Watch how Despedida handles her search

Tschau's situation looked desperate, but only Despedida had been left alone with a giant, super-technology robot, the likes of which the general public probably wouldn't see for another twenty years at least. Tschau's captors seemed like they intended to do just that: capture her. Despedida, on the other hand, would be pretty lucky if that machine's cannon arms shot out some kind of net or taser. Your hacker was very likely in lethal danger, being treated as expendable while your team's stealth expert was the real target for subdual. You had to know if Despedida really had some trick up her sleeve that could deal with a threat like that.

For now, the agents went through the motions, patting her down while she made various quips and stopping when they felt something inside her pants pockets at her hip. Rather than simply asking her to remove her valuables, the man patting her down made obvious motions for her to drop her suit's trousers.

"Yo, buddy, I'm not trying to plant some kind of bomb on the Gambit, alright? Jock's gonna be fine." Even now, she was still making jokes.

Impatiently, the man placed one hand atop his pistol- an overtly threatening gesture- then barked at her to pants herself.

"Geez! I'm tired of being ordered around by Goldeneye looking mo'fos. Ya'll gonna be lucky if I don't go Slappers on your asses." The men looked even more confused than you ordinarily would, hearing her banter. Still, eager not to create some sort of inter-CEDIT incident, Despedida followed their request, first removing her belt, then slowly pulling her pants down around her shapely, caramel-colored legs. You thought that the Russian agents were probably getting more of a show than they ever did on this base, unless Milaslava did this sort of thing for them.

"Ha ha ha! This is your capable hacker, hm, Washington? Are you sure you don't just keep her around for the eye candy? She does not seem so fearsome as I'd heard the Goodbye Girls were," the Russian general chuckled, resting her cheek on her fist while watching you curiously.

The man lifted up Despedida's shirt-tails, despite her protest, revealing a pair of close-fitting panties with pictures printed around the panels.{if Weakness for Video Games = 1} You recognized those as the enemies from Dig-Dug, tracing a curving pattern of tunnels around the garment.{endif} The enemies chuckled a bit, probably thinking that seeing cartoon characters on her bottom made her especially laughable.

"Yeah, real cool, dudes. You try looking cool with your pants around your ankles," Despedida grumbled, holding her hands above her head while the increasingly smirky guard began to run his hands upon the side of her dress shirt, then unbutton the front. Evidently, he wanted to see if the top matched the bottom. "What is this, some old ero puzzle game where you can't stop until you've seen the whole picture? It's also Dig-Dug, dude! Fuck off!" She became increasingly vocal as the officer seemed to decide he'd rather keep his hands cupped on the generous swells of her breasts than see what was under the shirt. "Last warning, fuckos."

Two who evidently understood English gave a chuckle, then one threw his thumb over his shoulder, pointing at the robot in the background of this salacious scene. The robot, in turn, focused its red eye-beam on Despedida and pointed its guns in her direction.

"Oh? Yeah, I noticed you've got that Robocop thing over there. Mortal Kombat 11 has Robocop too now and he looks better in that."

The guy behind her gave a breathy chuckle, then spoke in English into her ear: "Warning Shot." The grin lingered... then fell slowly as no warning shot came. A deathly silence came over the Russians.

"You wanted a warning shot, right, right! Hey, Robocop! Give 'em a warning shot!" At Despedida's command, the robot began to pepper the ground around the officers holding her with gatling gun fire, causing them to fall to their knees and take cover. "Woah, woah! Don't move around too much or it'll shoot you by accident! Pretend you're Mario and this guy's Dodo, okay? Only jump if he's right on top of you; otherwise, you gotta be still as a statue!"

Seeing that their robot was no longer under their power, the men in the room dropped their weapons and held shaking hands above their heads. None of them wanted to risk being turned into swiss cheese by their own weapon.

"Sweet! Now, I'm gonna go back and meet your boss, okay? I'm taking my pants with me." Despedida wasted no time grabbing those up off the floor, along with her belt, then looping them over one arm. No wonder she hadn't been worried about the robot... She'd taken control of it before anyone had even verified you'd need it. Talk about over-prepared.

You tilted your head down slowly to look back across the table, wondering what sort of expression Milaslava would be wearing. To your surprise, she looked fascinated, grinning from ear to ear while cupping her metal hand at her chin. "I underestimated the little bombshell, Washington! She is quite impressive; very, very much so! Oh, Russia would do so much with a hacker with such talent... She is wasted on you Washingtonites and your, eh, over-cautious, political maneuvers."

You wondered if you should tell Milaslava that you'd never seen ethics or public scrutiny stop Despedida from hacking whatever she wanted. At any rate, she was headed back this way with the giant robot stomping behind her. It only just now occurred to you that all the hallways had been built with extra large gateways to allow such a thing through. As you thanked your lucky stars for Despedida's competence, you noted that the bodyguards were clutching their guns warily, but not pointing them at anything... It didn't seem they intended to shoot you or Despedida, despite that show of strength she'd just pulled.