Pick Jennifer

“Really, that’s the best you can do for a comeback? ‘So…’?” you laugh, imitating Brooke’s voice.

Brooke gapes at you, her mouth open, shocked that you’d be so rude to her.

“That’s what happens when you keep bottling it up,” Jennifer laughs, pointing at Brooke. “Eventually, you lose all your words.”

“You really should learn to express yourself better,” you say. “Right now, you’re about as eloquent as one of your beloved paintings.”

The pointed little ‘o’ that Brooke’s mouth makes abruptly snaps shut. She harrumphs, positively fuming as she stalks away, and a matter of seconds later, it’s clear that she’s made her exit from the venue.

“How thin skinned,” Jennifer laughs, shaking her head. “She could really use some lessons in mental health and resilience.”

“Pity she didn’t stick around,” you say, just as the speaker clears her throat, drawing the audience in.

The person at the podium is a pudgy, pasty woman who looks something north of forty. She’s dressed in a vaguely ethnic shawl that’s just plain enough to duck any accusations of cultural appropriation. She has some nasty looking green smoothie in one hand, a microphone loosely held in her other. This is a classic university administrator if you’ve ever seen one.

“Namaste, friends, thank you for coming to today’s gratitude workshop. Before we begin, let’s all take a moment of silence to acknowledge that the land we’re standing on—or sitting on, no judgment for the differently abled here!—yes, that this land that we’re all on… It was stolen from the Powhatan and the…” She pauses, coughing, saying something like “Cheyenne”, but it really could be anything.

Everyone stares at her expectantly, but it seems that’s it. This is the moment of silence.

You make eyes with Jennifer, who gags.

“Okay, now I’m glad that Brooke left,” she whispers.

“She would have been insufferable if she saw this,” you agree.

“I’m 99% sure the Cheyenne never lived anywhere close to here,” Jennifer says.

You chuckle, shaking your head at the ridiculousness of the situation. Most people gathered around are having hushed conversations, while the woman up front frowns, her lips twitching.

“Friends, friends, let’s try to keep it down. We are trying to be respectful. The theme of today’s workshop is gratitude, not disrespect.”

“Damn, we’re not here to learn to disrespect?” you say quietly. “Could’ve fooled me.”

That earns you a few giggles from Jennifer, but luckily, the woman up front doesn’t seem to notice.

“When we go about life, we often get caught up in all sorts of crazy, stressful situations,” the woman continues. “But it turns out, studies show that simply taking a moment and expressing gratitude can make your day much better! So let’s all take a minute and think of something that we’re grateful for. For example, I’m grateful for these organic Green Dream smoothies—” she takes a big drink from it, leaving green residue on her lips “—they must be why I haven’t gotten cancer yet! Hahaha.” You notice nobody is laughing along with her. You and Jennifer share a glance. “Okay. Everybody, quiet now, and take a minute to think of something that you’re grateful for, and share it with somebody next to you!”

This time, the room falls into genuine silence as people ponder what things they have in life to be grateful for. For you, lots of things come to mind immediately: a loving family (well, mostly. Gina’s a notable exception, and Lisa… who knows when it comes to her. But at least your parents are pretty good. Most of the time.), a school that you enjoy (well, mostly. Classes can be a lot, and your psych prof’s a real work of art. But mostly things are good.), hot girls in abundance… {if The Count > 0} and you’ve even gotten to fuck some of them. {else} and you’re well on you’re way to fucking some of them. {endif} That’s got to be a pretty swell life, eh?

Just then, the sound of chattering from others interrupts your thoughts. You see Jennifer looking at you expectantly.

“Guess it’s time to say our thanks,” you say, holding out your hands as if you’re about to say grace. Jennifer gets the idea, and you soon feel two hands slip into yours. You give them a squeeze, feeling her squeeze back in turn, and you smile. “You want to share first?”

“Sure!” Jennifer says brightly. “I’m grateful for… for my tablet. It lets me express myself in a way that nothing else can. So much of what I want to say never comes out right when I use words, but when it comes to making art… it’s like I can suddenly make myself known.”

You nod thoughtfully.

“Yeah, I feel the same way,” you say. “I mean, I don’t really make art or anything like that, but when I make music, that’s really when I feel like I’m most myself, you know?”

“Totally,” Jennifer nods eagerly. “But also, you definitely make art! Your music is seriously good!”

“Hang on,” you say, “You’ve heard my stuff before? And we’ve never talked about this before?”

“I… I mean, once I figured out that I already had some of your songs on my playlists, I guess I thought it would be creepy to bring it up?” she says. “But I guess now the secret’s out.”

“There’s nothing to be embarrassed by,” you smile. “I’m flattered.” You see her doubtful look, and continue: “Really! Not every day that you find a fan.”

“Okay, if you say so,” Jennifer says, seeming to relax a bit, and then she perks up again. “Hey, I’ve gone, so now it’s your turn. What are you grateful for?”

“Oh, me?” you say. “I’m grateful for a lot.” You quickly try to remember what you were thinking of earlier.

Hot girls. No, that won’t do. But maybe…

“I’m grateful to have met you,” you say.

“Aww,” Jennifer says, looking a bit self-conscious again, so you swoop down, giving her a peck on the lips.

The motion catches Jennifer by surprise, and she abruptly steps back, touching her lips, giving you a curious look. That’s when you realize: up until that moment, Jennifer was still holding your hand.

“I… I should probably get going,” she quickly says. “I need to… um… schoolwork. Homework. Bye!”

“Bye?” you say, smiling at her panicked reaction as she quickly makes her departure from the scene.

Jennifer +25
Brooke -5