Grace, the college freshman

I spent all summer trying to find an opportunity to ask what kinds of things I could buy to impress the college boys. But I always got scared at the last moment. Besides most of my friends weren't really popular and were unlikely to know much about boys. My strict parents never allowed me to date so the prospect of exploring independence was exciting. Equally exciting was the prospect of losing all independence per TRAP regulations. Thankfully, I convinced Sasha to attend the same school, so I wasn't facing this new challenge alone. Even with all the normal excitement of leaving home, I couldn't get the thought of the TRAP rules out of my mind. I knew I wasn't going to score the lowest on any tests, so it wouldn't matter but what about the girls who did?

Sasha was actually going to be my roommate. It was going to be so much fun! Our parents got along really well. They helped us move and our dad's were super helpful while our moms were just super anxious about us leaving home. We enjoyed a nice dinner before they left the next morning. After our parent's went to their hotel, we heard buzz in our dorm about a party the next night. The night was pretty calm overall for a freshman coed dorm. We had girls and boys rooms on alternating floors.

The next day was a plain day, no classes had started yet, so me and Sasha walked around the campus and found where our classes would be. A lot of students were playing sports or laying out in public areas. The boys were so much cuter than in our high school. We made a few friends along the way. That night we went to a rowdy but uneventful party. Sasha and I weren't accustomed to parties, so we kind of just stood around and chatted politely occasionally. It sure looked like many were enjoying the freedom of being away from home, but I found myself thinking about what my less reserved classmates would do to me in the absence of my basic rights.

Orientation could only be described as standard. Classes were fine. I had a feeling I would do great in my science, math, English, history, and French classes. But I also needed a fine arts class. My parents insisted I learn classical violin, but I couldn't find a violin class this semester and wanted to check off this general education requirement this semester so I took an acting class.

The first week went well, starting on a Tuesday. I understood the syllabus and read ahead. It looked like I was going to understand most of the material. For acting 101, I got a script, a partner, and daily pronunciation and relaxation exercise. I read the script and thought I got it, but it was a romantic scene where a young Parisian woman was saying goodbye to her boyfriend who was part of the French resistance in the 1940s and had been found out and was leaving to Africa the next morning. I had no clue how these were assigned yet. My partner couldn't practice until Friday night because he had sports practice in the afternoons and mornings. On Friday, we had a first practice. He seemed so natural and it seemed like he really loved me and was heartbroken to move. I felt stiff as a board. I didn't even feel comfortable with a boy speaking that close to my face, much less talking about how a young Parisian couple might enjoy their last night together. I knew my lines perfectly, but felt like a robot saying them. Apparently my partner, Mark, also felt my performance needed work. He suggested we practice again on Sunday. It didn't go much better. I was supposed to kiss him, and he was handsome so that was a plus, but kissing this relative stranger with our entire class watching was outside of my comfort zone as an academic wallflower. I was sure it would be fine though. It's the first week for what I considered an introductory fluff class.

The morning went well. I had the weekly test in each class and did great in all my others. My writing could use some work, but I wasn't even near the bottom of the class. My father would have had a fit I only made a B+, but it wasn't even going to count towards my cumulative grade, so who cares. After lunch, the only class was acting 101. We showed up and me and Mark were the third performance. The professor was grading on the spot. I felt more comfortable expressing emotion after the second rehearsal, but when it was in front of 20 other people, I was back to being stiff and nervous. I was hopeless but the professor was merciful. I was assigned a C and Mark was given an A+ since it was clear he was working overtime to save the scene. The class went on and I realized the lowest anyone else got was a B.