No.

Lauren didn't know if she was too scared to admit it or that she just didn't feel that way.

"I'm... I'm sorry Susanne... I just, I don't." Lauren looked at the wall, trying her best not to make eye contact.

Susanne looked at her understanding. "I get it, it's alright. I knew it was far fetched. After all you're into boys."

Lauren nodded. Still not completely behind her own decision.

"don't worry about it." Susanne gave her a wry smile.

Even though Lauren knew it was fake, she felt glad Susanne understood the situation.

"Do you feel ready for tomorrow?"

Lauren shrugged. "As ready as I'll ever be for these thing. Thank you for your help.." She said still having a difficult time with knowing what was going to come tomorrow.

Lauren doubted for a second, but then still decided to ask Susanne a very needed favor. "If I ever need help. Can I count on you Susanne?" Lauren finally asked afraid of the answer.

"Of course you can silly." Susanne said with a sweet smile. "I will be there for you and you will be fine. I promise. If anything goes wrong just come to me."

Lauren nodded. She was tired from the entire experience. "I think I'm going to need some rest now."

Susanne nodded. "sleep tight Lauren... You will be fine." She gave Lauren a small caring peck on the forehead and left the room.

Lauren was left alone with her thoughts. Her body felt completely exhausted but her mind was restless. She wondered whether she gave the right answer. Susanne made her feel things that she had never felt before. And yet... she couldn't imagine being with another woman. Was this because she was afraid? Or was there just nothing there and did her first time confuse this with love.

She pondered on it. Her mind now engulfing in a completely different confusing subject than the fear of what was to come.

Eventually though Lauren gave in to the exhaustion and drifted into a restless sleep.