A heart-to-heart

While you recognize that your chances of survival inside the group are lessening by the minute, you also have to acknowledge that your chances of survival outside are almost non-existent. Mending bridges is your best chance of seeing the next sun-rise.

You go and knock on the garage door, and get no response. Against your better judgement you open it anyway and walk inside. Lea is there, still naked, and sobbing, being consoled Gwen, who was only wearing a pair of panties. You grab a folding chair, and using all your willpower you open it up and sit so that your head can rest on the back, and you are not looking at the hot nude women just feet from you.

"What do you want asshole?" Gwen asks for the pair.

"I want a talk. Just a talk." Damn is it hard to focus in this situation. "If you want me to leave, I will walk out that door and never look back, but if you want me to stay, then we need to have this talk, and sooner is better than never." You wait for them to say something, but they don't, and you find the silence oppressive.

"When we first met at the mall I had been alone, and hiding for a long time. That night was the first time I left my hideout since I set up camp there. When I positioned myself as the aggressor in that situation I found myself changing. For the first time in my life I had power over someone, and that fed into my lust, and my aggression, and my testosterone, until I was little more than a beast figuring out how to prolong and reacquire that feeling. Since then I have felt like I'm bouncing back and forth between who I was, and who I'm turning into. I agreed to the deal, because I was afraid that if I channeled these feelings at a time and place I shouldn't that I would either be dead, or worse, that I would let them consume me." Just keep focus on the shelves in front, don't focus on the naked ladies. Why wont they say anything?

"Now don't get me completely wrong, those emotions feel really good together, and I'm definitely not feeling as much guilt as I should... And the reason I did what I did a couple minutes ago was because I was always taught to reciprocate during sex. That's probably one of my old habits. If you're receiving pleasure from someone, then you should attempt to return it as well as you can. If that crossed a line you didn't wasnt me too, I'm sorry. That's one of the reasons I wanted to have this talk. We haven't really set any of the minor boundaries yet... I just wanted to make sure you didn't absolutely hate every second together...." Please say something...

After another minute or two you get up, and return the chair to where you found it. You do your best not to look at your partners while you leave. As you pass through the door way you feel the need to say something about how you'll be right outside, or that you'll let them work through what they need to work through. Instead you simply pause, **** on some words, and continue out the door.

You sit outside with wet eyes, and consider losing the only people who have accepted your presence in weeks, possibly months. The world feels much colder and emptier than before.