With the Boyfriend (Natalie PoV)*

I loved my boyfriend. He was sweet, kind, and caring. Smart too. It was what initially attracted me to him. There were plenty of interested guys chasing after me, but he stood out from the rest. Humor, intellect, and looks. The complete package. For two years we’d built a strong relationship to stand on. Once he graduated and found a job, I would follow him wherever. I fully expected us to get married in a few years. I had responsibilities to Alexis, but he understood.

I loved Tommy with all my heart, but god damn if he couldn’t piss me off. I’d driven over an hour to spend time with him and his idea of ‘hanging out’ was partying with his friends. I understood. Really, I did. Parties were awesome and he was under a lot of stress and worked hard during the week. But this was the first time in three weeks that we were together for more than a roll in the sack.

His friends were terrible influences on him. Ever since he started rooming with them, he’d changed. What happened to the man who enjoyed spending a quiet night alone watching TV and snuggling? Now it was just party, party, party. Yes, he was working off the stress from the week, but so was I. I didn’t need to party my entire free time away—especially when I had limited time to spend with those I loved. I knew all too well the appeal of the party life, and the less time I spent doing it the better.

So we spent the first weekend in three weeks playing stupid drinking games and wasting time than spending it with each other. The party was fun and all, but I had come all this way to spend time with him, not get smashed, answer embarrassing questions about my sex life, and flash my breasts when I inevitably lost in some stupid drinking game.

And I hated how he kept telling me to loosen up. I knew how to have fun and I enjoyed doing stupid stuff as much as everyone else, but this wasn’t the weekend for that and he should have known better.

So I might have drank a bit too much. I knew I was knocking them back too quickly, but my anger clouded my judgment. Anger and **** never mixed well. **** and I didn’t mix well, especially when I went at it like a super heavyweight champion when the reality was I was a featherweight.

It’s how I ended up fucking Tommy right there in the living room of his shared house. My memory was spotty, but I remembered enough. How I fell under Tommy’s smooth prodding. How my horny ass sucked him off while his friends hollered and cheered. How I climbed atop his dick and rode him with all I had while they watched. How Tommy removed my shirt and bra to expose me to all his friends. The way he encouraged me to say filthy things. The cheering as he finished inside me despite knowing we used condoms because I wasn’t on the pill.

Waking up with those memories made me sick. I’m sure the **** played the lion's share of why I spent my waking morning kneeling before the toilet as I emptied my stomach until there was nothing left. Thinking of how everyone watched me drunk-fuck Tommy certainly didn’t make my morning any brighter. I felt humiliated and angry. What the fuck had he been thinking? Friends or not, no one had any business witnessing what should have been an intimate moment between us. The old Tommy would have never even considered something like that.

And when I really thought about it, I wasn’t all that mad about the act itself, but how he made it a spectacle. The things I did… Said… The way he encouraged them all to watch…

Hands shaking, I splashed cold water on my face and looked up at the mirror. I looked as I felt—like shit.

This wasn’t how things were supposed to be. My mind wandered to last week. I hadn’t meant to spend the night at Jake’s apartment. Or drink enough to make poor decisions. I remembered waking to find myself with a blanket over me and a pillow under my head. Dejected from Tommy blowing off another weekend together, I suffered a moment of weakness. I had only meant to check on Jake, but seeing his sleeping face… I don’t know what I was thinking when I climbed into bed with him—or why I undressed before doing so.

“Fuck,” I whispered to my reflection. What the fuck was I doing? Jake was seven years younger than me. He hadn’t even graduated high school yet for Christ’s sake. I had Tommy. The love of my life. The man I was going to marry. Jake was just a friend of the family and nothing more.

But he wasn’t just a family friend, was he? Despite his age, there was a mental maturity I never expected. He’d been like that ever since Alexis and I met him for the first time. Jake was always calm and collected and thought things over before acting. Beyond everything, he listened. It wasn’t just listening either, but there was insight there. He had an emotional intelligence that was honestly shocking. It was like he knew what those around him were feeling. I suppose it had something to do with his Gift. He’d never explained what it was, but that wasn’t a surprise. The only reason why I knew he had one was because he went to that expensive preppy Gifted school rich people sent their kids to.

One of his many little mysteries that made up Jake. Why was a kid his age so damn mature? I remembered what I was doing at eighteen. Why was he living in a dump apartment like ours when he clearly had some money available to him? What kind of Gift did he have?

Why did he have to be so damn good-looking?

I splashed more water on my face before leaning forward against the sink. Water ran down my face before falling towards the drain. “Fuck, Natalie.” That last thought came out of nowhere. At least I pretended it was out of nowhere. It was a thought that shouldn’t exist. Objectively, he was attractive—for being seven years younger. I needed to remind myself of that. I knew it wasn’t some taboo age gap, but we were in different life stages. I’d convinced myself it was because he reminded me of Tommy when we had first started dating. Quiet and thoughtful. Jake was more intense with his perfect emotional control, but once you spent the time to get to know him it was something you didn't notice much.

Last week I’d fucked up, yet Jake never took advantage of me in that moment of weakness. He didn’t even make a big deal about it. No judgment or teasing, just a silent acknowledgment that it happened and we were moving on. Like actual adults. Moments like that were like a breath of fresh air. Around him, things seemed to slow down. My life was spent in a rush. It felt like I needed to constantly be doing something or things would fall apart. Alexis needed prodding or she’d lie around all day. Work needed doing. Bills needed paid. With Jake, he pulled me into his world and slowed me to his pace. Only then could I take a breath and simply breathe.

Something Tommy did.

Does. Tommy does.

Deep breath, I looked up again. I should have never started drinking. I always did stupid shit when I started drinking. It didn’t take much for me to lose control, and I’d had a lot last night. Tommy should have stopped me. Physically stopped me, not his half-ass warnings. He knew how I got when **** was involved. I’d worked hard to distance myself and redefine who I was. This wasn’t who I was anymore.

I dabbed off my face with my shirt. No way I was going to touch those towels. Feeling a bit more collected, I opened the door and nearly ran into Lucas, one of Tommy’s roommates.

“Rough morning?” he asked with a slimy smile. I hated it. Hated how he looked at me. His eyes drifted down and I was glad I’d been in my right mind to grab a shirt before running to the bathroom. My arms automatically crossed themselves, covering my chest. It’s where his eyes lingered.

“Fine,” I croaked before clearing my throat.

“That you are.”

Ugh. What did Tommy see in these immature clowns?

I didn’t grace him with a response. Stepping aside, I moved to pass him only to have him block my path. Frowning, I tried again only for him to once more block me. Eyes narrowing, I gave him a **** glare until he relented, letting me pass. Tightening my arms around my chest, I was **** to brush past him—the asshole was purposefully taking up most of the hall. Glancing over my shoulder, I found him staring at my ass so I reached back to pull my shirt down. Even if it was covering everything before, I needed to make a point of it.

Inside Tommy’s room, I shut the door and closed my eyes. Lucas had seen me naked. They’d all seen me naked. When I dug in deeper to the feelings of disgust and shame, it wasn’t the nakedness that tore at me. It was them seeing a side of me I’d walked away from. That wasn’t me. I was a respectable woman. I had a career and had responsibilities. That woman they saw wasn’t me, yet it was all they could see now. It was all they would ever see me as.

“You okay?” Tommy asked as he got off the bed. “Heard you were having a rough morning.”

I glared at him, causing him to stop about halfway to me.

“What?”

Unbelievable. He seriously had no idea? I continued to glare, waiting for him to break and apologize. It took a few good long seconds for me to realize he was being serious. My god. He didn’t even know he fucked up.

“Are you serious?”

“What?” he asked, oblivious.

“Last night?”

He grinned. “Things did get a bit out of hand—”

“A bit? A bit? Tommy, you fucked me in front of all your friends!” Closing the distance, he tried to hug me but I brushed him off. “Don’t.”

“Come on, Babe. It’s no big deal—”

“Are you fucking kidding me right now? No big deal?”

“Like they haven’t heard you—”

“Christ, Tommy. Hearing and having front row seats are two very different things.”

“You didn’t stop me!”

“Don’t turn this back around on me! You know how I am when I drink.”

“And who was the one drinking? I told you to stop. You were the one who kept going. You always keep going.” I winced. I did remember him warning me. My anger kept me going.

“And you elevated things farther. For what? So you could impress all your Bros? Show off the nice piece of ass you have on tap?”

He frowned. “You know that’s not true.”

“Do I?”

“We were drunk. Things happen.”

I shook my head. It was hard to think with how livid I was. He was treating this all like it was no big deal when I was standing right in front of him telling him it was. I felt like I was arguing to a fucking brick wall.

Reaching out, he ran his hands along my arms. “Don’t touch me.”

“Babe…” I said nothing as I went for my clothes. “Natalie,” he said, finally saying my name in a voice I was familiar with. “I know I fucked up—”

“Do you?”

Letting out a long breath, he rubbed the back of his neck. “You’re right. I could have stopped it—should have stopped it. I won’t lie and say that showing you off wasn’t why I pushed for it. It was stupid, childish, and most of all it was selfish. I didn’t consider how you would feel.” That apology might have worked. It wasn’t enough to extinguish my anger, but it cooled it enough for me to think.

The old Tommy would have stopped there.

“It’s just the guys have all done it in some way and I… I guess I just wanted to fit in.”

Zipping up my jeans, I turned to face him. He genuinely looked regretful and reflecting on his actions.

If he had only stopped while he was ahead.

Moving over to him, he looked down to meet my eyes. “Do you see the problem there, Thomas?” He didn’t answer me, eyes suddenly avoiding mine. “You treated me like some party slut to get your cock wet. Is that what I am?” His silence and avoiding all attempts for me to make eye contact only served to feed my anger. “Answer me, Thomas.”

He shook his head.

“Then don’t fucking treat me like one. You didn’t even use a condom. Now I have to go and buy a morning-after pill.” I let out a long breath, hoping to let out some of the hotness building inside me. At the same time, I ran a hand over my face. I felt like shit. My head was pounding, my throat hurt, my abs were sore.

“All I wanted was to spend time with you,” I muttered, fighting off tears.

“Natalie…” he called out as I left. I passed the guys hanging out in the kitchen. No idea if they heard our conversation or not. Ultimately I didn’t care. I just wanted to get away before I lost it. I didn’t stop until I made it to my car. Hopping inside, I took off.

This wasn’t how this weekend was supposed to go. This wasn’t how any of this was supposed to go.

It was a long and lonely journey home.