Secretly In The Bedroom

During breakfast, I am lost in thought. I respond curtly to Dirk's two attempts at small talk. I need to have a serious talk with him, but not here. Finally, everyone is done eating.

“Thomas, Sina, can you please clear the table?”

I wink at Dirk to let him know he should come with me. My only chance is to use the extra time while the two of them are busy.

In the bedroom, I close the door firmly behind us. I look Dirk straight in the eye. No smile. He needs to understand how serious I am.

“Listen,” my voice is thick with emotion, “what you and I do is one thing. But keep your hands off Sina! She's my daughter and I won't let you use her for your games, like you do with me.”

I clench my fists at my sides. It's a helpless gesture in the face of his physical superiority.

He raises both hands defensively. “Me? Using her? That would never cross my mind.”

The smug look around his mouth makes me doubt his words.

“This is no joke. You’re twice her age. Hell, you could be her father.”

When I realize the implications of that last sentence, my stomach cramps painfully. For all I know, he could have fathered Sina's half-sister or half-brother by now.

What I am certain of, however, is that if I had met him instead of Thomas back then, I would be with him now. Then he would indeed be the father of my child.

And with his stamina, it wouldn't have stopped at one child.

Shit, I feel myself getting wet again at the thought of him grabbing me and throwing me onto the bed. I **** myself not to look at the unmade sheets and blankets in which Thomas and I slept an hour ago with... – I correct myself in my mind – not with, but next to each other.

I grit my teeth.

“Please, Dirk, this is very important to me. I know I can't threaten you. And I don't know what I can offer you to make you leave Sina alone. But you have to do it.”

He grabs my shoulders—a tingling sensation runs down my arms to my fingertips.

“I swear to you, I won't touch her.”

He looks deep into my eyes, forehead furrowed. I could almost believe he's being honest with me.

“But...” Aha. I knew there was a catch. “... I want something from you in return.”

What now? He probably wants to make me his willing whore. He wants me to let him fuck me anytime, anywhere. A bitter laugh rises in my throat. That's already the case. What would he gain from that?

I nod to him to show that I agree.

“You're supposed to pleasure yourself here while I watch.”

That's all? I blink in disbelief. “Nothing else?”

“Nope. I just want to watch you masturbate.”

He shrugs, sits down on a chair, and crosses his legs.

“Okay?” My voice rises.

Dirk raises his eyebrows and looks at me expectantly.

Still confused, I pull my dress over my head. I leave the thin underdress on, just to be on the safe side. It would be too embarrassing if Thomas or, even worse, Sina happened to look in and see me naked.

I lift the hem at the front and slide my hands underneath. Hm! The first touch makes me tremble. My labia feel tender and soft. My fingertips trace the moisture that has spread over them.

I carefully explore myself, trying to figure out how and where it feels best. I realize that I haven't masturbated in ages. As a wife and mother, it seemed wrong to me. Masturbation is something for immature girls who don't have a man yet.

Now I'm beginning to understand that this was a mistake. It feels so good to give in, to leave expectations and moral concepts behind and just listen to my body. Maybe I wouldn't have fallen for Dirk so easily if I had satisfied my own needs in time.

Growing bolder, I slide a finger into my vagina. Ah! I touch my clitoris very carefully so I don't moan loudly.

Actually, I had planned to put on a show for Dirk and fake my orgasm. I would be the first woman who couldn't manage that.

This idea vanishes faster than my sense of shame. Uninhibited, I finger myself toward my climax. With my eyes closed, I listen to my inner voice, feel the increasing tension in my lower abdomen, in my stomach. I can feel that I'm about to come.

It's almost time. Yes. Almost. Yes, yes, yessss!

I bite my cheeks to keep from screaming. My fingers continue as if they have developed a consciousness of their own, carrying me through a wonderful, long-lasting orgasm.

My knees go weak. A few unsteady steps. I sink onto the bed, my hands still buried in my lap. My pulse is pounding in my temples.

“He swore,” is my last thought, then darkness envelops me.