Theirs is not to wonder why

It had been a grueling twenty four hours for Sam Carter, but honestly, waking up with her arms wrapped around Cindi hadn't been so bad. The little princess was cute. No wonder all the boys liked her so much. She had that sweet, innocent, angel vibe, and Sam would never admit it, but wrapped up around her had been one of the best nights of sleep she'd had in a long time. Cindi wasn't even stirring, not used to waking up before the sun, and for all that she wished she could get a few more hours sleep, she needed to view the footage from last night before she got to her 'official duties'.

Sam tried to stay quiet, Adam was spilling out of both ends of her couch, it was almost funny, her mom was hunched over the workstation, she'd fallen asleep reading some science shit. Where the hell was Sam's pad? She'd set it down last night as was her custom. When they were barely more than kids, Adam had told her they gave you brain tumors if they stayed on your arm while you slept; nightmares had ensued, it wasn't true, but she'd never slept well with it on her arm, since. So much history between them, she thought wistfully. She'd gotten him back badly for that one. A snowball ambush that put him in bed sick for three days. She smiled. Back and forth and back and forth. It hadn't always been anxiety and longing and sadness pretending to be anger. Why couldn't they have stayed kids a few more years? She would give anything to be on that snowy hill with her best friend who put rocks in her shoes, and pulled her hair.

The steady beep beep beep of her morning alarm clued her in. Adam had her pad. Of fucking course he did. She stopped tiptoeing and grabbed his arm to pry it free and went down in a tangle of limbs and floor. Her cousin was smashed against her and boy was he heavy. Self-defense training had put her forearm into his neck to keep him back, but his entire lower body was absolutely CRUSHING her. How much did he fucking weigh?

"Heeeeeeeey. Morning sleepyhead." She whispered fiercely. "How 'bout you get the fuck off me and give me back by stuff?" Adam looked down, the haze of sleep clearing away, guy was lazier than a fighter jock. It was already 0510! He looked like he wanted to retort back, but instead he just rose to his knees. Finally, Sam could breath again.

"Sorry." He muttered. And for once he looked like he meant it. Maybe he'd always meant it. Looking back over the day, Sam HAD picked a lot of their fights. Adam pried the pad off his arm and returned it before standing up. All thoughts of reconciliation were driven out of her head, hell Sam was more worried about getting an eye poked out. Adam had worn grey sweats to sleep and like most guys, when he woke up, some parts of him were more awake than others. Jesus. It was like an arm. Don't stare!

"Uhhhh wha-what?" Sam tried to busy herself with putting on the pad. Anything to keep from looking. It was one thing to have feelings- feelings she didn't even fully understand at this point -for Adam, it was something else to be inches from his rock hard cock.

"I said something happened last night. That's why I have your pad. We need to catch up."

"Can it wait until tonight?" God she had a long day ahead. PT, a shift at the gate, then range time, honestly the distraction and normalcy could be good, she'd been so off-kilter lately. But she needed to find time to keep track of Agnetti, so many balls in the air. Adam could wait. Without getting his reply, Sam trotted out the door, already mentally preparing for the day. Skimming through last nights spy footage with barely a glance. At least until her mom showed up. WHAT!

Sam rolled back the tape. Sure it was hard to tell, but that was the back of her mom, she could recognize her, well... ass, along with all that thick, dark hair. Apparently, he'd found her in a server room- the archives -then chased her across the base before she straight up disappeared. Agnetti had returned to his office after that, the feed from the lens was obscured. Sam rolled it back further. Just before he'd gone to find her, Agnetti had received an alert from a trace program on his pad.

"What's Project Adonis?"

Adam slipped into the shower. Aunt Kat had a few pads to spare, she'd loan him one. Well, give probably. Cindi clung to his old one like it was going to grow legs and run away. He really didn't get it. The events of last night flooded back. He'd fucked up again. Even with the BB safely keeping his urges down, he was still as horny as he'd ever been. The urges just kept building up and without a chance to release them on his sexy little sister, he felt like he was in real danger of losing control. He'd have to be more careful in the future.

As the hot spray washed over him, Adam was painfully reminded of his morning wood. Good thing Sam hadn't noticed or she'd have had one more thing to yell at him about. Between his legs, his cock throbbed angrily. Adam thought back to last night with his Aunt; it was just medical right? They were all kind of in a weird place and Aunt Kat really hadn't touched him, although it was probably as close as one could be to that line without stepping over. He felt his hand slip around his engorged shaft His mind drifting towards Cindi, his little blonde angel. She certainly knew how to tease him. And please him. Her skin was softer than silk, and the way she smiled, sexy and naughty and with just a hint of innocence, it was everything he could do not to march, naked and dripping, through the house to fuck her in Sam's bed like she'd wanted.

God, just the idea of her weaving through the kitchen in just an apron. It was enough to make him burn. But he still couldn't come. Do not pass go, do come, unless its inside your sister. He growled in frustration and batted away a loofah hanging nearby. A whiff of some sweet tantalizing scent drifted caught in his nose. Adam froze. He knew that smell. Pussy. Fresh, clean pussy. One he'd never tasted before. He swallowed. It had to be Sam's. Only, that shouldn't excite it, but it did. He knew it was just physical, Adam had something special. Something more than just sex with Cindi. Cindi isn't here though, a thought drifted out of some deep recess in his brain. She wasn't. And he really, really needed this. Adam grabbed the loofah, starring at it for the longest time, before crushing it against his face. He drank in the rich scent of his cousin's sweat and nectar. She'd been frustrated too, when she used this. Probably couldn't get off with her mom in the house.

Adam started pumping, his mind racing with desire. He could feel it. The build up. Only his stupid brain wouldn't cooperate. He tried to fix his sister in his mind, her beautiful eyes, or succulent breasts, even just remembering her taking him as deep as she could just days before refused to stick. Blonde turned to brunette, curvaceous gave way to toned, playfulness became rivalry. His sister kept turning into Sam. Adam bit the sponge in frustration, his hand pumping like mad as he imagined his cousin laying on her belly, worshiping him in the truest way possible.

Adam grit his teeth. This wasn't what he wanted, he swore it wasn't. He cared about Cindi. But she couldn't help him now. His face was full of Sam and his cock wanted a taste as well. Adam crushed the loofah against his cock and pumped harder still. "Saaaaaaam" He moaned. It was as if his dick had a mind of its own; the sweet nectar of Sam's cunt glided on his throbbing manhood, it was all he could do to **** Cindi back into his mind. He couldn't get Sam out, but maybe they could share. It would have to do for now.

He was going to cum and cum hard! Adam couldn't think he was so close. All he knew was that the loofah was a near a thing as a pussy as he could reach and he was going to ruin it with this load.

Sam rushed back into the house, her cousin nowhere to be seen, she almost turned around until she heard something from that bathroom. Was that her name? She knocked. No answer. Sam could hears a low, deep moan amidst the shower spray. She knew what she was about to do was wrong, but she couldn't help it. It felt like she wasn't in control of her body. She cracked the door open and spied on her cousin.

He was beautiful. More so than she remembered. Rippling with hard muscle, dark hair soaked to his head, eyes squeezed shut, face a mask of focus and need. He had both hands wrapped around the largest penis, she'd ever seen, and she'd seen her fair share. But that wasn't what shocked her. It was the sight of her loofah clenched against the shaft, being pumped along relentlessly, Adam's face a rictus of pure lust. Sam was transfixed, too scared to open the door even another centimeter, to enraptured to close it. Adam was magnificent when he came. He dragged the little sponge to the blunt head of his manhood and just CAME. Hot gushes poured out his shaft and coated the damn thing. How did he even hold it all? His fist never stopped pumping, but Adam smeared the slimy head against the core of the loofah, as if to mark it as deeply as possible. A low moan cut through the air, at first Sam thought it was Adam, until she realized it came from her. She retreated before she could be caught and nearly ran face first into her mother.

"Oh hello dear." Kat still bumped into her, of course. Just bouncing boobs instead of bashing brains. "Is the bathroom free?" She moved to reach past her daughter.

"No!" Sam grabbed her arm. "Adam's just finishing a shower." Great now her mom probably thought she was was a lunatic. Thanks again, Adam. Only Kat didn't look troubled or shocked, only the slightest bit pink, as if embarrassed. Not likely, Katerina Carter wouldn't be embarrassed walking naked through the busiest street on Constatine. She was spared the need to respond when Adam strode out, clad in only a towel.

"Hey. I thought you had PT?" Adam didn't seem the slightest be bothered by his near nudity in their close proximity, then again, if Sam looked like perfection made flesh, she probably wouldn't either. Ah shit, she was gonna be late!

"Aunt Kat, have you had a chance to look at-

"Nothing yet, darling." Kat cut him off with a word and a reassuring pat on the shoulder, only to slip by them both into the bathroom.

"I uh- I just came back to thank you. For saving my mom last night." She managed to keep her eyes above his pecs, just barely. "I'm Sorry. I know I haven't been-I've been sort of-"

"A bitch?" Adam offered.

"I was gonna say a jerk. You got to admit, you had some of it coming." Sam retorted.

Adam looked thoughtful for a second. "I never wanted any of this to blow back on you Sam. Really. This whole thing is a mess. What I've-

"We've." Intercut a groggy Cindi as she shouldered her way past them both to the kitchen.

"What we've gotten involved in is bad and we've got to clean it up."

"But you don't have to do it alone." Sam probed his eyes. It felt like they were kids again, Adam taking on the weight of the world and refusing to share the burden. "I always hated that, you know. You never let me help. It made me feel like you didn't want ....me."

Adam's face crumpled. "It was never like that. I was some idiot kid who thought asking for help was weakness." He smiled that stupid charming smile of his. "Now I'm an idiot adult. But I see what you're saying."

"He's a changed man, cuz." Cindi pushed past them again, arms laden with snacks and a jug of milk. There was conspicuously no glass in her hand. "He even let me put a band-aid on him a week ago."

"Please don't eat those in my bed!" Sam called after her. "Is she gonna make a mess?" Adam nodded with a commiserating smile, one that Sam soon shared. Neither one of them mentioned the night he'd left, now wasn't the time, not when their tenuous peace was so new, so fragile.

"Sooooo.... with turning over my new leaf and all." Adam began.

"Why do I get the feeling I'm about to regret my demand to help?"

"I don't actually have very many clothes, and I was hoping I could keep the flight leathers, just for a bit longer."

Sam grimaced. "Really regretting it now. Yeah, just go by the exchange, and pick something up later."

Adam nodded and met her gaze. God, it felt warm to just see be seen by him. It was like standing in a sunbeam in August. She could have stood there for days and just drank him in. Unfortunately her mother strode out of the bathroom at just that moment.

"You're still here, Samara? You're usually so punctual?" Moms. Ugh. Why couldn't Sam have been cloned in a tank?

"What happened last night, mom?"

Kat feigned ignorance for a moment before answering. "Oh, nothing I couldn't handle."

Adam rolled his eyes too. "Agnetti was chasing her."

"I gathered that. Why though?"

Kat tried to brush her off once again. "Oh I'm sure it was all some kind of misunderstanding."

"Agnetti had a tracer set to go off whenever someone accessed files about Project Adonis. What ever that means?"

Kat tried and failed to look innocent.

Adam and Sam stared at her. "Mom!"

"Yes dear?"

"I actually do need to get to training. So could you clue us in already? Whatever is going on, it has to be connected to what I'm dealing with too."

Her mom hesitated, then shot Sam a meaningful look. Sam shrugged and turned to her cousin who got the hint and went for a walk outside.

"Just give me a day to sort out the data darling. After that I'll have answer for you. In the meantime I just need one thing from you. It won't take but a minute."

"Uhhh sure. What is it?"

"A blood sample."

This day was already too weird and it wasn't even first chow.

There was a gentle knock at the door, Cindi looked up from her gorging and research long enough to shout. "Come in."

"Hiya Cin." Aunt Kat smiled down at her niece. "What are you learning today?" Cindi had always thought of her Aunt as a role model. So smart, so beloved by everyone, so able to get what she wanted just by asking someone for it. She was everything Cindi thought a woman should be.

"I'm trying to learn more about how the Invader's stealth systems work. I have an idea to improve them that I want to test." She said.

"I see." Kat didn't. Clearly. Well that was fine. Truthfully, engineering wasn't Cindi's forte either, but her hungry mind needed some stimulation. Now wave-particle dynamics was well within her wheelhouse. If she could isolate the reaction between the Lidar absorbing plates and the waves themselves, maybe...no. She'd need to fabricate new plates, and that was far beyond a talented young genius's abilities.

"Honey." Aunt Kat was standing just above her now. Her eyes shining with concern. "I'd like to run a few tests on you, make sure you're okay after all your time out in the wilds. I'll need a blood sample."

Cindi shrugged and held out her arm. What about putting up an ultra low frequency field around the ship. One that didn't reflect the waves, but dispersed them? Was that possible? Ouch! Her aunt wasn't wasting time. She felt fine, really. Whatever.

Turning back at the door, Aunt Kat called back, "I may need some more help later."

"More sexy distractions?" She wasn't sure how to feel about that. It had been sort of fun, even though it hadn't really been sexy hugging a boy, who was crying about his missing boyfriend, but unless the next target of her teasing was Adam she really didn't feel like it.

"No. Just some computer work for me."

Cindi shrugged her assent. Back to work.

Adam had a plan. It wasn't terribly complicated, but he'd spent most of the afternoon working on it, while Kat and Sam hunched over electronics, going over their respective projects. It mostly consisted of getting drunk and hoping somewhere in there he and Sam patched things up. Not a great plan, but honestly, he really missed her. Even more than he'd realized. When she was lightyears away, it was easier, now that she was here, parading around in front of him in those tight fatigues she wore, it was almost impossible to get her out of his head. As a friend, of course.

Which was how he found himself just outside the shooting range that night, waiting for Sam to finish up. She'd been standing against an open door frame talking to someone for over twenty minutes, but he knew from her body language she knew he was there. Adam game a low whistle and she shot him a look.

"Something I can help you with?" Sam scowled when she saw his clothes. "Flight Lieutenant?"

"Actually yes, could come with me for a moment Sergeant?" Adam replied, in his best impression of an officer. Sam glared at him, but left her bemused compatriots behind.

One they turned into an empty street, she whirled on him, eyes blazing. "Did you forget to do the one thing I asked for? Oh and thanks for grabbing me like that. Now all those guys will think we're fucking!" She flushed, obviously upset. This wasn't going well.

"They didn't have anything in my size, Sam. I swear."

"I don't care if you wear one of my mom's dresses, get out of the uniform. You haven't earned that."

Adam bit back a retort. As unfair as it all was, he knew if Sam thought she was right, there wasn't going to be a reconciliation without him bending first. She wasn't unfair- at least outside of this one situation -but god was she intransigent. No idea why he found that quality so attractive. In a platonic way. He just admired it, was all. Instead of shouting at her or throwing down, he showed her a bottle he'd spent most of the day tracking down. Real Confed whisky, they stopped making it after the war, so bottles were rare as hell, it cost Adam a huge chunk of the Gorgo money, but as a peace offering, it wasn't bad.

"I'm in uniform."

"I'm not saying we have to get drunk..." Adam saw her knowing look. That was the problem with friends from way back when, they knew you too well. Still, Sam took the bottle, holding it up to the light for a moment, before cracking the heavy wax seal. She took a long pull, choked, **** the swallow, her face contorted after.

"That's swill! Where'd you get this?"

Adam just looked confused.

"Have a taste." Sam offered.

Adam gave it a sniff and recoiled. He would have tossed it, but Sam had that challenging look in her eye. He took a breath and chugged the swill. It burned like hell. This was closer to industrial solvent than anything else. Moonshine at best. He inhaled and started coughing. Sam laughed, pounding him on the back.

"One-eyed Willie got you good on the Confed Whisky scam, huh cuz?"

"No." Yes. Motherfucker must have seen him coming a mile away. Only what was he going to do, alert the authorities? Was his vision going dark? Adam waved a hand in front of his eyes.

"Relax, Adam. Willie is a scoundrel, but he knows better than to blind people. Its mostly 'shine. Maybe a little what he finds in the gutter, no more than a dash of wood ****." Great. Sam offered him the bottle and when he didn't take it, shrugged and took another pull.

"You remember when we stole your dads Confed '33?" Adam didn't, but he remembered the two days after, when he'd been to sick to move. And the week after that they'd spent scrubbing the oil of an old starship as punishment.

"That was the maddest I ever saw him." Adam recalled. I don't know who he was more pissed at, you or me."

"Definitely you. You threw up on his shoes. Twice." Sam started laughing so hard she could barely get the words out. "And then on another pair once he changed! I thought it was brilliant! He couldn't even punish us, cause he had to keep going back for new shoes!" Her eyes shined with laughter. "Easily your best idea."

"It was definitely your idea."

"Was it? I can't seem to recall. It must have been your corrupting influence that made me suggest it." She passed him the bottle again. Sigh. Another pull, another wave of coughs. How did Sam just guzzle this poison?

"So I wanna see it."

There was a phrase that had a lot of nuance when you're drinking with the opposite sex. "What?"

"You say you can do things now. Super things. Show me something."

"I don't think that's a good idea. Someone could see us."

"Pusssssssssssssy."

Adam tried to laugh her off, but he recognized that challenging tone. You couldn't get out of Sam Carter's way. If she decided to challenge you, you either knocked her down or got knocked down. Excuses weren't gonna cut it. Adam spied a piece of steel on the ground, a little longer than his arm and half as thick as his wrist. He lifted it up.

"Wow, great form on that clean and jerk. What's that judges?" Sam pretended to listen. "A pussy you say?"

Adam stared at her and without so much as a strain, began to bend the metal. Sam's eyes kept getting wider. When he started pulling the steel into tight knots like it was string, her mouth dropped open. Adam tossed the bar at her feet. The sound finally jerking her out of her shock. She took another drink, a long one, draining the bottle before chucking it heedlessly over her shoulder to shatter against the ground. Great. Adam couldn't imagine what was going through her head.

"Hit me." It certainly hadn't been that.

"What?" He stupidly asked again.

"Hit me. Come on. Fight me, like the good old days."

"It wouldn't be fair."

She laughed at that. "Did we have different fucking childhood's than I remembered? I whooped your ass like redheaded stepchild ever single time."

"Not every time-"

Sam laid into him with a roundhouse. Adam barely even saw her fist,: it flew through the air to connect with his head. They both groaned, Sam shaking her knuckles out, Adam feeling his bruised skull.

"Come ON! You wanted to do something for me. So fucking do it. Hit me!" She screamed and swung at him again. Adam ducked and tried to step back, only for her kick to catch him in the ribs. He gasped and staggered back.

"Don't you ever just want to fucking hit me, Adam? Come on!" Sam feinted a high kick and delivered an uppercut. Adam saw stars. "I fucking left you on that platform! You begged me to come! You begged me and I left you. So fucking hit me!"

Sam swung at his head again and he just reacted. Adam fired a tight controlled jab that surprised them both. Sam fell back a step, mouth filling with blood from her split lip. She spit red on the wall and smiled. "That's more like it."

They circled each other. Adam had every physical advantage, but Sam was clearly better trained, and from the look of joy on her face, she wasn't exactly conflicted like he was either. Adam felt his rage boiling, but he kept it restrained. His full strength would kill her. On the other hand he might not even get the chance to use it.

Sam came at him in a flurry of punches, jabs to keep in off balance, combined with hooks to punish. A leg sweep, followed by groin kick, no attack was isolated, it was a dance of deadly aggression. Patterns were repeated, then altered, to trip him up. He tried to anticipate, but swung at empty air. His frustration mounting, and the increasing bruises and bloody cuts across his face burning, he finally abandoned all finesse and charged her. Sam tried to slip to the side but he grabbed her and hauled her into the air as he ran. Her fists rained down on his head, each punch darkening his vision, threatening to knock him out, until he slammed them both into the wall. They both dropped to a series of exhausted groans.

Breathing heavily and still wavering near unconsciousness on the dirty concrete of the alley, Adam reached out for Sam's hand. She clutched it in a grip so fierce, for a moment, he worried she wasn't going to attack again, until he saw her teary eyes.

"You okay?" He asked more scared than ever. Sam hadn't even cried at Francis' funeral. And everybody cried that day.

"Yeah. I'm ok." She dragged herself over, never releasing her grip. Their sweaty, bleeding heads smushed together. It had been like this after their fights. Afterwards, they just needed to be close. To know the other person wasn't leaving, oftentimes Adam thought he felt closer to Sam after a bout, than he had post sex. Most of the time, actually. How had he gone so long without this? He switched his grip to intertwine their fingers and laid there, panting.

"I'm sorry." She called over to time, barely loud enough to hear.

"Me too." Sam was rubbing his palm with her thumb the way she knew he liked. He'd told her that once, so long ago. Weird the things you remember. "Why didn't you come with me?"

There was a heavy pause. Sam's thumb stopped, he felt her body clench, but he didn't let her pull away. Whatever this was, he had to know.

"I was fifteen, Adam." She finally answered.

"Bullshit. I want to know the truth. You owe me that." What was so terrible that she couldn't tell him after all this time?

"What do you want me to say? We're different people, Adam." Sam shot back, eyes hooded. "We're not all born to shake the world. Some of us like rules and structure. You wanted to go run away and play pirate after your dad."

"The one time I ever ask you for something- I needed you out there Sam."

"And I needed you here! With me. When you left...". She could get the words out.

There was more, Adam could tell, but now wasn't the time. Adam could feel it, horrible knife edge of choice. He knew one wrong word would snuff out the tiny fire they'd rebuilt now and he'd lose her. Again. He remembered now just how devastating that had been the first time. Not again. Not ever.

"I don't care.". Adam said. Sam tried to pull back from his words, but he dragged her in closer, one arm snatching her hip. "When I lost you, it felt like half of my life was gone. You were the best part of me. And I don't care why you wouldn't come with me then. Just promise me you'll stay with me now."

Sam's mouth worked wordlessly, her eyes wrought with emotion.

"I need you, Sam. You don't know what its been like. My life is a mess and everything is insane. I'm on the run from GalSec AND the mob. I just hit second puberty. I'm scared and confused and angry and tired. Oh and I've got romantic feelings for someone I really shouldn't have-"

Adam was cut off by the hard press of Sam's lips against his own. She rolled on top of him and was pressed against his whole front now. One hand clenched into his short hair, pinning his head in place, the other clutching his collar. She didn't just play with his mouth, so much as attack it. Her tongue slipping between his lips to dance with his own. Sam purred when she kissed, like a well fed lioness. As she pulled back she bit him on the lower lip, dragging her teeth almost painfully along his flesh. She stared down at him, proudly possessive, like a conquistador claiming the new world.

Adam remembered to breath again. He was almost afraid to speak, a million thoughts buzzing through his head. As always, he picked the worse one.

"I was talking about Cindi."

Sam left in a fury. Adam hadn't follower her. That was for the best. What started as a reconciliation had ended in disaster. What had she been thinking? Adam was never in love with her. That had always been Sam's issue, but for Adam, she was his friend. Best friend certainly, but never more than that. She'd seen her chance and it had been too tempting. She'd dared to hope, that was her mistake. She didn't even blame him. Things were worse than ever and it was STILL all her fault. Just like five years ago.

Sam didn't even recall how she got home. One second she'd been getting up from a confused Adam, dodging his stares and questions, and the next she was staring down at her sleeping blonde cousin. Whom Adam apparently had feelings for. Sam wanted to hate her. She wanted to know what made her so special? Adam loved Cindi. Francis had loved Cindi. Hell, even her mom loved Cindi. So why her? She was pretty, and the boobs, she admitted those were nothing short of incredible. Sam wasn't a Lez, but she could appreciate a nice body. Was that all it was? Was this just some fucked up chemical reaction from whatever had happened to Adam? Or was there more to it?

What if he loved her? What if? What if? What if? And if he could love a sister, why not a cousin? Argggg. None of it made any sense. She wanted to scream and rage. Terrible thoughts built in the deep recesses of her mind. She wanted to kill her or herself, or both of them. She wanted to pull off Cindi's skin and wear it like a coat. Why her? Why her and not Sam? What was SO wrong with her?

"Why can't he love who I am?" Sam froze, as her words caused Cindi to roll over and squint up.

"Sam?"

All that anger built into a volcano, ready to erupt. She felt the fury build in her.

"Come to bed, silly." Cindi reached blindly for Sam's hand, found it and tugged. "I was waiting for you."

And just like that the fury was gone. Snuffed out like a candle in the wind. Sam wordlessly stripped out of her soaked clothes, wiping a few streaks of thin bloody ooze on her shirt. She followed Cindi into bed and didn't fight when the girl pushed into her usual spot, dragging Sam's arm around too squeeze it.

"I missed you, Big Sam." Cindi called back sleepily.

The words broke her. Tears, hot and salty poured down her face to smear into Cindi's hair. She tried to keep quiet, but failed. Cindi turned around in confusion, shock written on her face. She threw her arms around Sam and squeezed as hard as she could.

"Its gonna be ok. Whatever is happening, its gonna be ok."

But it only made Sam cry harder. She buried her face in the pillow to stifle her cries. Cindi never left her, instead she gently stroked Sam's hair, humming a little lullaby from their childhood sleepovers. Eventually the tears slowed, then stopped, eyes glassy, face blotchy as hell, Sam turned to face her cousin. Cindi's big eyes met her own, her hands cradling Sam's head gently, she bent and kissed her brow. Wordlessly loving her. Accepting her. Sam could see the appeal of this girl. It was like a lifetime supply of positive feelings.

"Why doesn't anybody ever want me? Am I just not good .... enough?" Sam whispered, terrified of the answer.

Cindi's eyes looked a little teary herself. "I want you."

"Why?

"Because after you stood on the monkey bars, when Adam would run off to play with his friends, you'd walk me home. When my ice cream fell on the ground, you gave me yours. And when that bully Elaria Vinchens stole my favorite bear, you knocked out her buck teeth. You were always there for me." Cindi smiled tremulously.

"You're my sister. I'll always want you, Sam."

And with that, Cindi rolled Sam into the little spoon and she drifted to sleep, safe in the warm arms of someone who loved her.