The drive home

You give Matt a quick kiss goodbye and then thank everyone for such a nice evening, then you leave though the front door with Paul. It's dark out, and cold. Glad I'm not jogging home tonight. You see the lights flash on a black Mercedes as Paul opens it remotely . "Wow, nice car" you say just for the sake of saying something as Paul opens the passenger door for you.

He smiles and thanks you as you bend and get in, then shuts your door and walks round to the drivers side. As he gets in the car you suddenly feel more than a little uncomfortable, being in such a confined space with an older man who you don't really know that well. You fasten your seatbelt, a little conscious of how the belt pulls between your breasts. Your tight fitting top now stretched even further over each breast making them stand out individually from your chest.

You are both silent as Paul reverses off the driveway. As he checks his passenger side mirror it feels like he's looking right at you but you dare not look his way. God, this is so awkward. It's like there's some kind of tension? Once you are out on the road you relax a little.

You feel a need to fill the silence. "So what do you do? For work I mean? You've got an office here?"

"Yeah, so I have a few businesses locally... own a few properties in town, rent them out... and I part own a pretty large garment factory up north. But I do all the administrative work here at my office. That's where I spend most of my time." There's a long pause as Paul concentrates on driving.

"Wow, that sounds like a lot to manage. Do you spend a lot of time working?" you ask, trying to keep the conversation moving.

"Yeah, yeah I do to be fair. I like it though. Keeps me out of the house." He looks at you and smiles, then looks back to the road. Oh I wonder why you don't want to spend time at home with your darling wife?

"I don't think Lydia likes me" you blurt out after another long pause. "She thinks I'm like all the other trashy little thieves and druggies on Park Road, but I'm not. I'm nothing like that.....And I don't want to be like that either. I wanna be... you know... more classy... like you lot round here" you look at the nice neat houses flying past on either side of the car. "She's not giving me a chance." You are surprised by how upset you sound.
"She's been a bit unfair with you. You're right. But don't get down about it. I can see that you're a nice girl. Lydia will see too...eventually." he winks at you and you feel a little more reassured.

"Thanks...and thanks for offering to take me to the competition next week. I will find all the details and let you know".

"No problem. It'll be my pleasure. I always wanted Matt to get into sports but he never did. This will be my first chance to cheer from the sidelines like a proper dad." He smiles warmly again, and you find it rather touching. No one's ever cheered for me before. You keep that thought to yourself and instead you pick up his phone. "I'll put my number in and take yours. That ok? Then I can send you the deets".

He looks surprised, but then happily says "Sure, good idea".

Theres more silence as you sit back looking out of the window.

"How long does it take to get back on the bus usually? Must take a while" Paul asks. Does he feel awkward too?

"Errr yeah, takes a while" you reply absent mindedly. Then you think fuck it, why hide it? "So... I've not actually been taking the bus home all that much.... mostly I've been jogging home." Hope he doesn't think I'm looking for sympathy. But no point lying about it anymore.

"What? Jogging?.....Why?...don't you have a student travel card or something?" He looks genuinely shocked at what you've said.

"Yeah, I do. But it just gives you a discount, you still have to pay..... sometimes I've just got no money. None. I've got a part time job in a cafe not too far from home but I don't get many shifts. My mum is in and out of jobs. Mostly out. And she drinks most of what credit we get from the council. It sucks!...... sorry, I shouldn't be telling you all this. I'm not looking for pity..... Just helps me to talk about it...."

"Jesus Emily. I didn't know things were that bad. I'm really sorry"

"It's ok. I get by. I'm fine, really".

You're nearing home now. You can see your block of flats getting nearer and nearer and the dread returns that you always feel when you're in sight of that cold grey lump of misery.

"So there's a little carpark just here. It serves all these blocks. I can jump out there" you say, pointing to the right.

Paul pulls in, stops and turns the engine off. Ok, what's he gonna say? This is weird.

He looks undecided on something and the awkward feeling returns. The tension is palpable between you both. Is this sexual tension? Am I attracted to him? He's old enough to be my dad. If I had a dad. Maybe that's it, am I one of those girls with daddy issues? You smile to yourself, trying not to laugh.

He's looking at you. "Well thanks for the.." you begin to say but then Paul speaks over you. "Wait, look, I can't ignore what you've told me. Sorry if this is blunt and I don't want to offend you... but here" he pulls a wallet out of his pocket and starts to count notes. You just stare at him dumbfounded. He holds out his hand to you. Your heart thuds. This feels wrong.

"Emily...here's £50. Please take it."

"I...I can't" you try to say. You look at him. God he's so sincere. Just like Matt.

"Please Emily, take it. You need it. I don't. It's as simple as that. No need to over complicate it.... Just promise me you wont jog home again. It's really not safe for a beautiful young woman like you to be on her own at night. Especially round here".

You slowly reach out and take the money. Oh my god this will help so much! You are lost for words.

You lean over to him and kiss him on the cheek, then sit back down again. "Thank you Paul. That really means a lot to me that you would help me like that."

"Hey, it's fine. Honestly. You deserve a little help. Just don't tell Lydia a out it OK?" He smiles and winks again, "or about that kiss on the cheek!"

"I promise not to tell your wife you paid me for a cheeky kiss..." you tease as you get out of the car. You're certain that he's checking out your behind as you bend and lift yourself out of the seat. "...and thanks for saying I'm beautiful..." you joke again, then shut the door before he can respond, leaving him laughing to himself.

You walk towards the main door to your apartment block and look back at the car. The engine is on now but he is still watching you. You carry on walking, putting a little sway into your hips now. Your perfectly toned bottom, tightly wrapped in denim, graciously dancing side to side with each step.

You smile and wave one last time then disappear into the building.

You feel a sudden relief, like the tension has gone. But you can't help but notice that you feel wet down below. Seriously? What the fuck is wrong with me?