No Pants Dance

Standing in the middle of her room, I had originally planned to just kick off my shoes and drop the pants. Now that I was here with her watching so excitedly, a new idea came to mind. I felt compelled to give it a shot… no matter how mortifying it was.

Raising my arms into the air, I began slowly swaying my hips. Instantly, Kaylee burst into laughter. “What are you doing?”

“Taking my pants off.”

“With your hands in the air like that?”

I nodded, feeling the heat roll off my cheeks. What was I even doing? But it was too late to stop now. Besides, Kaylee was having a blast so it was a win in my book.

“This is a sacred Hoffman ritual. It’s the only way to safely remove one's pants.”

Leaning back, she continued to watch with an amused smile on her face. “Oh, if it’s a sacred ritual… by all means.”

At the start of this, I was trying to think of ways to be sexy. Now, I realized that wasn’t what the situation called for—not to mention I had no idea how the fuck I would pull that off. I didn’t know what the hell was sexy or not. Instead, I decided to just… be me. Kaylee seemed enraptured by me making an ass of myself, so I leaned into that.

My movements became more exaggerated as I waved my hands in the air, rolling my hips in a wide circle. I turned around, lowering my hands so that I worked the fingers into the waistband. I gave a little shimmy, edging it down slightly. The belt held, preventing it from going much farther. I did that a few more times before thrusting my butt out. Kaylee was laughing the whole time as I twisted my head to look over my shoulder, giving the air a puckered kiss. A few pelvic thrusts and a spin or two and I had my belt removed. Using that as a prop, I danced around like it was a ribbon before dropping it on the ground. From there, I worked at the zipper. I made powerful tribal noises at each pelvic thrust, edging the zipper down a little more each time. A few stomps and I got the button undone. From there, I just power flexed my arms and made grunting noises as I shook my hips. It didn’t take long for my pants to slide down my leg.

It would have been perfect had I remembered to take off my shoes before I started. When I tried to step out of them, the whole thing came to a violent end. With a loud, ‘Oh shit!’ I nearly face-planted onto her floor. Kaylee was howling in laughter, holding her stomach as she rolled side-to-side on the bed. Embarrassed more at the fall than anything else I’d done, I quickly pulled my shoes off and pushed my pants off. By then, she’d recovered enough to sit back up, wiping tears from her eyes.

“I have to say, that was the best way a man has dropped his pants. Ten for ten would watch again.”

“Glad you enjoyed it,” I said, settling back on the bed. The upside was the dance and fall were a hundred times more embarrassing than sitting next to her in only my underwear. I grabbed my phone before it slid off. “Why did I get this out again?”

Catching her breath, she giggled a few more times before lifting her own phone. “Damn, I should have recorded that.”

“Hell no!”

Smiling, she opened her free hand. “Phone!” I handed it over. “Oh right, unlock it first.” She went to hand it back.

“Password is 1582.” She looked up at me, surprised. “What?”

“Nothing,” she said. Her smile had morphed. It wasn’t the smile of someone amused, but someone who was happy. I didn’t have anything to hide. I mean, besides the massive felony-scale secret I was keeping. The smile shrunk a bit as she flipped through the apps on the phone. “Where’s Preference Profile?”

“Hmm?” The name clicked a second later. It was the government ‘dating’ app. “Oh that. Don’t have it.”

“You don’t have it?” She seemed genuinely surprised. “God, you are so weird! Here, let me download it for you.”

“You don’t have to…”

“It makes things so much easier,” she said, completely ignoring me as she tapped on the screen keyboard. “A quick glance and guys know what I like, and I have an idea what they like. I’ve had a lot less awkward sex since I started using it, especially after the beta update that added ratings.” There was a brief pause before she handed me the phone. “Here. Just plug in your Citizen Number and government PIN to log into your account.”

Begrudgingly, I took my phone back. “Don’t I need to create an account?” I asked as I punched in the numbers.

“Nope. The government automatically created one for everyone based on Citizen Number. You don’t have to use it, but it’s suggested. As I said, it’s improved things a lot since I started using it.”

Sure enough, after entering in my government PIN and pressing enter, I was in. Already, prompts were popping up telling me to update various settings. I read some of them as I closed the windows. Sexual preferences. Favorite positions. Sexual partner history. Relationship status. Kinks and fetishes. It was incredibly detailed the amount of information you could enter. At the bottom of the screen, a red number 1 appeared atop the mail icon. I clicked it to find a link request.

Kaylee Webb C#336-09-09234 has requested to link profiles. Accept? Y/N (Note: Review access levels to ensure you are sharing only what you want.)

“I sent you a link request,” Kaylee said a second later. “That will make it easier for us to see each other's profiles.” I hit accept and was shifted back to my blank profile. “Okay, we are linked!” she said. “I set you to full access.”

“Full access?”

“Yeah. You can see everything,” she said, brushing her hand through her hair. I looked down at my phone and found myself staring at a blank profile. Leaning close, she sighed. “Here,” she said, taking my phone. A few swipes and presses later, she handed the phone back. Her smiling face greeted me as her profile picture took up most of the screen. Right below it was a 4.9/5.0 star rating with a small icon indicating the feature was still in beta. The best part? Under that in big bold letters was Relationship Status: In a Relationship.

Pressing the button on the side of my phone, the screen went black. Beside me, Kaylee had a quizzical look as I turned my head. “You aren’t going to look?”

“I believe I purchased a minute of unlimited kisses.”

Taking my phone, she set it next to her phone on the desk. “Alec,” she said slightly louder than normal. Her phone chirped. “Set timer, one minute.”

“Setting timer, one minute,” the smooth artificial male voice said.

I stared at her in disbelief. "Wait, you are actually timing this?"

Leaning back on her bed, Kaylee gave me a questioning look. “Well? You’re burning your minute.”

She giggled as I quickly crawled over her to kiss her. Her arms wrapped around my neck as our lips met. I could feel the fabric of her bra rub against my bare chest, the heat of her skin pressed against me as we shared a long kiss. Unfortunately, I couldn’t enjoy the moment to the fullest, having to maintain some mental distance to crunch math problems in my head as I squeezed my thighs to keep blood from flowing to the greedy glutton between my legs.

I didn’t kiss her lips for long. Moving away from her lips and the lingering taste of mint, I softly pressed my lips against her jaw before moving to her neck. Below me, I could feel her breathing harder as she tilted her head to give me better access. The gentle kisses against her neck got a soft moan from her as she wiggled beneath me. Her hands trailed down my side before wrapping around me to hold me against her. I could have spent an eternity there, but I was on a timer. Kissing down, I was just about to reach the upper edge of her breast when I heard her phone chime.

Her hand swatted the offending phone, silencing it. Wondering what was going to happen next, I pressed my lips against the soft swell of her exposed breast only to have a hand press against my forehead, pushing me away. I looked up to find a flushed Kaylee smiling down at me. “Minutes up.”

My eyes trailed down to her bra. I wondered if I could remove it, though I wasn’t sure I could control myself then. I was already pushing my luck as it was. My legs were hurting from my effort to prevent me from getting a boner. “Can I buy an extension?”

“You couldn’t afford that. Besides, any more and I might break my promise.” She gave a forceful wiggle under me and I rolled to the side, allowing her out from under me. I watched as she walked across the room to pause next to the light switch. Seeing that she was going to kill the lights, I slid under the covers. The bed wasn’t big enough for two people to sprawl out, so this was going to involve a lot of cuddling. Flicking the light off, the room went dark except for a dim night-light that did little more than identify where the far wall was. A few seconds passed before I felt Kaylee crawling into bed, her hands pressing heavily on my legs and hips.

“If you hog the covers, I’m kicking you out and you’re sleeping on the floor,” she warned as she slid next to me.

“So demanding,” I said with a chuckle.

“Hmph. Consider yourself lucky. Guys usually have to get me to cum before I allow them the privilege of sleeping in the same bed with me. I suppose I’ll allow an exception for you.”

I was glad the darkness covered my reaction. “Gee, thanks.” Her kiss surprised me and any discomfort was wiped away when I felt her body press against me. An arm draped over me, I felt her head press against my chest as I shifted my pillow to a more comfortable position. Even if I felt a bit uncomfortable, there was no way in hell I was going to complain. I could smell the faint scent of her hair as I leaned forward just enough to kiss the top of her head. A long, comfortable silence followed.

“Scott?” Her whisper pulled me away from the sleep I had been drifting towards.

“Hmm?”

“Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For this. I know it’s uncomfortable for you, but I really wanted this.”

I moved my head back slightly. Sadly, it was too dark to really look at her. “Kaylee, this isn’t uncomfortable for me. The exact opposite.”

“I’m glad.” I felt her arm shift as her hand ran down my back. “Normally I don’t like sleeping with guys. It’s awkward when they try to cuddle afterward. I like it when we just have our fun and they leave. This though? Not getting that feeling at all.” She sighed, moving slightly like she was getting comfortable.

Like everything with Kaylee, she was so sweet, even delivering a bitterness that made her words bittersweet. Then again, that was on me being the odd one out. Society would shame me for being selfish in wanting to keep Kaylee all to myself. Not that it would matter. It was clear that she didn’t want that either—at least, not in the same way I did. I didn’t doubt her feelings for me, but I was selfish. I wanted to be her everything, just like she was to me. That wasn’t going to happen at this rate. Being here like this with her had given me a confidence I didn’t know was there. Change was possible, and not all change was bad. As long as I was careful, I could work towards something better. Kaylee had helped make this happen, but I couldn’t rely on her to do all the work. That wasn’t fair to either of us.

“Goodnight, Scott,” she said sleepily.

“Night, Kaylee.”

Closing my eyes, I drifted off to dreams of a better tomorrow.