Sisterly Bond (Alexis PoV)

I wrestled with the jealousy and envy that always resulted from talking with Jake about his relationship with his girlfriend. I hope the bitch appreciated what I was doing for her. Their little fuck-fest would have been a disaster if I hadn’t planted some signposts telling him where to go and what to do.

Blowing out a full breath of air, I ran my hands through my hair. “That’s not fair,” I muttered, feeling guilty about calling his girlfriend a bitch. I didn’t know her and clearly Jake liked her so she couldn’t be all bad. I mean, he put up with me so…

I did my best to push those thoughts aside. It was pointless to think about what-ifs and regret the path not taken. We had both made choices and now we had to live with them. Jake deserved to be happy, and if this girl could give him that… Good. Besides, it would have never worked out between us. I was too horny and wild for one guy and it sounded like Jake had no interest in sharing his bed with other people—guys or girls.

Yet a part of me felt that maybe… just maybe… we could have made it work. I remembered what I felt when I was connected to Natalie. The way Thomas touched her. How she felt when they were connected. The way they looked in each other’s eyes. Communication that couldn’t be put into words yet was transferred through a hundred little things. With sex—no—with love like that, maybe I wouldn’t be so wound up. Maybe with more satisfying sex, I wouldn’t need all the fun sex.

But I liked the fun sex.

My head hurt. Plopping down on the couch, I rubbed at my temples. Something was wrong with me. Jake had mentioned something about my noise had a little piece of Natalie there. Whatever that meant. Normally I would have brushed it off, but I couldn’t shake it. This wrongness inside me came and went. It was frightening to have a little piece of you feel like it didn’t belong.

Maybe it didn’t.

I thought back to when I used my Gift on Natalie. We had pushed my Gift to the limits, connecting us on a far deeper level than I’d ever gone before. The deeper we had gone, the less distance it felt between us. It had been comforting in the moment even if there had been a nugget of fear with being so ****. Remembering what had happened, there were a few times where the distance had all but vanished. Her thoughts were mine, mine were hers. What if… What if when we separated we didn’t stitch back up together properly? That would explain Jake seeing a little bit of Natalie’s noise in mine. What if there was a bit of Natalie in me?

It would also explain some weird things happening to me lately. My sudden desire to clean up, feeling a small amount of pride when I got everything arranged in a tidy way. How focusing in my classes was a bit easier now. Hell, I was even taking notes and doing assignments earlier than the night before. The biggest change was my sex drive. It was still ramped up, but it no longer had the edge it once had. Seeing a hot guy on campus no longer had me imagining all the things I would do to him. I didn’t have a compulsive need to invite some guy home to take care of the pressing need I had. Since we'd had that moment together, I’d had a few flings but not nearly the amount I was used to.

I hated it.

I hated when that feeling of wrongness washed over me and I took a sick sort of pleasure doing something I knew, knew, I didn’t enjoy.

The sickening feeling that this was all my fault. It was my Gift that fucked with my head. Natalie may have wanted to do it, but I still was the one who went through with it. The one who lost control.

My brooding ended when Natalie stumbled in. I did a double-take. She looked like a hot mess. Natalie.

Natalie.

I was already on my feet, rushing over to her. “Natalie? What happened?” My heart was racing as I saw the state she was in. She’d been crying, eyes still red and puffy. Beyond that, her appearance. Her dress… Was she just in a t-shirt? One that didn’t cover much either. She had run all the way up here in that by the way she was huffing and puffing. She had the appearance of someone who just had one hell of a night and I found myself jealous our positions weren’t reversed.

I crushed that thought, angry at myself. What the hell was wrong with me?

I helped her inside, kicking the door closed. I got her to the couch, rushing back to the kitchen for some water. She was wiping at her face trying to stop fresh tears. Taking the glass, she downed it as I carefully took a seat next to her.

“Natalie?” I asked softly, my hand rubbing her back.

She shook her head.

Lips pressing tightly together I reached out with my Gift. She slapped it away, causing me to wince.

“Sorry,” she croaked. “Not the time.”

I puffed out my cheeks, biting back my first choice of words. Instead of saying anything, I pushed my Gift at her again. There was the briefest of moments where I felt… something. Once more, she pushed me away.

“Alexis,” she said firmly.

I ignored her. It was bullshit she was trying to ignore me. Was I that unreliable?

“You’re not.” I jerked in surprise as she answered the question I was thinking. I felt the thin connection between us as I realized my Gift had taken hold, shallow as it was. “Sorry, it’s just… embarrassing.” And I felt the embarrassment. And something more.

I frowned, scooting closer so I could hold her in a half-hug. “I’ve lived a memory of guys running a train on you. Pretty sure everything is tame compared to that.”

“Ugh. Don’t remind me please,” she said, wiping at her eyes. She looked at me and sighed. “Fine.”

And I was in. Nothing as deep as last time. No way was I going to tempt fate again. Memories and thoughts floated through my mind as I saw the world Natalie did.

How she was having trouble focusing at work. How the cute guys she interacted with made her think inappropriate thoughts. The burning desire to act on those inappropriate thoughts. A step deeper. The worries that filled her. The sensation that something was wrong.

Another step.

Memories now. How she drifted off at work, fantasizing about—

Driving to Tommy’s house, a **** need filling her.

The great, wild sex she had with the man she loved. How she used him to scratch that need that burned through her body. The annoyance and disappointment when he failed to fully satisfy her but comforted by his effort and willingness to try.

I felt a sensation of dread fill me as the memories continued in flashes. I didn’t like where this was going.

The man I’d never met yet knew him as Lucas was there. Such a cocky asshole, but a halfway decent face. He wanted me. I…hated him. The guy was an asshole, but this itch… Oh god. He was going to take me. Right there in the kitchen. The way he was touching me—

I wanted it.

The connection snapped. The recoil hit both of us, gasping as we grabbed our heads.

“Ow,” I groaned.

“Sorry,” Natalie said through clenched teeth.

I sucked in a breath, looking over to my struggling sister. “D-did you…?”

“No. No,” she said with a firm voice. I let out my held breath. If she was reacting this poorly to a little thing like that, I didn’t want to imagine what would have happened if she had gone through with it. “But I wanted to,” she finished weakly. “God, did I want to. Right there in the same house as Tommy. A room away and— I’m such a horrible person.”

“No. No, you aren’t,” I said in as powerful a voice as I could manage, hugging her tightly. I was surprised she hadn’t commented on what she got from me. She should have picked up my fears. My regret at what I’d done to us. Seeing her only confirmed my fears. By looking into her mind, I felt that little piece of me there. The one I was missing.

The piece of me she hated most.

That drive she felt when she saw a cute guy? That overwhelming desire to act without thinking of the consequences? That was me. It was tempered by the rest of her of course, but it was pulling at her the same way the little piece of her was tugging at me. Maybe she didn’t notice because she was so upset, her own feelings and confusion drowning out whatever she was getting from me. The only reason I had some clarity was because Jake tipped me off. Without him pointing it out, I would have been just as confused as she was right now.

I felt horrible. This shouldn’t have happened. It wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t let us go so deep and lost control of my Gift.

“Natalie,” I said, barely able to **** out the word. “I think I fucked up.”

Confusion ran across her face as she pulled herself up out of her misery to focus on me. Because of course she did. The moment it came to me, she became a god-damn superhero, putting off her own problems to focus on me and only me. It wasn’t fair. She was this great and wonderful person, and all I did was trip her up and hold her back.

Sniffing, she wiped her tear-streaked cheeks with the sleeve of her t-shirt. Staring at me, she was Natalie once more. The calm and collected Natalie who was there to clean up after all my messes. The sister I didn’t deserve.

“Show me.”

I was hesitant now, knowing full well what my Gift was capable of. Yet talking was so much more difficult than letting her see and feel it for herself. Looking away, I extended my Gift to her. I could feel her reaction as she heard what Jake told me. What I recognized inside her. The piece she recognized inside me now that she knew what to look for. I let all my fears flow into her as her own worries mixed together at what this meant. How this changed everything.

I severed the connection, leaving us staring at the other, minds racing at what this meant.

Natalie spoke one word. A single word that summed up the situation perfectly.

“Fuck.”