Not really. It's worse than that.

Jeremy glances over at the passenger seat for the umpteenth time since they left home. His son, Andrew, pointedly ignores him by looking out the window, arms folded across his chest.

Great. Just great. Jeremy clears his throat, prepares to say something, anything, to break the silence.

Just as he opens his mouth, Andrew's hand shoots out, lightning-fast, towards the car radio. Some happy pop tune fills the car at top volume, drowning out whatever Jeremy was about to say. Jeremy snaps his mouth shut, looks at the passenger seat again. His son glares back defiantly, red blots showing up on his cheeks.

Okay. Deep breath. Andrew's temperament sometimes seems like an unholy mix of both his parents' worst sides. As much as Jeremy would love to remind his son who's boss, that would result in a drawn-out shouting match. And Jeremy's trying, he really is. He wants to be a cool dad. A chill dad. And it's the kid's birthday, after all.

Or course, it doesn't help the tension any that Jeremy walked in on Andrew during a... private moment.

"Son," Jeremy starts -- no good, he can't even hear himself over the music. He reaches for the car radio, simultaneously trying to meet his son's baleful gaze and to keep an eye on traffic. The music turns off abruptly. Wrong button. Andrew's glare intensifies.

"Son," Jeremy tries again. "I get that you're... embarrassed--"

"Oh my god."

"--but there's really... there's no reason to, these--"

"I'm not hearing this. I'm not."

"--perfectly normal urges. In fact, when I was your age..."

"Dad! We don't need to talk about this!" Andrew looks as if he's about ready to jump out of the moving car. "Like, ever."

"I'm just saying, I understand," Jeremy mutters. Not for the first time, he wonders why it's so hard to talk to his son. Talking to the guys at the construction site is a lot easier--but maybe that's because he's responsible for their paycheck. He's never walked in on one of his employees jerking off either, so there's that.

The silence grows. Jeremy struggles for something, anything to say, and comes up blank. Then--an inspiration. "So... you seeing anyone?"

Andrew squints his eyes. "What?"

"Are you seeing anyone? Do you have a girlfriend?"

His son makes a small noise in the back of his throat that somehow perfectly expresses he finds the question both offensive and ridiculous. Jeremy waits, not taking his eyes off the road. Finally, Andrew deigns to reply. "No, dad, I'm not seeing anyone. Thanks so much for asking and pointing that out. Are you?"

"I--oh, no, I..." Jeremy says, flustered. Lamely, he finishes, "I still miss your mom too much."

He can practically hear Andrew's eye-roll at that. "Why do you always talk about mom like she died, instead of ditching us to shack up in with Rrro-dri-go in Barcelona?"

"Andrew!"

"Whatever. You know it's true."

"Well." Jeremy huffs. "Even if it's true, there's no reason to be so, so blunt about it."

"Seriously, dad? Being blunt is the issue here?"

"Yeah, yeah, all right. Can we just drop this, please?" The kid's got a point, though: maybe it's time to get over Sharon. Jeremy hasn't dated anyone in over a year now, not counting his monthly trips to the Cupid's Arrows, because he pays for those. He would claim he's too busy with work, but the truth is the guys at the site run such a tight ship they only need him to come in to sign off on everyone's hours.

"Why did you ask, anyway? If I have a girlfriend?"

Wait, does Andrew sound... nervous? The kid is staring at his hands instead of getting all in Jeremy's face, as he usually does. Maybe he's worried Jeremy found out about the credit card -- in fact, he's known about his son using one of his credit cards to access an "erotic webcam" site pretty much since the start, and he really doesn't mind. If anything, he feels like there's finally something about his son he understand. He was just the same as a teenager. That's what this whole outing is about. It's practically a family tradition.

"Oh," Jeremy says, playing it cool. "Just asking. I wouldn't want to get you into trouble."

"What does that mean?"

This is going to be great. By the end of the day, his son will practically worship him, like he did when he was a small child. "You'll see."

"Uh. You're freaking me out, dad."

Jeremy just smiles. "You'll see."