bare her glistening, sopping wet pussy, and just as slowly spun around to push herself up onto her hands and knees, but she didn't have anything else to stall with.

Just as soon as she was in position I knelt down behind her and lined up my half-hard shaft with her slit. She was literally dripping wet, her pussy drooling almost as much as her mouth had the moment she tasted my cock.

"You ready to forget your husband?"

"Just shut up and let's get this over with." Emily growled.

"My cock is better than you can even imagine. You're not gonna be able to think of anything else once I start you know?"

"Do you even hear yourself?" Emily scoffed, adding quietly, "I can't believe I actually agreed to this...."

With that I pushed forward, grinding against her lips and immediately her body tensed up and she let out a squeal like she'd just been shocked, her plump and plush thighs, slick with her own juices squished around my cock, bringing it back to life.

"Wh-what?" Emily was so stunned by the sensation of even brushing against my cock that she turned to look at me in utter shock, her contempt gone and she was simply struggling to comprehend.

"I told you."

Grabbing her wide hips I pulled out from between her thighs, sliding over her lips as I did,

"W-wai–ahhh!" She started to protest again but her body was wracked with pleasure.

I pushed against her entrance,

"St-stoo – ooooh!" She squealed again as I pushed inside her dripping wet cunt.

Those were the last words she could form as soon as I started thrusting into her pussy. All that came out next was a garbled mess of squeals and moans as she fought to keep her voice down like I had told her to before. She buried her face into the floor and covered her mouth but it was just barely enough to keep her from not drowning out the sounds of our hips slapping together with every thrust. Despite her protests before she started pushing her hips back into me. I couldn't tell if it was a conscious effort or not, but she wasn't even attempting to match my rhythm she was just desperately trying to grind her plump ass against me. She truly couldn't think of anything but my cock anymore.

I didn't think it made up for what I was putting her through, but it made bouncing off her ass much easier to focus on.

Zoe had a point, was this really so bad if I could just make a woman enjoy it? While there was definitely an ethical side to the argument, this wasn't just hypotheticals anymore, in real world –

"Oh god! Cummmmmingggg!" Emily let out a cry through what was obviously through gritted teeth and a clenched jaw. Somehow she managed to keep from breaking my previous order to keep her voice down, but she was starting to toe the line.

"That's fucking right! Still think I don't own you?"

Emily didn't answer, she could only pant heavily.

"Come on! Answer me or I stop fucking you!"

"N-no!"

"No what?"

"You own me! you own my pussy! Fuck me fuck me fuck me fuck me!" She sounded like she could barely string the words together she was slurring her words, between **** gasps for air as she continued slamming her ass into me, pushing seemingly as hard as she could against every one of my thrusts.

It was getting to be more than I could actually handle. The desperation in her voice, the power over her, her soft, absolutely drenched, comfortable MILFy pussy. Hearing her moaning better than any pornstar, because for her it was for real, it wasn't much longer before I pulled her into my and let out a grunt of my own, without warning her, not that it would've mattered if I did or not, I started to flood her insides with a second wave of cum. As soon as she felt the first spurt, her pussy started to squeeze around me again as she let out a hungry moan and pushed back against me hard, nearly bowling me over with her fat ass. Just as soon as I started to reach the end of my loads though she seemed to be able to feel the cum slowing down and she started wiggling her ass and whimpering,

"Don't stop. Please. Fuck. Need... fuck...." She was sounding **** and confused.

Now that I was coming down from an orgasm, I couldn't help but compare her to a junky in withdraws. She really couldn't think of anything but my dick.