Bria goes to college?

Life had been both easier and more exciting for Bria Jeurgen ever since she was named Miss Teen Minnesota; she filled her time attending fun events instead of boring classes. So it was truly special when the beauty queen received an offer that would give her an education without the annoyance and tedium of studying: a full scholarship without academic requirements, if she helped promote the newly branded University of the North Star.

Bria was invited to visit the main campus in north Minneapolis as a VIP guest, beginning with a limousine ride from Norville with the dean, Carl Wood, and a current student, Hassan. Both of them were black, and Mr. Wood explained that the college, currently called Northlands Community College, predominantly attracted a lower-class, inner-city and immigrant student body to technical and vocational study, but that new ownership were interested in expanding the curriculum and the demographics.

"This is where you come in," Dean Wood explained, offering the flattered teen a flute of champagne as Hassan sat close by her side. UNS management were offering her a full scholarship to cover her tuition, housing, and even a monthly stipend if she agreed to attend next year, live in student housing on the 'big' or main campus (as opposed to the satellite campus in East St Paul) and, most importantly, enthusiastically appear in the school's promotional materials and anticipated media campaign. "We want people to associate you with 'big' UNS."

"I sure associate her with big 'uns," Hassan observed, gazing down her top. "That is a fantastic rack, girl!" Bria **** a laugh as the two men looked her over carefully, nodding to one another.

"We want big UNS to be a place where a girl like you can come, relax, have some fun and find a nice guy you'd never otherwise meet, like Hassan," Dean Wood continued. "And every guy is going to want to come to big UNS hoping to hook up with Bria Jeurgen, am I right?"

Bria only smiled nervously as she processed the unusual offer, knowing how proud her mother would be if her seemingly air-headed daughter went to college and how unlikely it was that she was going to get any other similar offer. The car arrived at the campus, a ramshackle set of buildings located in the closest thing Minnesota had to a ghetto.