The Alchemax heist

Hey there readers! It's me, your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man! Today I have a pretty embarrassing story to tell...

One far night I was staking out New York City's brand new Alchemax building. You see dear readers, Alchemax was the latest player in the unbelievable advanced and dangerous technology game, and I knew villains from across New York would want to hijack some Alchemax tech and use it for their own nefarious purposes. And since I have the most nefarious villains of all it was my duty to stop them. So I sat on top of a skyscraper overlooking the Alchemax building and waited for anybody to show up. I'd been doing this for 3 days and no one had shown up, but that was about to change.

A figure soured through the sky and landing on the roof of Alchemex. Finally, someone had taken the bait. I swung over to them curious of who my opponent was going to be this week. Was it Vulture, Mysterio, maybe Shocker trying to make himself an actual threat. I landed on the roof and hid behind an air conditioning unit I heard footsteps, and thanks to my Spider-Sense I could notice that the sound of them was not of any normal shoe: For every step, I could hear a noticeable clomping sound. I deducted that whoever this was must be wearing heels. Then I heard the metal rustling. The robber must be planning on infiltrating the building using the airducts. They'd need to be pretty slender. At that point this Amazing Spider-Detective was pretty sure he knew who this was. I jumped from behind the air conditioner unit and shot a string of web at the criminal, sticking their arms to the duct and leaving them immobile.

"Felicia," I said joyfully. White hair, black skimpy bodysuit, gloves with claws, and hot as hell that was the profile of this well-known cat burglar. Felicia Hardy, aka the Black Cat, was an old flame of mine. Beautiful, witty and able to keep up with my spider abilities, she's everything a hero could want. You know if she wasn't also a notorious criminal. After they broke up she'd left New York for a while but it looked like she was back.

"Have you come to keep me company?" I ask.

"Maybe," She replied with a seductive smile. I approached her naively drawn in by that smile only to be rewarded with a kick to the jaw after entering her range. I was knocked back onto my butt. You'll have to catch me first."

By the time I got my bearings and sat up Black Cat had broken out of my webs and escaped into the ducts.

"Well, here we go," I said secretly smiling behind my mask.