Sloth's Giant Backstory

Eve stood frozen in the dimly lit corridor, the echo of Thalia's retreating footsteps fading as the young nun stepped away.

The nun clasped her hands to her side. Her hands rested against the warm, yielding expanse of her rear, they were now unmistakably larger, softer, more obvious on her physique. Her habit, once a symbol of modesty and devotion, now felt like a cruel joke, it clinged erotically against her backside.

Nearby the sin hovered, her massive form lazily rotating in mid-air like a child’s balloon .Her spade tail flicked idly, brushing against the hem of Eve's robe.

"Mmm... told ya," she murmured again, eyes half-lidded in perpetual drowsiness. "Feels kinda good once you stop fightin' it. It feels like a built in cushion, right?."

Eve whirled on her, her facial cheeks flushed with a mix of humiliation and righteous anger.

"Enough! You've invaded my body, my home, my town—and for what? Laziness? Indifference? I need to understand you if I'm to cast you out. Tell me... who are you, really? You’re a sin, but what is your…your.”

Eve finished her sentence. “Your... backstory?"

Sloth blinked slowly, as if the request required Herculean effort to process. She yawned, stretching her arms overhead, which caused her pajama top to ride up, exposing the soft blue curve of her potbelly. "Backstory? Ugh... that's like... work. Diggin' up old stuff. Why bother? We're here now. Nap time's better."

But Eve stood firm, crossing her arms over her chest.

"If you're anchored to me, then I deserve to know. Your sisters, your origins... all of it.”

“And perhaps there’s a way to sever our bond if you slip up.” Eve thought to herself.

Sloth sighed, a long, theatrical exhale that ended in a sleepy grumble. She floated downward, settling cross-legged in the air, her enormous rear spreading out like a beanbag chair beneath her. "Fine... whatever. But make it quick. Talkin' this much is exhaustin'." She scratched at one of her goat horns, eyes glazing over as she delved into memory—or what passed for it in her lethargic mind.

"Okay, so... we're daughters of Folly.”

“Folly?” Eve questioned. “Like Erasmus?”

Sloth looked at Eve. "Mmm? Erasmus... yeah. That guy. Wrote a whole book about her. In Praise of Folly. Smart human. Funny, too. Made Mom the star of his own little show."

Eve blinked at that revelation. “Okay, tell me more.”

Sloth looked thoughtful for a moment then continued.

"Folly isn't some made-up demon queen or whatever. She's straight outta that old book. Desiderius Erasmus, 1509 or so. That guy’s a Smart dude, loved his jokes. Wrote this big satirical speech where he personifies Folly, as this goddess who gets up and praises herself. Calls herself the best thing ever. Says without her: ‘life would be miserable: no marriages, no kids, no fun, no nothing. Humans need folly to be happy.’ Too much wisdom? Just makes you sad and useless, though my sister has the monopoly on that.”

Sloth yawned, tail flicking. "Mom's the daughter of Plutus and a nymph called Youth. Nursed by Drunkenness and Ignorance. And she’s always surrounded by her crew: Self-Love, Flattery, Laziness, Pleasure, Insanity. She's witty, pompous, frolicsome. Dresses like a jester sometimes. She swipes at everyone: kings, priests, scholars, lovers, old folks, kids. Momma keeps the world spinning. She even makes fun of Christianity. She calls it the highest folly—divine madness, the kind that makes saints and martyrs."

Eve's brow furrowed. "And does she love you?”

Sloth gave a slow, sleepy smile. "Yeah. She does. In her way. She’s not smothering and she has her own thing going on but she's proud. She made us to spread her essence. Eight little extensions of her chaos.”

“But mankind had sin before you girls?” Eve questioned. “The Bible speaks of it from the beginning. Adam and Eve gave birth to Cain and Abel and from there the sins spread out. That was all before Erasmus put his pen to paper.

“Yep,” Sloth smiled. “We’re not the cause of sins. Sin has been around since…”

The sin tried to find her words. “Well, since humans figured out they could want stuff they weren’t supposed to have. Or eat. Or not do. You humans have been doing this for a long time.”

Sloth shrugged her shoulders before she continued.

“My sistahs and I well…we give it out in bulk,” Sloth continued, voice thick with drowsiness. “Like free samples at a warehouse club! Humans already had the taste for sin: gluttony, greed, envy, despair, and the others. Mom just thought, ‘Hey, why not make it easier? Why not make it fun?’ So she popped us out.”

Eve’s fingers drifted unconsciously to the curve of her hip, it was as if Sloth’s speech caused her bottom to widen even greater than before.

“Alright,” the nun said slowly. “But in Erasmus’s book… Folly talks about her companions. Laziness, Pleasure, Self-Love. They’re right there in her entourage. Isn’t that… you? And Lust? And Pride?”

Sloth smiled and put her hands to her massive hips.

“Oh yeah. Mom loved that part. She straight-up modeled us after her crew!”

She lifted one lazy hand and started counting on her fingers, the motion so slow it looked like she was moving through molasses.

“Self-Love? PRIDE was named in her honor. Flattery’s kinda Envy’s side hustle, but whatever, the two get along. Pleasure?” Sloth’s tail gave a languid flick. “She and Lust get along like two cats in a bag.”

“And Laziness…” Eve prompted.

Sloth patted her own monumental rear with obvious affection.

“Yeah me and Uncle Laziness know one another. Though I got the bigger bum than he.”

Eve blinked. “So they’re… your aunts and uncles?”

Sloth made a vague, floppy gesture with her hand. “Eh… kinda? Not blood related, obviously. More like… inspirational sources? Mom took a smidge of their personalities, cranked ’em up to godly levels, and then squeezed ’em into us girls.”

She yawned so wide her jaw popped. Eve digested this fact but made sure to continue squeezing Sloth of her information.

“You’re not demons, correct?” The nun asked hesitantly

“Heck no,” Sloth scoffed. “Demons are all fire and brimstone and contracts and all that complicated stuff. Though I hear those guys down under take a lot of inspiration from us.”

“Noted; how are you all organized then?”

Sloth paused to yawn again, her tail wrapping around her knee like a security blanket. "PRIDE and Envy came first. Then Gluttony and Greed. Then Wrath and Lust. Then me and despair. PRIDE is our bossy sister and Envy’s her yuppie.”

Eve leaned against the wall, listening intently despite the discomfort of her swelling hips pressing into the stone. Her eyes closed as another subtle pulse rippled through her lower half, adding a fraction more girt. A question resulted from this new expansion.

“And you were always like this? This big.” Eve pointed hoping that Sloth would reveal a secret to help stop her own butt expansion.

"You keep making me talk.” Sloth gurgled. “But I think arguing is worse but I don’t wanna.”

“I’ll let you rest after we’re done.” Eve said. That made Sloth smile and gladly begin babbling.

“Alright, so back in the day like way back—we were all normal-sized. And we could blend in way easier than nowadays. I mean besides our skin colors and few other tidbits on our bodies.”

“Like your ramhorns?” Eve asked.

“Like these.” The sin flicked her horns.

Sloth yawned again. "Then bam! The Industrial Revolution hits. Humans explode in numbers, cities boom, machines churn. More people means more sin, right? And we didn’t even know what to do. Then we started... changin'. Growin'. Tied to human excess, our bodies warped to match what we represent. And yeah, we keep gettin' bigger the more humans pop out babies. Population boom? We boom too."

She ticked off her sisters on her fingers, her voice droning like a half-asleep storyteller. "Me? My ass blew up first. All that factory work makin' people lazy in their off-time—sittin' around, ignorin' chores. I used to have a cute little bottom but this gal’s better.”

Eve paced, her own ass wobbling with each step, an echo of Sloth's form. "So your power grows with humanity's numbers? That's why you're here—seeking a quiet anchor while you... expand?"

“Not exactly. So… picture this. Big city. Millions of people. All stressed, all overworked, all secretly craving an excuse to just… stop. Perfect feeding ground. PRIDE got us all together, laid down a plan to get our cults into New York, had Greed curry favors, and then…” Sloth yawned.

Eve’s stomach twisted. “And then?”

“And then the exorcists showed up.” The sin sighed. “Not just the usual Vatican boys. We had Jesuits with blessed silver, Hasidic mystics, Sufi dervishes spinning circles of light, even a couple of Buddhist monks. They actually knew we were up to something. They’d been tracking the cults for months. And when we were about to pull off our plan, bang, they got us in one single night.”

“We had to get the heck out of New York or we’d be toast! And we had to leave our previous anchors behind; it's good when you’re in power but it turns out you humans don’t build spaces with our curves in mind. Well I can at least phase through things you know. But since I used up so much power and was so tied into Lisa, my anchor, I got all weak. That’s why I was so shapeless when I met you.”

Eve exhaled slowly. “So your sisters…?”

“They’re scattered. All over the continental U.S. PRIDE’s probably in L.A. or D.C. Envy’s shadowing someone important I’m guessing. Gluttony’s in New Orleans or Vegas—somewhere with buffets. Greed’s holed up in a compound in Texas or Florida or wherever the money’s at. Wrath’s tearing up the Rust Belt. Lust is in Miami or hell she could even be in New York still. Despair…” Sloth’s voice softened. “Some place in the US where it's sad.”

Eve pressed her palms to her temples. Now she needed to know one thing“And you came here because…?”

“Because this place is quiet. Small. Nobody’s looking for us here. I needed an anchor to recover. Someone who had a stable and didn’t move much and could be away from prying eyes.” Sloth gave a tired half-smile. “Also kinda pretty. Didn’t hurt.”

Eve felt another gentle swell in her hips when Sloth said that. She digested this information slowly.

“If I could just alert the right people, I can put a stop to this.” She thought to herself.