Christie Addario

A young, curvaceous blonde approaches. They're not quite in the same state of sopor as you yet, but clearly several drinks in.

Christie: "Hiya, you're lookin' pretty fancy tonight."

Sophie: "Uggg... Who the... who is you?"

Yeah, that's a sentence. 'Who is you'. You are just drunk off your arse.

Christie: "I'm Christie. What's your name, babe?"

Is she coming onto you? You think she is. Or she might just have one of those obnoxious tendencies to refer to strangers way too casually.

Sophie: "I'm Sophie. You... soul-... seem kinda familiar. Are you like a m-movie star or somth'n?"

Christie: "Oh girl, I've been around the block a few times, ehee! Fact is, I scored a frigin' awesome deal today, and I'm here to get wa-aa-asted!"

Sophie: "Well woop-de-doo to you I guess. Me, I just got laid off."

Christie: "Aahh, sorry to hear that luv! How's anybody got the heart to fire a pretty lil' gal like you?"

She's starting to sound more and more like a **** horny man. You guess it's sort of endearing, kinda in the sense of 'haw haw, let's both get a laugh at the expense of those men'. But on the other hand you like men. Up to a certain point.

Christie: "Aaanyways, you'se the finest chick I've seen in like, ever. So drinks are on me, you hear?"

Aww hell yes, beer tastes so much better when someone else pays for it. You'll listen to her rambling all night for that.

And so you do. She just goes on and on about how she's such a bigshot actress and half the state's got the hots for her. She really doesn't seem to know who you are, does she?

Christie: "...which was only a few months ago, I'm sure you remember. And there I met, you'll never guess, motherfuck'n Michael Monroe!"

Sophie: "Who?"

Christie: "The rock star! You've never heard of Hanoi Rocks? Ah who cares they're basically underground in the states. Where was I? Oh yeah, so the ceremony was a real drab and all, but it really got me connections. And that's when the producers came to me and pined about how bitchy their lead actress was. So we got hitched. Movie-wise."

Sophie: "W-wat... wait can you back up a b-bit there? I wasn't listening that close, what movie this was again?"

Christie: "The upcoming Power Girl movie, geez! Try to stay awake, girl."

Sophie: "Ah alright, no probs... HEEEYY."

Christie: "Hm?"

Sophie: "Y-chi-wha-ha-ma-ba yo, You're, YOU IS t-that CHRISTINA ADDER AREN'T YOU?!"

Christie: "It's pronounced Addario, but I guess."

Sophie: "Aww guurl, I'm sort of mad atchu, you know... I... I was gonna star in that movie... and it's you that got me fired..."

Christie: "OH noooo! Oh fuck me I'm so so sorry I had no idea! Y-You're that {You}, then! The fitness girl, right? I really don't follow that kinda magazines, you know..."

Sophie: "It's... it's alright, you've been s-so nie-nice to me, and I've been just... wallowing in self-pity allll this time."

You slump forwards, resting your chin against the table.

Sophie: "I'mma fucken drunken r-wreck."

Christie looks on, mildly worried, before resting a comforting hand on your back.

Christie: "There, there... Y-you should get some rest. Look I'll call you an Uber or something and help you home."

The cab arrives in five, and Christie practically carries you inside. You nearly pass out on the journey, having to constantly lean on Christie for support.

As you get back home, Christie marches you straight upstairs to bed and gets you a glass of water.

Sophie: "Chr- Chrust... Uh, Adder-girl?"

Christie: "Yes?"

Sophie: "Can yoou- ss-stay with me? I'm, I'm afraid I might **** on puke or somet-thing..."