The Measure of a Man

Liam might have cowed his family but I wasn’t so easy. I’d seen these tactics from him for years as he manipulated teachers and parents and our cohort against me combined with having been numbed to Blair’s casual cruelty toward me during our time together. I saw right through his gas-lighting for the toxic and twisted tactic that it was. I knew my ladies would have seen through him too if they were capable right now, but Liam was a master of leveraging his Alpha advantage against them. They couldn’t protect me from him, but I sure as hell was going to protect them!

Stepping around Heather to close the distance between us I meet Liam halfway. We stand toe to toe, so close I am **** to tilt my head upward to look him in the eyes.

“You…asshole.” I say, pouring all the derision of what I really wanted to say to him into that single word. Wanting, needing, to be the bigger man for Heather’ sake I resist the urge to rant and swing fists, keeping voice firm and steady despite the emotions surging inside of me. “You didn’t need to do this, Liam. To say these things. Nobody needed to get hurt here.”

He shoves me back a step. “Someone’s getting hurt here, Elliot. And that someone is you. Did you really think I was going to let you get away with this.”

“Liam…” Heather starts to say until my raised hand silences her. I didn’t want Liam to hurt her anymore than he already had.

I step forward again, though only half a step as Liam had moved to occupy territory in a petty display of ‘dominance’. I don’t try to push back against him, I simply inhabit the space he leaves me.

“I’m not ‘getting away’ with anything, Liam. I am here because this is my home. This is my family. I am here because they want me here.”

“Because you tricked a lonely widow.” He growls, fists clenching.

I wait a beat for the peak of his anger to fade, knowing keenly that we danced on the edge of ****.

“Nobody was tricked, Liam. Heather and I agonized over what was happening, we knew the repercussions yet it happened anyway. Love is like that sometimes.”

“Don’t you lecture me on love, you little…hole.” He snaps. “This family…”

“This family…” I cut him off, my gaze unflinching. “…has been worrying about you more than you could ever know. They loved you even when you didn’t deserve it. And you come back here like a wrecking ball to destroy the peace and happiness we’ve built in your absence? Why would you do that?”

“We?” He scoffs. “There is no we, little man. They are MY family, not yours, you sick twisted freak. I can’t believe you’d stoop so low as to take advantage of a lonely widow. Of MY mom! Your parents are fucking ash, Elliot. Your folks getting barbecued doesn’t give you the right to steal mine.”

The room goes dead silent at Liam’s cruel language around the **** of my parents. It hurt, but it gives me strength. In the back of my mind I am sitting in the living room of my family home as my mother dries my tears and my father kneels at my side, his strong hand on my shoulder. ‘A bully is only as strong as you let him be, Elliot.’ My Dad’s voice echoes through the years. ‘Don’t feed him. Let him rant and roar. Starve him of what he wants and he can’t hurt you. Not in here. Not where it counts.’ He lays a hand on my chest. My mom kisses my cheek and whispers. ‘Bruises heal, my boy, but the wounds that stay are the ones we give ourselves. You are stronger than him, remember that.’

Letting his insult settle I speak. “My parents are dead. They aren’t here to feel the sting of your words.” I look around the room. “But Lily is. And Julie. Roger and Rebecca…”

“Shut the fuck up!” He tries to shove me again but I expect it and roll with it so I stay close.

“And your Mom.” I finish my point. “Is that the kind of man you want them to see you as?”

“Fuck you, Elliot. I’m more a man than a little beta follower like you will ever be.” He looms over me. “You’re more her pet than you are her partner.”

I shake my head. “Beta? Really? That’s your best shot? Grow up, Liam. If you weren’t so focused on being an ‘alpha male’ maybe you would have learned how to become a man.”

“Oh, you think you’re a man, do you? I will crush you.”

“I know I am a man.” I jostle back as he shoves me again. Again I step right back up to him. “I am not afraid of you, Liam. I pity you.”

“Pity!?” He exclaims. “That’s rich coming from a pitiful orphan pissant like you.”

“I pity you because you had all this.” I motion around to the women who stared at us. “And you chose to become this.” I motion to him.

“Spare me, hole. You’re just her plaything, Elliot. Their cock sleeve. You are a ****. A drone. Like Roger.”

Rebecca bristles. Her jaw tightens and scowl deepens as she lays a hand on her husband’s shoulder. Roger puts his hand on hers and pats it, silently signaling that Liam’s insult found no purchase.

“I take that as a compliment.” I say. “Roger is a good man. A kind man. A wise man. I learned more from him in one afternoon than you have in 25 years from what I can tell.” Still holding Liam’s gaze while his eyes had begun to dart around I say steadily.

“Roger’s a drone. He does what he’s told, a woman’s puppet. Just like you.”

“Just like Alexander?”

He grabs my shirt with one hand and nearly lifts me off the ground. His eyes burning, his breath hot against my face, he seethes. “Don’t you EVER talk about my dad! EVER! You aren’t fit to kiss his feet, never mind sleep in his bed!”

Undeterred I say in a low voice. “Every time you open your mouth someone gets hurt. But it’s not who you think.”

He glances left and right at the family who were staring at him as if her were a stranger, some of them with tears in their eyes. His loss of control had made him reveal things he hadn’t meant to and he knew it. His eyes snap back to me. “You think you are so clever, turning them all against me.”

“I didn’t do that, Liam.” I say. “You did.”

He shoves off of me with a snort. “Little drone. Why do I even care what you think? You can’t turn them against me. You’re just…you.” He looks to Heather. “Momma…”

“You bastard.” I whisper.

Shamelessly he speaks again, his voice is soft and boyish. “…Momma, make him apologize to me.”

“Liam?” Heather whispers as she looks back and forth between him and I. “No, Elliot is a free man.”

“Mom, you know that’s not true. Not even a little bit.” His triumphant smile makes my skin crawl. “Momma, he insulted Daddy. He hurt my feelings, Mom. I want you to make him apologize to me. I didn’t even do anything wrong! Momma, make him do it and everything will be okay. I’ll be good and we can all be one big happy family again. All he has to do is apologize and we can be friends. I promise.”

Heather stands a moment, a dozen emotions playing out across her face, then takes a hesitant step forward. She approaches me and lays a hand on my shoulder. I gaze into her eyes but say nothing. If she asked me to apologize to her son I knew I would have to. I stand looking at the face of the woman I loved and reminded myself that, like the rest of us, she was caught in the same web. We all had our parts to play and, unfortunately, right now Liam was the king of the hive. Heather slowly, gently, smooths my shirt where Liam had crumpled it. She fixes my collar. She brushes a hair from my forehead. And then…she turns to her son and slaps him across the face!

The room gasps as one. In my time with her I had NEVER seen Heather raise a hand in anger and I suspect neither had anyone else. Liam stands with wide, disbelieving eyes, holding his cheek more hurt from the shock of it than the impact.

“You do NOT get to come back here and ruin everything!” Heather says with the righteous fury only a mother could wield. “You cruel…heartless…SELFISH boy! Elliot is MY man, you will show him the respect he deserves!”

“Momma?”

“Don’t you Momma me, boy!” She points, her finger a mere inch from his nose. “I was a fool for not seeing you for who you are. I always saw the best in you, even when it wasn’t there to see. Because you were my son. You were the alpha, you had special gifts and challenges, so I gave you space to bloom. But I don’t even recognize this person standing in front of me now. In refusing to see the truth I let you down, son. But that does not excuse your behavior or what you’ve said here today. Alexander would be ashamed of you, using his **** and the **** of Elliot’s parents as ammunition for your sick games.”

“Mom!” Liam’s voice cracks. “Stop this! If you hadn’t have broken down after Dad…”

“NO!” She cuts him off. “You don’t get to say that to me!” Throwing her weight into it she shoves her brawny son back a step. “Stop acting like you were a child. You had already graduated when my Alexander passed on. A young man! But you didn’t act like it. You think you were the only one to hurt? Losing your father tore my heart out!” Her voice wavers as she teetered on the edge of tears. Stepping up beside her I take her hand, she clings to mine for strength. “You KNOW what losing a mate is like for us. I couldn’t even look after myself, how could I look after anybody else? You lost a father. I lost my everything! And where were you? Who was there to catch me? Lily. Julie. Rebecca. Mia. Where were you!? Where was the man in my life when I needed him most?” She squeezes my hand. “Elliot makes me happy. He understands me. We were each other’s even before the bond. He loves me and I love him. He’s here for me, to hold me when YOU make me cry after calling only to beg for more money.”

“Mom, I tried…”

“No. You didn’t. You know you didn’t.”

“I remember.” Lily’s soft whisper pulls the attention of the room her way. “I do remember what Dad said after his first scare.” She looks up into her brother’s eyes, hurt and anger swirling in her brown eyes. “He did tell us to look after each other. He made us swear. He said if anything happened to him we’d have to be strong together, because Mom would probably follow him to the other side.”

“Lily…” Liam says.

Lily, on a roll, continues. “But he said to be there for HER most of all. He said if she was to have any chance…she needed us as much as we needed her growing up. He told us we had to be strong for her when she couldn’t be.”

Liam, now on his heels, looks around at the group like they were a mob of pitchfork wielding villagers. “You are choosing him over me? Your own blood? I can’t believe this.”

“A family isn’t defined by blood.” Comes Mia’s small voice as she steps up beside me and takes my other arm. “A family is who stands with you when nobody else will.” She looks to her mom and dad. Her volume grows, the power of her singing voice coming through her steely tone. “My family chose me. And I choose them. And I affirm that choice every single day. They don’t love me because they have to, but because I am theirs and they are mine.” She lifts her chin in a very Rebecca like way. “Family goes deeper than blood.”

“Oh, Mia.” Rebecca whisper, pride and a fresh understanding glimmering in her and Roger’s eyes.

Julie looks around at us then marches over to stand near me, her back to Liam as she refused to even look at him. It took strength, I could see that, for her to choose her Matriarch and Prince over the all-conquering ‘Alpha’, but she had done it with all her scrappy resiliency. We weren’t quite the automatons that Rebecca once thought we were. Ever the eloquent one she mutters. “Fuck you, Liam. Fuck you! Go back to Spain.”

“But…I’m the son. Her son. You’re my family…” Liam says as the world he had so long taken for granted falls down around him.

“Yes. We are.” Heather says. “And we always will be. But we’re done being your fools. You call Elliot a drone.” She smiles and looks at me. “You couldn’t be more wrong. Elliot is here for me. Working hard every single day for this house and this family. This…growing family.” Liam’s face goes pale as Heather brings my hand to her belly. “Elliot is building things, at work and at home, while you waste your best years getting a tan. He’s strong. So strong. Elliot’s shown me, shown all of us, how a real man behaves.” Heather takes a deep breath and squares her shoulders. “I love you, Liam. I will always love you. But you are not welcome here. Not right now. Not until you…grow up.”

Liam was speechless as he stares at his mother, still processing her long overdue chastisement. At a loss for words he looks to his sister for support. “Lils…”

Lily pulls away from him as he goes to touch her. Hugging her arms around her body she closes off and shakes her head. “Not this time, Liam. Mom’s right. Things were finally getting better…before you showed up. We’ve been together since the only thing we could hear is each other’s heartbeats. But that doesn’t mean I don’t hurt when you use me. You don’t get to call me names anymore. Not anymore. I’m not a deviant, Liam. I’m a lesbian. And there’s nothing wrong with that.” Briana comes up beside Lily to put an arm around her. “If you’re ever in trouble, real trouble, I’ll be there. Until then…just leave me alone.” Lily turns away from her twin brother and buries her face in Bri’s shoulder.

“Lily. You too?”

Briana glares at him and leads Lily away.

He looks around at his family, united against him once more. This time though the wall had no cracks to exploit. He shakes his head with the genuine confusion and pain of a narcissist whose actions had finally caught up with them. He looked at me accusingly, still seeing me as the source of his troubles. I really did pity him. He didn’t, couldn’t, understand what was happening or why. Not yet. That would take time, maturity and whole lot of soul-searching.

He opens his mouth to say something…then thinks better of it. He looks at his mom for one last long moment then turns around to Rebecca and Roger. “Let’s get out of here.”

Rebecca stands tall, raises her chin, grips her beloved husband’s shoulder tighter, and says. “You can walk.”

Liam looks at his aunt and for a moment I worried about what he would do. Finally he just snorts and shakes his head as he storms back out of the screen door that he had busted and I would eventually fix.

Beside me Heather shudders and closes her eyes as tears begin to roll down her cheeks.