Scarlet Wars: Episode 2 (Part 1: Let’s Start the Show!)

Written in collaboration with Cross C

Sunlight splashed over the quaint Westview town square, transforming the lawn into a kaleidoscope of dappled grays. Round tables, draped in checkered dark gray and puritanical white cloths, dotted the grassy expanse, each occupied by neighborhood couples eager for a Saturday afternoon's diversion.

All of the show's supporting cast was here, along with enough extras to fill out a crowd. The men wore sport coats, ties and fedora hats. The women wore colorful frocks and dresses. There was Dottie, the blond beauty and the formidable leader of the neighborhood association, sitting at a prominent table, radiating an air of authority and elegance. Beside her was Phil, her dour mustachioed husband, recently embroiled in a scandalous workplace incident that left him jobless and, by neighborhood whispers, less potent in certain endeavors.

A few tables away, Norm, another diligent employee at Computational Services Inc., shared a table with Herb, the heavy-set Black man known for his role in the neighborhood watch. Their camaraderie was evidenced by Norm clapping Herb on the back, a friendly gesture that causes a sandwich to fall out of Herb's mouth.

There was the power couple Arthur and Natasha Hart. A striking gap between them both in age and looks. Arthur, a stern middle-aged man, dressed in a conservative gray business suit, was tall and staunchly built with thinning hair. Natasha, however, was young and outrageously shapely, clad in a strapless gray minidress that showed off her long, voluptuous legs.

Hart had his arm casually wrapped around Natasha, his hand boldly exploring the contours of one ample bosom even as an older woman far closer to his age sat primly, their live in maid Lucille Sugarbaker, across the table from them. Lucille looked none too pleased as Natasha moaned softly and leaned in to Hart's lustful groping.

Before the tables In the center stood the gazebo. Painted a cheerful grey, it served as the makeshift stage for the afternoon's entertainment. A thick curtain, a velvety chalky grey that swallowed the light, bisected the stage, obscuring the final preparations from the audience.

And behind it were the two Main Characters of this particular scene.

“...what’s the time now?”

Geraldine, a slim African-American woman in a smart dress and vest combo with a stylish updo, looked at her watch, “Hm, about two minutes since you last asked.”

“Ooohhh, I don’t know where he could be!”

The audience laughed at the comical predicament that Wanda found herself in.

We were deep into episode two of the show, and the latter titular Vision was nowhere to be found. His wife was pacing back and forth in frustration, jiggling around in her tiny assistant’s outfit while waiting for him to appear.

It was the Westview Talent Show, and the pair were set to appear as ‘Illusion and Glamor’. Magician and assistant ready to perform a bevy of 60s inspired magic tricks to awe the crowd, though Wanda particularly wanted to wow just one member. Dottie was the town gossip, the hot shot host, the blonde beauty that everyone followed. If Wanda could impress her, then they’d be on easy street, socially speaking. Her future children would get into good colleges, they could attend fancy parties, the whole shebang! But… that was IF Vision appeared!

This charitable event was supposed to be for the children, so if her husband never showed up then she’d be letting so many people down!

Wanda worried this was all her fault.

Their lives were perfect, better than perfect, yet… not one day after their lives had started here in Westview, they’d had a disagreement. Not a fight! But, well, words. This morning before the show.

It was all about their love making last night. Wanda knew there was something different about it, but Vision would not reveal what it was. Dodging the question as if he was embarrassed by their passion, which only made Wanda more upset. She wanted to praise him more than anything, it had never felt so good before! The ratings for that episode would have been through the roof! Such wholesome vanilla fun between a married couple.

Yet, they’d fought.

The worry in the back of her skull that something was wrong… especially when the topic of Mark had come up. What a strange neighbor he turned out to be, yet Wanda could not stop thinking about him…

She shook her head, discarding the worry as best she could. Her role today was not a silent wondering wife, she was a bewitching powerful star!

Geraldine, who had been staying by Wanda's side even while performing her assistant duties, turned to see a tall man climbing up the gazebo from the sidewalk, "Um, is that him?”

Vision, the typically composed android, seemed to have encountered a malfunction. He stumbled and swayed, gears audibly grinding, as if he had indulged in a few too many beverages. His cape hung crooked and tattered from one shoulder.

"Well, it looks like he’s got a little hitch in his giddy-up." Geraldine remarked dryly, as Vision lurched unsteadily to Wanda, nearly colliding with her before catching himself on a gazebo column.

Wanda looked aghast, "Vis!"

"Oh. Hello dear..." he slurred his words, stumbling forward into her arms, "Whoa! Wanda, my little cabbage, you look positively smashing!"

"Vis, are you-? Are you tipsy?" she stage whispered, panicked by the synthezoid’s bizarre attitude.

Geraldine helpfully held a finger in Vision's face, watching his eyes cross in confusion as he tried to focus… only to burp on air that he didn’t inhale.

"He's drunk as a funky skunk!" the assistant declared.

Wanda looked like she wanted to crawl in a hole and die, "I-impossible! He can't get tipsy!"

"Impossible is my middle name!" Her husband quipped back before pausing and looking confused, "Well, in point of fact, that’s a lie. I don't have a middle name! Nor a last name for that matter. Did I get one when I married you, darling? Or did you lose yours when you married me? Vision Maximoff, has a bit of a ring to-"

"Vis!" Wanda cut off his frustrating train of thought, "That's not the issue. How did this happen?!"

Out of nowhere her kind and nosy neighbor appeared, having apparently heard the whole affair from beyond the curtain, breezing in with a type of confident strut that only the most brazen of eavesdroppers would attest to. "My my, and here I was excited for a gen-u-ine magic show! But it looks like your hubby won’t be able to go on in this state!” Agnes insisted, quickly grabbing the synthezoid’s arm and walking him to sit down on the stairs leading up to backstage that Vision had just stumbled up, “There ya go you tall drink of man. You sit right there and not bother anyone with the devil’s nectar coursing through your veins.”

With a goofy smile, Vis saluted at the orders, “Yes, ma’am! Wait… what veins?”

Ignoring his confusion, Agnes turned to her new friend, “Okay Wanda, I’ll take care of your man for now, so you go on and dazzle the crowd!”

“Go down without me, dear! Snrk! Like in the movies!”

“Ah! Buh-!” Wanda protested, wanting to reach out and grab Vis before it was too late, “I-it’s a double act!”

“It IS a double act, and it looks like he’s ready for you.” agreed Geraldine, yanking the witch’s top and dragging her in the opposite direction to Vision, nearly pulling her whole jiggly brasier apart in the process. “So get out there already!”

Confusion and propulsion shoved Wanda onto the stage, stumbling on her heels, fully prepared to be completely mortified with embarrassment as she assumed she had no act. Who ever heard of a woman on stage alone? She was just the assistant!

Which is why she was stunned to find out she wasn’t alone at all.

“Ah! Here she is, my beautiful assistant ‘Glamor’ has finally graced us!” The man in a magician outfit beamed, gently taking Wanda’s hand and leading her to stand next to him.

Both the studio audience and real stage audience erupts into a symphony of cheers and whistles as Wanda Maximoff gracefully steps onto the stage, undoubtedly the curviest and most well-endowed woman in the neighborhood, save for perhaps the suspiciously Russian accented Mrs. Hart whose cleavage was practically horizontal. Her flashy leotard, sparkling with sequins, highlighted her exaggerated curves, creating a mesmerizing display.

“Now, as I repeat myself for the first of many times in this show, I am The Amazing Mesmero! Stage Hypnotist Extraordinaire!”

After another wave of claps, a hush fell over the Westview town square as a spotlight somehow sliced through the dappled sunlight, illuminating the stage.

Wanda’s heart couldn’t help but beat ever faster for the man she was standing up on stage with.

The newest cast member to Wandavision and the second potential love interest for this ever-growing in popularity sitcom: Mark Williams.

The show's camera, ever the voyeur, began its ascent. It started with a glint of light reflecting off Mark's impeccably shined shoes, a polished black testament to Agnes’ meticulous care. Up, up it went, tracing the sleek lines of his trousers, the fabric clinging to every sculpted muscle with an almost possessive hunger. Then, it hit: the first undeniable evidence of Wanda's infatuation.

Right above his right knee, a bulge announced itself. Not just any bulge, mind you, but a magnificent, telltale curve, a testament to Mark's impressive… masculinity. The camera lingered, tracing the outline, the way it tapered into a thick shaft, straining against the fabric. Even the camera seemed awed, its focus blurring slightly as it absorbed the sight.

But the camera wasn't alone in its appreciation. As Mark's trousers continued their upward journey, the entire audience seemed to follow, their gazes mirroring the lens as the round shapes of not one but two enormous testicles came into view. They were clearly defined, each easily larger than a plum, their shape evident even through Mark's tight-fitting slacks.

It was mesmerizing, literally.

Every man, as one, shifted uncomfortably, crossed their legs in a sudden flurry of self-consciousness. Knees suddenly felt weak, hands found involuntary employment in pockets. Even Arthur Hart, a man accustomed to looking down on most, found his gaze dipping south, a flicker of envy crossing his face.

The women, however, reacted differently. Legs, demurely crossed moments before, now splayed open with an almost comical eagerness. Heads tilted back, eyes wide and unabashed, they drank in the spectacle, fanning the heat clouding their faces with their hands. Whispers, like the rustle of leaves in a sultry breeze, rippled through the crowd, each one a hushed ode to Mark's undeniable assets.

A true moist vaginal collective, each one supposedly happily married to their respective husbands was now salivating at the sight, mouths agape, their panties quickly soaking through as they thought of just what lay behind those buttons.

Everyone was enamored by the sight. Wanda, the crowd, the cameraman, the studio audience, the longer they looked at that bulge the stronger its effects…

Then, with a resounding CLAP, Mark's hands came together, startling the audience and breaking the spell. His voice was strong and clear, echoing off the town square walls as he addressed the crowd,

“Sorry about that folks! I didn’t realize the strength of Mar-erm~my own powers!” He said with a lovely accent that mirrored his wife’s, “Today, I will be providing a lovely environment of hypnotic suggestion. A space that proves mesmerism is as powerful as even the witches of Salem themselves, a potent form of suggestion few can utilize, and maybe getting the wife off my back about my career choices~."

The camera shifted again, this time moving upward to capture Wanda's face, revealing her reaction to Mark's introduction. Her cheeks were flushed, eyes wide, and lips slightly parted as she stared transfixed at Mark's… talents. He looked so strikingly handsome to her. Wanda loved her husband, but this new cast member was making her heart go crazier than when she fought Thanos. Yet now the only fear she had was if her nipples could poke through her tight assistant’s garb. She tried to ignore the bulge in his pants, tried to ignore the smile he now wore that looked so inviting, and definitely **** herself to ignore the thumping in her chest… but the more she looked at him the more she had to gulp back her feelings.

A wave of claps, this time using diegetic sound rather than from the audience at home, emerged from the people in front of them. Even Dottie, who was famously hard to impress, was clapping at her neighbor’s candor and stage presence.

The same neighbor who Wanda had kissed yesterday, and who had yet to leave her mind.

“What an excellent crowd we have today, right Glamor?! So many lovely townsfolk here to enjoy light entertainment for the children.”

“For the children.” The audience monotonously agreed.

“Aren’t you all dolls? No wait, that’s later in the show, ha!” Mark smiled, speaking in a rather familiar cadence, “Ahh! Feels good to be a man, doesn’t it, men? So much chutzpah in the pants, I can’t help but look at my assistant’s pretty face and get a swell time swellin’!”

He had been so quiet every time she’d met him before, but now Mark was actively flirting with her. The heroine’s pretty face was covered with a gray blush, much to the audience’s delight. Men agreed with the statement, and women were invested in the drama. “Th-thank you, Great Mesmero.” She politely curtseyed, getting a bigger grin from him in the process.

“Ain’t she lovely? And don’t worry folks, I assure you my swells and swirls are all part of the show!” Mark laughed, snapping his fingers at Wanda as quickly as his mood swung, “Though perhaps my assistant can help me with something? My hypnosis is much more adult themed than the kids we’re doing this for should be watching. I have quite a ‘magic wand’ that wants to be set free, if we all catch my drift?”

She did, it wasn’t like he had subtle dialogue. Mark wanted to use his pants python in the show? That was… surely that was bad? This little provincial town, full of honest morals and Christian sensibilities, would never accept Wanda if she stood up here with a mad man whipping his penis about.

But then she’d get to see it…

“All I want is a little ‘spell’, Glamor.” Mark grinned, wiggling his fingers at the audience, “One that lets everyone here know that this is an inhibition free zone. We can have our show, the audience has a good time, and you can enjoy yourself as much as you did your hubby last night~”

Wanda blushed a hard gray at Mark’s comment. How embarrassing, but it made sense that her direct neighbor heard her passionate cries, that’s probably why he wandered over in a slumbered haze!

But that wasn’t all he inferred. Last night… Wanda had shifted reality just a little. Unknowingly, of course, but the audience beyond the screen had seen the changes. Wandavision XXX. A smuterific extravaganza of lewd erotic parody, or at least that’s what the reviews were calling it. That kind of genre change would let you use any tool you wanted on this stage, and surely when the episode returned to normal it would take everyone’s memories with it. So, was there any real harm?

Maybe. But Wanda wasn’t here for that. This was for the children. All she had to do was follow Mark’s lead. With a wiggle then a snap of her fingers, Wanda felt the atmosphere of the town shift once more.

It was strange, but a little voice inside her just told her to trust in Mark…