You have no idea (long distance)

You awaken to the strange feeling of dirt underneath you and something crawling across your torso. Swiping at it, you feel it run away, jolting you the rest of the way to consciousness.

Looking up you see the boughs of a tree in front of a mostly clear sky. Turning, you see a road on one side of you, and a wall of vegetation on the other. And looking down you see your own body. Your torso looks the same as ever, albeit covered in a rather different top than the one you were wearing before. However your lower body is encased in something you recognise: one of the devices from Kloayka's Kontraptions.

High heeled wedges are wrapped around your feet. A harness is wrapped around your pelvis, holding what is almost certainly a small plug inside you. And covering it is a set of leggings with a stiff seam up the back of each leg, exactly in the style you were planning to purchase.

As you shift, you feel something inside the crotch of the leggings. Its a note.

Greetings, John. You seemed so excited to try out the company's product that I thought you might enjoy a nice test drive. Is it still a test drive if you've already paid? Anyway, your equidistant between two nearby towns. Pick a direction and enjoy the ride. When you get to either one, look for a red van. They'll have the keys to deflate the device and unlock the straps.

You put down the note, still feeling a bit shaky from whatever they dosed you with, and try to stand up. As you wobble onto your feet, you feel the subtle shift of the toes of your shoes compressing, and an even more subtle shift as the plug inside you moves slightly.

This should be interesting.