Breaking point

It was no good, he had to say something. He had turned sex down a couple of times now in favour of masturbating over his fantasies and it was starting to affect their relationship. Sarah was beginning to get short tempered with him and he was behaving like an addict. It came out as these things often do when they reach a breaking point. He had refused the offer of sex again and Sarah had lost her temper and shouted "What's going on with you? What's so good on the internet that you'd ignore your own wife?"

The words had cut him deeply. A wave of guilt surged over him for ignoring his wife's feelings in all this. He sat down with his head in his hands and poured out his heart. He apologised, he explained how he had developed a fetish that he was too embarrassed to share with her and feared how she would respond. Sarah's mind was filled with dreadful thoughts of all the worse kinds of perversion she could think of so when he finally came out and said "I want you to cheat on me" she first sighed with relief before the blow of what he had actually said hit her. Se sat down herself having been too angry up to this point to sit but now she was confused and a little hurt. After a painfully long pause she responded "Don't you love me any more?"

Tom was gobsmacked. How could she think that of all things? If anything the opposite was true that he loved her so much that he didn't feel worthy of her and this is what he told her.

The conversation ran for some time with Sarah struggling to understand why her infidelity could be arousing to him and he finding new ways to explain it. Eventually Sarah had said that she needed to think about what he's said and went to their room. Tom was in a mess. Any excitement he'd had before the argument were gone and the found solace in the bottle. They didn't speak for the rest of that evening and Tom never went to bed and just passed out drunk on the sofa.

The next thing he was aware of was the clunk of a cup getting put on the coffee table and a hand gently shaking him. Through bleary eyes and an intense headache he saw Sarah smiling softly at him holding out a glass of water and some tablets. "Morning treacle. When I saw the empty whisky bottle I thought you might need these."

Tom hauled himself up into a sitting position and tried to gather his thoughts with zero success. He took the pills off his wife and swallowed them, polishing off the water in one. He looked over and saw Sarah sat in the armchair looking at him with a calm. warm expression. "Hey" he said.

"Hey yourself. Think you're going to be sick?"

"No, I'll be okay once the pills kick in. Look I..." he began but she cut him off.

""No, let me speak first" she paused gathering her thoughts "I can't pretend I fully understand what you told me last night. You say you still love me and I'm going to have to take you at your word, and because I love you I can see that this is important to you. So whilst I can't promise to do exactly what you want I am prepared to look into it to try and understand it and I am prepared to maybe role-play or something like that if that is what you need from me But..." she cut in before he could say anything "if you ever neglect our marriage like you have been doing there will be no wife to cheat on you, do I make myself clear?"

Tom felt like a chastened child but it was nothing compared to the relief that not only was she okay with him again but she was prepared to work on the situation with him. The waves of emotion masked if hangover and he stood up and moved towards Sarah. Sarah sensing his intent stood as well and they held each other and tears flowed between them.

After a shower Tom was feeling much better and he dedicated the morning to spending time as a couple. Come the afternoon they went to bed and made delicate love with each other. Afterwards they spent a long time in bed doing their own thing companionably. It was with some surprise to Tom that after a while together Sarah said "So what should I be looking at to understand this fetish of yours?"