White: King's Bishop f1 to c4

The King's Bishop surveyed the field grimly. The King's Pawn had just charged forward, to be half-matched by the single square advance of the Black King's Pawn. But the ranks were now open for the pieces to come into play. To his right stood the snorting charger of the King's Knight, and to his left stood the King, regal and ****. He mulled over White's possible moves. Perhaps he would be advanced, an early attack looking toward a king-side castle?

The Bishop noted the stirring erections of his fellow pieces as they contemplated the battle. Yet many of their fluids would no doubt be spent in the dust or spilt forcibly by jeering Black amazons. But Black would suffer its own wounds. His own rod stirred as he scanned the front rank of Black pawns, rising to part the folds of his robe.

"King's Bishop to c4!" the White controller thundered.

He gripped his staff and marched down the open white diagonal between the King and the King's Bishop's Pawn, out to the center of the field, stopping a distance away from the advanced pawns, matching ranks with the White King's Pawn.

The opposing army loomed closer. As he came to his station, he looked right and forward down the white diagonal toward the Black lines. His line of attack touched the Black King's pawn, but at its single square of advance, it was defended by both its back-rank fellows. And yet the pawn shiver, coming under his gaze. As well she should. His rod throbbed and filled.