She's on her way

"Okay," Karen said. "Time to get ready."

"I've been ready all my life," Matt protested.

"Don't make me laugh."

"You know what would make my mom really turned on?" Amy asked. "If you were shaved."

"Huh?"

"Your pubes. I looked at her search history. She has a little bit of a fetish for young boys. If we shaved your pubes, she'd love it."

"But--"

"And you might be able to get her to stream with you. Matt and the MILF, if you know what I mean."

Matt sighed. "Fine. I'll be a joke in the locker room in the fall."

"Everyone will think you're doing it for your channel and you'll be the envy of the other guys. Now come on." She grabbed his hand and dragged him toward the bathroom.

"Let's get the sheets changed," Karen said. "I'll put on some romantic music and light some candles. {if ****=true}You might clean up around here a little.{else}You just sit at the dining room table and think to yourself that some stranger is banging your son because you couldn't bring yourself to do what everyone in the world knows you desperately want to."

"That isn't fair."

"Sorry. It isn't fair. It's true, though. Now I've got to get to work. I'll lay you long odds that woman breaks every speeding record on the Hill getting over here."{endif}