Face the Amazing Ronnie

"In this corner," begins the announcer over a loudspeaker system, "weighing in at 115 pounds, the terrible teen, the d-cup destroyer, Juuuuuuuust Joyyyyyy!"

The crowd cheers loudly and you jog out of the tunnel into the bright lights. The stands all around you are packed with probably nearly a hundred people. So many you can hardly believe they all came to the party. They're chanting "Joy!" over and over.

You wave and jog towards the walled ring. It's basically a giant square cup on a trampoline and lined with plastic sheeting. The inside is covered with clear oil.

You step beneath the middle rope and nearly slip on the greasy surface immediately. A few in the crowd laugh, but you stead yourself on the rope.

The referee, in hip-waders, walks over to the corner of the ring opposite you.

"In this corner," he begins and the crowd quiets, "weighing in at 135 pounds, the master molester, the horrible humper, Aaaaamazing Ronnnnnnnieeeeee!"

A very skinny man in red trunks runs from the opposing tunnel. He looks to be in his late 30s, he's got a terrible comb over, very pale skin, and he's so thin you can see his ribs. His large nose gives him a slightly ratlike appearance. This is one ugly guy and you don't intend to lose to him. He bounds into the ring with surprising dexterity and holds his hands aloft as the crowd jeers.

The referee motions you both to the center of the ring. You approach the Amazing Ronnie warily.

"No scratching, no rough biting, no kicking the privates," the referee explains. "First person to pin the other person for a three count wins and gets to have his or her way. Shake hands and return to your corners."

You reach a hand out to Ronnie and he reaches out to shake, but at the last instant reaches past your hand and tweaks your nipple through your bikini top. You squeal and the audience laughs. You return to your corner red-faced and a bit angry.

A bell rings and the fight begins. You...