She barely deflects it; it knocks her lasso off!

The floundering Amazon somehow manages to escape being hit by the third bullet, but she mis-deflects it. The bullet grazes her hip and knocks the golden lasso right off! The famous lariat rips loose and flings away behind the heroine.

Wonder Woman looks behind herself, but there's no time to retrieve the lasso. She looks back at the bad guys, and she realizes she's putting the innocent partygoers in peril by just standing there. She looks up and sees an exposed beam spanning the large room. 'If I'm up there,' she thinks to herself, 'their bullets will fly harmlessly up and away from the mayor and his guests.'

As she's done a thousand times before, she bends her legs and propels herself upward... but neglects to compensate for her recent weight gain! Instead of landing gracefully on her feet the way a spry and spritely young Amazon would, she slams her fat gut smack into the side of the beam. The crowd below all hear a loud "Ooofff!," as the clumsy heroine barely manages to grab onto the beam. After what seems like an eternity she manages to clamber up and stand atop the beam. She looks down, and the bad guys -- heck, even some of the party guests -- are laughing at her!

"Ooohh," she seethes, stomping her foot. She strikes a defiant pose, sucking in her belly and putting both wrists up again, ready for bullets to start flying up at her.

Incredibly, nothing happens! The mysterious blonde woman barks a quick order, and the masked men start harassing the guests again, shrugging their shoulders and ignoring the useless Amazon. The bad guys shove more jewelry and wallets into their sacks. Poor Wonder Woman is dumbfounded. 'How dare they! They're just ignoring me!,' she thinks.

One of the guests, a prominent businessman and supporter of the mayor, yells out, "What the hell good is that goofy Amazon doin' anyway? First she's so scared she pees in her pants, and now she's hidin' up there by the ceiling while we're gettin' mugged by these creeps!"

There are murmurs of "yeah" and "that's right". A slim, smartly-dressed thirty-something woman chimes in too. She's a member of the City Council. "Hell," she yells, "give me that ridiculous power belt and I could do a better job than her!"

More shouts of agreement. "Yeah," someone hollers from across the room, "and the belt would fit you better too, Councilwoman!"

Poor Wonder Woman, her jaw drops, she's so shocked to hear people ridicule her so. She puts a hand on her fat belly. The aging Amazon is suddenly self-conscious about being up there in plain view of everyone, her fleshy body straining the seams of a skimpy costume meant for a fit young woman.

Meanwhile the bad guys are finishing up their mugging. "Okay everybody, pipe down," the tall blonde yells at the guests. "Shut up, and nobody gets hurt." A couple of her goons start grabbing necklaces and other jewelry off of women who hadn't handed it in yet. A gentleman tries to stop one of the masked men from touching his wife, and he gets knocked on the floor.

'I've got to do something,' Wonder Woman thinks to herself. She decides to walk carefully along the beam to get closer to the bad guys so she can jump them. The big blonde notices this, and reaches inside her purse again, pushing more buttons on her remote.

Before Wonder Woman can get to her jumping off point, she starts feeling like she's losing her balance. "Whoa..." she says, squatting down for a second, "what's wrong with me?" She stands up again and tries to take another tentative step or two, when suddenly she's surprised by an odd itching feeling in her boots. "Ow!," she squeals, then starts to stumble as her feet bump into each other. "Oop!," she yells, trying to squat down again... but it's too late! One foot slips off the side of the beam, and the clumsy Amazon falls!

The tumbling heroine is right above a heavy wooden table that has a huge cake on it, like a giant birthday cake in honor of the mayor's fifth year in office. The crowd watches in disbelief as the plump Amazon plummets downward, shrieking, "Aaaacckkk!", and does a total belly flop, "Ooommmmffff!", her heavy body splatting down across the whole length of the cake! But it's not over yet! The sturdy wooden table is no match for the hefty heroine. It cracks, and the legs splay out to the sides and the tabletop and cake, and Wonder Woman, plop down another three feet, crashing to the floor!

There's a momentary silence in the room. Everyone, bad guys and good, stand there open-mouthed. Wonder Woman is not just belly-down but face-down in the cake! She slowly raises her head up, and the blonde and her goons start laughing again. Wonder Woman's face is covered with icing, just like in a slapstick movie!